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Well first off I would like to wish Cheetoh a happy birthday. You are 18 now...YAY!!
Ok well like usual meh life SUCKS ASS!!!
Nothing goes how it is supposed and I am getting about fucking tired of it. Well I actually moved all of meh stuff into the other house, but of course something doesn't go as planned. Well this time it is the heat & phone...they are not working at this current time. DAMN IT!!! Ugh it makes meh sooooo mad. I am not looking forward to school ending for break b/c I will have nothing to do. I will just beh sitting on meh ass doing nothing. Well hopefully I can go out with meh friends a couple of times before I go back to Davie County. I will beh going there Dec. 23-26. And hopefully Jan. 1-2nd. MEH BIRTHDAY IS ON DECEMBER 26TH!!!! I am not really looking forward to becoming an adult...I still miss the times I was like 15...that was the best year of meh life...the worst year...but the best...:*(.
I hate being fake. Like meh whole life is fake. But I know if I go back to acting how I did (Sterotypical Goth) then I will be shipped off again...But I am also tired of being a fake. Like being happy EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!! You try to tell meh a day that I have been seen sad or mad at school...I bet you can't name one. I am like incognito or something. I wish I could express how I really feel without being scared that something will happen...like getting sent to another hospital...and this time I will be registered as an adult, which they usually don't get out for a LOOOOOOOONG time. If I actually start to act out how I feel, I won't be able to be as independent as I am now and I will have EVERYONE on meh back. I HATE THIS FUCKING SHIT!!!!!
I am just thinking about going back to Davie County...at least then I could act how I wanted and not be fake...:*(.
I really feel like going back to meh old habits...I haven't cut in soooo long, I mean I have done it a little here or there, but comparing to when I used to do it two or three times a day...it was meh stress reliever. I miss it like an old friend. Most people think that I am sick, but it is just the way I vent out meh emotions, it is addicting just like cigarettes or drugs...IT IS A DRUG! I have been debating it for a long while...I don't know what to do...I don't think I can take it anymore...
Ok well like usual meh life SUCKS ASS!!!
Nothing goes how it is supposed and I am getting about fucking tired of it. Well I actually moved all of meh stuff into the other house, but of course something doesn't go as planned. Well this time it is the heat & phone...they are not working at this current time. DAMN IT!!! Ugh it makes meh sooooo mad. I am not looking forward to school ending for break b/c I will have nothing to do. I will just beh sitting on meh ass doing nothing. Well hopefully I can go out with meh friends a couple of times before I go back to Davie County. I will beh going there Dec. 23-26. And hopefully Jan. 1-2nd. MEH BIRTHDAY IS ON DECEMBER 26TH!!!! I am not really looking forward to becoming an adult...I still miss the times I was like 15...that was the best year of meh life...the worst year...but the best...:*(.
I hate being fake. Like meh whole life is fake. But I know if I go back to acting how I did (Sterotypical Goth) then I will be shipped off again...But I am also tired of being a fake. Like being happy EVERY SINGLE DAY!!!! You try to tell meh a day that I have been seen sad or mad at school...I bet you can't name one. I am like incognito or something. I wish I could express how I really feel without being scared that something will happen...like getting sent to another hospital...and this time I will be registered as an adult, which they usually don't get out for a LOOOOOOOONG time. If I actually start to act out how I feel, I won't be able to be as independent as I am now and I will have EVERYONE on meh back. I HATE THIS FUCKING SHIT!!!!!
I am just thinking about going back to Davie County...at least then I could act how I wanted and not be fake...:*(.
I really feel like going back to meh old habits...I haven't cut in soooo long, I mean I have done it a little here or there, but comparing to when I used to do it two or three times a day...it was meh stress reliever. I miss it like an old friend. Most people think that I am sick, but it is just the way I vent out meh emotions, it is addicting just like cigarettes or drugs...IT IS A DRUG! I have been debating it for a long while...I don't know what to do...I don't think I can take it anymore...