On Loyalty.
Background
I have two blogs at the moment, I'll cut back to just this one because this is MY fucking blog, the other is for annoying idiots who don't have any reason to be in this one, this one's where I put how I feel, what I want, who I want, what's going on, my PRIVATE shit. Again, since my ego's the largest I've encountered, I, myself, consider anyone who comes here to read this and knows who I am as well as has gotten the address from me (or by tracking my punk ass down (ahem - mfeg)) to be lucky to even be here. Hell, it's for those of you that I DON'T know that I keep it unlocked, well, also because my ego is SOOO HUGE that I feel like y'all want to read it. If you don't, then don't! I say that many times, and I mean it for everyone except Bob, Hen, and Hah. Y'all, this is required reading for you, because, occaisionally I hang out with you (Hen and Hah, sooooooon.... as I'm kinda half walking again).
Here's the story. This chickie on MySpace sent me a message to be my friend. She's kinda hot, so I took the invite and we started talkin. Mikey has had a crush on her since they were in junior high school together, and was against it from the start. He was good enough not to "cockblock" me, atleast so it seemed. SO we talked, and it seemed like we might be able to have something, something real and substantial. She wanted me to come over to her place and cuddle, to stay the night. So, I did. We had sex. I thought there was going to be a relationship there, and there could have been. Mikey, as one of my "circle" or "tier one friends", who I've known since 10 - 11 years old, asked me not to talk to her, he doesn't know about the sex, but he basicially said - "I can't imagine you having sex with her and it would crush me. You have sex with everyone you date (not true, I never slept with Msv) and it would...." so I broke up with her.
SO she's calling me a player and all sorts of shit, we talked on the phone post breakup and agreed not to talk shit about eachother. I can NOT make her understand why I did what I did, and she totally locked her myspace page, so only her "friends" can see it. I KNOW she's talkin mad shit about me. I know she is. However, I'm taking the high road, and venting in here (ha, high road my ass) but in the "blog" over there, where I've been keeping up on surgery notes, I did post this little gem, and I wanted it to be put here as well. Because, well, y'all don't know about the myspace. I'd send you to her myspace page to look if ya wanted to, but as I said - she's locked it. So, with no further background, here's what I put there.
Post from other Blog (MySpace)
I figured I'd rant in here. Cause, well, I rant.
I'm a very loyal person to people who have earned it, or who havn't done anything obvious and lost it. Also, I give second and third and many chances, burn me once shame on you, burn me twice, cause I'm an idiot. The previous blog entry, well, if you read it, may hint at something, I'm not going in depth, but one thing you totally have to understand is I'd do anything, ANYTHING, for my friends. Through all I've been through they've always been there for me, not ever asked much, and I've tried to be the best friend I could. For anything.
So when something comes up and I have to choose, between someone who I LOVE like a brother, and someone who's relatively new to my world, honestly, what do you think I'm going to do? Who do you think I'm going to choose? I know, always, I should take things slower then I do, and hold off on the things that I do, that I do quickly, but I NEVER expect things to turn out the way that they do. This, darlings, is life, and will never be what you expect, unless you have a crystal ball or something.
Fear has a way of paralyzing us. We need to look past our fears and see what may lay in the future. And in everything you do, try not to hurt other people. You should expend energy doing the things you want to, when you want to do them, and not worry about all of the consequences, or where it may lead, because, the point of life is not to suffer throughout the whole thing, it's to live, to learn, to love, and to connect with whoever or whatever you want. Except sheep. Never, ever, love a sheep.
Carpe Diem,
~D
Closing
That was it. There's nothing to close, I just wanted to put it in here as afore mentioned. I'm serious, this, was another case of me talking to a girl that turned into a total clusterfuck. If you're intersted in MY myspace, Here is the link.
Later kiddos, I appreciate you all. I'm really NOT a player, I swear.
~D