(no subject)
I had the worst dream.
It was similar to Children Of Men and that's probably because we saw it last night. If anyone has seen it, you'll realize what I'm talking about. And for anyone who hasn't seen it, I apologize. This probably won't make sense. But I'm trying to not go into so much detail when I explain things because no one ever really gets the point so I'll keep this short maybe.
It was present day, the government wasn't crazy or anything but for some reason people were going into cages to be deported (so maybe the government was crazy?). We had done nothing wrong and we thought we were safe. But all of the sudden these people rushed in and took Katy away. I ran after them to see where they were taking her and they threw her into one of the cages on the back of a big truck. I tried so hard to get her out but they kept hitting me every time I tried but I wouldn't stop.
And then the truck started to drive away. It went down a big hill and I couldn't see it anymore. There was not a damn thing I could do to help her. I went back to where we were before they took her away and no one was there. My family wasn't there, Jake wasn't there, none of my other friends were there. No one. I was completely alone. and it was the worst feeling in the world. I could actually feel it too.
When I woke up I had tears in my eyes and my heart hurt.
It just made me realize that I cannot live without my Katy.
I can't even imagine what life would be like without her.
It also makes me think of my Jacob. I miss him so much. There's not one day that goes by that I don't think about him and start to cry. I look at the picture of him and I next to my bed and I can't stop thinking about what life would be like if he were still here. I'm so appreciative of his friendship. He helped shape who I am today. I don't feel like he's with me anymore and it makes me feel vulnerable and like a part of me is missing. I can't believe it's been almost a year. June 17th will be a hard day for me. No one will understand why because I don't expect anyone to keep tabs on significant days in my life. It's like it happened yesterday. I still can't believe it.
I just can't fucking believe it.
I miss you so much.
I wish you were here.
It was similar to Children Of Men and that's probably because we saw it last night. If anyone has seen it, you'll realize what I'm talking about. And for anyone who hasn't seen it, I apologize. This probably won't make sense. But I'm trying to not go into so much detail when I explain things because no one ever really gets the point so I'll keep this short maybe.
It was present day, the government wasn't crazy or anything but for some reason people were going into cages to be deported (so maybe the government was crazy?). We had done nothing wrong and we thought we were safe. But all of the sudden these people rushed in and took Katy away. I ran after them to see where they were taking her and they threw her into one of the cages on the back of a big truck. I tried so hard to get her out but they kept hitting me every time I tried but I wouldn't stop.
And then the truck started to drive away. It went down a big hill and I couldn't see it anymore. There was not a damn thing I could do to help her. I went back to where we were before they took her away and no one was there. My family wasn't there, Jake wasn't there, none of my other friends were there. No one. I was completely alone. and it was the worst feeling in the world. I could actually feel it too.
When I woke up I had tears in my eyes and my heart hurt.
It just made me realize that I cannot live without my Katy.
I can't even imagine what life would be like without her.
It also makes me think of my Jacob. I miss him so much. There's not one day that goes by that I don't think about him and start to cry. I look at the picture of him and I next to my bed and I can't stop thinking about what life would be like if he were still here. I'm so appreciative of his friendship. He helped shape who I am today. I don't feel like he's with me anymore and it makes me feel vulnerable and like a part of me is missing. I can't believe it's been almost a year. June 17th will be a hard day for me. No one will understand why because I don't expect anyone to keep tabs on significant days in my life. It's like it happened yesterday. I still can't believe it.
I just can't fucking believe it.
I miss you so much.
I wish you were here.