wow ;]* hi
What'sss up?!~!@#
Nothing here... I have not written in here in like 26347124693 days. Not like it matters.. no one reads it or comments, but anyways it's for me to keep up with my life anyways. Well, okay so like a month ago Terry(I went out with him for a year)just decides to leave to go to Vicksburg(like two hours away)and tell me he's coming back.. But he never exactly came back... and he didn't call me.. So I had to call his dad's phone like 3547 times a day... and finally Terry calls me back and tells me he's confused...and he just needed to figure out what it was that was making him depressed. So, we talked for a few days and everything was okay.. and THEN I find out he came back to Meridian and didn't even call me or come over or nothing. Soooo, forget that.
I had started kinda missing Fernando(my ex - fiance).. anyways.. so now I believe me and Fernando are talking again. Fernando is in the Navy, and so right now he's on a ship right outside of Iraq.. so all I can do is email back and forth with him. He says that if I am still here like, talking to him and waiting on him whenever he gets back from Iraq, that he will come get me and move to Virginia to be with him. So, I'm very* happy about that. I asked him if he'd be upset or anything if it took me a little while to get used to him again, and he said that that would be fine.. yanno.. He's the sweetest guy.
I'm just kinda scared to try and get close to someone again.. because I thought I knew everything about Terry.. I thought I knew what he was thinking, why he was happy/sad/mad/whatever.. and then it just so happens I apparently know absolutely nothing about him. And that hurt really bad that he could just LEAVE me like that.. and not even think twice about it. ;/ I'm kinda scared of relationships now because I've never been hurt like that. I mean, Fernando wouldn't hurt me like that. I've basically BEEN with him for four years.. but, then again.. - I didn't think Terry would, either.
*shrugs* it's just a big mess. Also I have no job anymore. I was working at O'Charley's (a restauraunt), but I just had enough of the GM up there, and I thought I was moving to Vicksburg with Terry anyways... so I quit. And I STILL haven't found a job. No one will call me back. I call people I've already talked to and filled out applications for, and the positions have already been filled. It just sucks. ;[* I'm not getting hardly CRAP back from taxes.. BLEH~!@!# I've been hanging out with an old friend, John, and his two year old baby girl Jody for the past few days. He likes me, I think.. he's just so sweet and he's very considerate... I just don't think I could really be in a relationship with him. I'm trying to get my life straight(with Fernando, kinda). I have to be sure that I am okay by myself first... then think about relationships.
But, I KNOW I am in love with Fernando. There is no question about it. I have loved that boy ever since I began 9th grade.. and now I'm out of high school, and I still feel exactly the same for him as I used to. It's just been like a year since I have seen him and gotten to hang out with him, because last year I was engaged to him. So, I don't know how we'll act together now. We've both changed... and we just have to figure out a way to work together. <3 I love him..wow.
Anyways - so I am watching Cram, and about to get offline and play Skip Bo.. So, I'll try and remember to update later okay? byeeee
-Mirandaaaa
Nothing here... I have not written in here in like 26347124693 days. Not like it matters.. no one reads it or comments, but anyways it's for me to keep up with my life anyways. Well, okay so like a month ago Terry(I went out with him for a year)just decides to leave to go to Vicksburg(like two hours away)and tell me he's coming back.. But he never exactly came back... and he didn't call me.. So I had to call his dad's phone like 3547 times a day... and finally Terry calls me back and tells me he's confused...and he just needed to figure out what it was that was making him depressed. So, we talked for a few days and everything was okay.. and THEN I find out he came back to Meridian and didn't even call me or come over or nothing. Soooo, forget that.
I had started kinda missing Fernando(my ex - fiance).. anyways.. so now I believe me and Fernando are talking again. Fernando is in the Navy, and so right now he's on a ship right outside of Iraq.. so all I can do is email back and forth with him. He says that if I am still here like, talking to him and waiting on him whenever he gets back from Iraq, that he will come get me and move to Virginia to be with him. So, I'm very* happy about that. I asked him if he'd be upset or anything if it took me a little while to get used to him again, and he said that that would be fine.. yanno.. He's the sweetest guy.
I'm just kinda scared to try and get close to someone again.. because I thought I knew everything about Terry.. I thought I knew what he was thinking, why he was happy/sad/mad/whatever.. and then it just so happens I apparently know absolutely nothing about him. And that hurt really bad that he could just LEAVE me like that.. and not even think twice about it. ;/ I'm kinda scared of relationships now because I've never been hurt like that. I mean, Fernando wouldn't hurt me like that. I've basically BEEN with him for four years.. but, then again.. - I didn't think Terry would, either.
*shrugs* it's just a big mess. Also I have no job anymore. I was working at O'Charley's (a restauraunt), but I just had enough of the GM up there, and I thought I was moving to Vicksburg with Terry anyways... so I quit. And I STILL haven't found a job. No one will call me back. I call people I've already talked to and filled out applications for, and the positions have already been filled. It just sucks. ;[* I'm not getting hardly CRAP back from taxes.. BLEH~!@!# I've been hanging out with an old friend, John, and his two year old baby girl Jody for the past few days. He likes me, I think.. he's just so sweet and he's very considerate... I just don't think I could really be in a relationship with him. I'm trying to get my life straight(with Fernando, kinda). I have to be sure that I am okay by myself first... then think about relationships.
But, I KNOW I am in love with Fernando. There is no question about it. I have loved that boy ever since I began 9th grade.. and now I'm out of high school, and I still feel exactly the same for him as I used to. It's just been like a year since I have seen him and gotten to hang out with him, because last year I was engaged to him. So, I don't know how we'll act together now. We've both changed... and we just have to figure out a way to work together. <3 I love him..wow.
Anyways - so I am watching Cram, and about to get offline and play Skip Bo.. So, I'll try and remember to update later okay? byeeee
-Mirandaaaa