Over a Decade - Long Post is Long
The first decade of the new millennium. Cool, huh? Let's look backwards in order to enjoy going forward.
1.- Who were you in 2000? How old were you? What were you doing?
2.- Have you met people that changed your life during the last ten years?
3.- Are you still in contact with/see them?
4.- What were your dreams in 2000?
5.- Did you accomplish them?
6.- What are your dreams now?
7.- What did you learn in the last ten years?
8.- What do you see yourself doing in 2020?
9.- Do you have any regrets from the last ten years?
10.- Ten things you MUST have done by 2020.
1.- I was 16, studying 2º Medio (something like first year in highschool) in 2000, and I must admit I hated my life. I was depressed and a complete mess. I didn't actually know what was so wrong in my life at the time, nor why I was so sad. I think the year 2000 was the year I started to contemplate suicide. It would only be two years later that I attempted it (now I'm not afraid to admit it) as you can all imagine, I failed, big time, but I don't regret it.I was no one, I had nothing to do, nowhere to go... It was an awfull time to be Ran.
2.- Of course I met wonderful people in the last ten years, all the lovely ñoñas, for once, and I must say, I finally met my Dad and Juan Pablo, my therapist, they all saved me, in a way. Lira, Pamela, Yazmin, are my thriumvirate (sp?) of doom, they helped me reconcile with my gender, my nerdiness and all the things I loved but was too embarrassed to admit. Clow who taught me how to be tough and to stop waiting for things to happen. Lobito-san, Gaby, Patty and Aurelie-chan too, they showed me I was actually good at something and that people can love just because, I love them all to pieces.
3.- Thanks god I still see most of them (Juan Pablo not included, sorry) Now they've all become my best friends and people I would die without. I love them all so much.
4.- My dreams at 16 were very simple, I wanted to graduate from school and to be a translator or a teacher, (and Napoleon's wife, I will always carry a torch for that man) I wanted to be able to buy my own books and comicbooks and to live a relatively secluded and relaxing life.
5.- I accomplished most of those dreams. I got out of school and studied translation. I learned a lot and finally got a job of my own. Real life was not as secluded and relaxing as I imagined it would be, but I can't complain, it is a relief.
6.- My current dreams are mostly the same, I want to work as a translator (see? Real Life again) and live abroad. I want to be stable, and I don't want to feel as desperate and alone as I did ten years ago.
7.- I learned that it was ok for me to be a girl, that color and music and laughter were not really a bad thing and that I could actually cry when I felt upset instead of showing this annoyingly stoic face I had crafted for myself. I learned that I shouldn't be ashamed of myself, that I might be weird, but I am also someone quite fun to be around (or so people say) and that while not everyone will like me, it doesn't mean I am a bad person. I learned that while friendship might last forever, sometimes the world will interefere, and if those friends you really love remain in your heart, they might come back into your life for real, and that some people won't just get bored of you and leave you alone. Looking at the wonderful friends I've made and feeling they actually want to be by my side, despite the years, the good and the bad, makes me appreciate them all the more.
I also learned I could actually be jealous of people, that it was ok to be selfish for a while and pout and say: "I know you like this or that person, but for a while I was jealous, I don't like sharing you that much" and that people that really love me will understand and not freak out. It was a wonderful feeling.
Finally, I learned that there is never really a villian in every story, most people are not bad, just... different from what you expected, and that you cannot control that (no matter how hard you try) XD.
8.- By 2020 I hope I will be living abroad, have a kid (either my little Octavian or Amelia and no, I'm not changing those names) and maybe, just maybe, a husband, if not, that's ok too. I also want to have another dog (I'm realistic now and I know Yuki Eiri won't be alive in ten years)
My dreams are really simple, right now. No fame nor fortune, just stability and happiness (although I think they are harder to get than fame and fortune these days :P)
9.- I regret many things, actually. I regret I didn't get help sooner, that I was too afraid to reach out when I needed it the most. That I let too many people walk all over me and that I never stood up for myself. That it took me ten long years to finally look and myself and see something I like (but I would still change a little). I regret I wasn't there when people needed me, or that I was too oblivious to notice them until it was too late. I regret there is a part of me that is still weak and needy and longs for the acceptance of people I now know doesn't really deserve my love. I happens until now and I hope it will have stopped in ten years.
10.-
1- I will have gone back to Barcelona, or in any case London or New York.
2.- I will get a bicycle.
3.- I will have a son/daughter (husband not part of the deal, most likely)
4.- I will finish writting Prodigy (and save Andrés' life XD)
5.- Lira and I will go to Italy and she will actually be there to translate when hot Italian guys are hitting on me for once XD(and most likely she will whack me on the head when I don't get it)
6.- I will study a second degree, this time something to do with education or.. I dun know literature, something fun.
7.- I will re-learn how to play the piano.
8.- I will learn a third language... most likely french or german.
9.- I will have made peace with all the people I can't forget nor forgive.
10.- I WILL GO TO BUENOS AIRES, EITHER WITH DAD (keep dreaming, idiot) OR BY MYSELF!! ;^;9
I'm a fucking emo of doom. XD It's been a good ten years, I realize now. And I can only hope the next ten are even better.
1.- Who were you in 2000? How old were you? What were you doing?
2.- Have you met people that changed your life during the last ten years?
3.- Are you still in contact with/see them?
4.- What were your dreams in 2000?
5.- Did you accomplish them?
6.- What are your dreams now?
7.- What did you learn in the last ten years?
8.- What do you see yourself doing in 2020?
9.- Do you have any regrets from the last ten years?
10.- Ten things you MUST have done by 2020.
1.- I was 16, studying 2º Medio (something like first year in highschool) in 2000, and I must admit I hated my life. I was depressed and a complete mess. I didn't actually know what was so wrong in my life at the time, nor why I was so sad. I think the year 2000 was the year I started to contemplate suicide. It would only be two years later that I attempted it (now I'm not afraid to admit it) as you can all imagine, I failed, big time, but I don't regret it.I was no one, I had nothing to do, nowhere to go... It was an awfull time to be Ran.
2.- Of course I met wonderful people in the last ten years, all the lovely ñoñas, for once, and I must say, I finally met my Dad and Juan Pablo, my therapist, they all saved me, in a way. Lira, Pamela, Yazmin, are my thriumvirate (sp?) of doom, they helped me reconcile with my gender, my nerdiness and all the things I loved but was too embarrassed to admit. Clow who taught me how to be tough and to stop waiting for things to happen. Lobito-san, Gaby, Patty and Aurelie-chan too, they showed me I was actually good at something and that people can love just because, I love them all to pieces.
3.- Thanks god I still see most of them (Juan Pablo not included, sorry) Now they've all become my best friends and people I would die without. I love them all so much.
4.- My dreams at 16 were very simple, I wanted to graduate from school and to be a translator or a teacher, (and Napoleon's wife, I will always carry a torch for that man) I wanted to be able to buy my own books and comicbooks and to live a relatively secluded and relaxing life.
5.- I accomplished most of those dreams. I got out of school and studied translation. I learned a lot and finally got a job of my own. Real life was not as secluded and relaxing as I imagined it would be, but I can't complain, it is a relief.
6.- My current dreams are mostly the same, I want to work as a translator (see? Real Life again) and live abroad. I want to be stable, and I don't want to feel as desperate and alone as I did ten years ago.
7.- I learned that it was ok for me to be a girl, that color and music and laughter were not really a bad thing and that I could actually cry when I felt upset instead of showing this annoyingly stoic face I had crafted for myself. I learned that I shouldn't be ashamed of myself, that I might be weird, but I am also someone quite fun to be around (or so people say) and that while not everyone will like me, it doesn't mean I am a bad person. I learned that while friendship might last forever, sometimes the world will interefere, and if those friends you really love remain in your heart, they might come back into your life for real, and that some people won't just get bored of you and leave you alone. Looking at the wonderful friends I've made and feeling they actually want to be by my side, despite the years, the good and the bad, makes me appreciate them all the more.
I also learned I could actually be jealous of people, that it was ok to be selfish for a while and pout and say: "I know you like this or that person, but for a while I was jealous, I don't like sharing you that much" and that people that really love me will understand and not freak out. It was a wonderful feeling.
Finally, I learned that there is never really a villian in every story, most people are not bad, just... different from what you expected, and that you cannot control that (no matter how hard you try) XD.
8.- By 2020 I hope I will be living abroad, have a kid (either my little Octavian or Amelia and no, I'm not changing those names) and maybe, just maybe, a husband, if not, that's ok too. I also want to have another dog (I'm realistic now and I know Yuki Eiri won't be alive in ten years)
My dreams are really simple, right now. No fame nor fortune, just stability and happiness (although I think they are harder to get than fame and fortune these days :P)
9.- I regret many things, actually. I regret I didn't get help sooner, that I was too afraid to reach out when I needed it the most. That I let too many people walk all over me and that I never stood up for myself. That it took me ten long years to finally look and myself and see something I like (but I would still change a little). I regret I wasn't there when people needed me, or that I was too oblivious to notice them until it was too late. I regret there is a part of me that is still weak and needy and longs for the acceptance of people I now know doesn't really deserve my love. I happens until now and I hope it will have stopped in ten years.
10.-
1- I will have gone back to Barcelona, or in any case London or New York.
2.- I will get a bicycle.
3.- I will have a son/daughter (husband not part of the deal, most likely)
4.- I will finish writting Prodigy (and save Andrés' life XD)
5.- Lira and I will go to Italy and she will actually be there to translate when hot Italian guys are hitting on me for once XD(and most likely she will whack me on the head when I don't get it)
6.- I will study a second degree, this time something to do with education or.. I dun know literature, something fun.
7.- I will re-learn how to play the piano.
8.- I will learn a third language... most likely french or german.
9.- I will have made peace with all the people I can't forget nor forgive.
10.- I WILL GO TO BUENOS AIRES, EITHER WITH DAD (keep dreaming, idiot) OR BY MYSELF!! ;^;9
I'm a fucking emo of doom. XD It's been a good ten years, I realize now. And I can only hope the next ten are even better.