ramy goes to college
So, I no longer feel so small and meek. In fact, I'm feeling much, much better -- just as I figured I would. But feeling better about my new surroundings does not necessarily mean I've adjusted to them. I still feel somewhat... lost.
And it's not a bad thing. In fact, given the fact that I should be spending the next four years of my life in these same surroundings, with these same people, I figure it's probably better if I take some time to adjust instead of simply rushing into things -- rushing into social situations, rushing into relationships, rushing into... frat parties (not that I really plan on attending them in the future, anyway). I told both Carianne and Shivani (one face-to-face, the other via AIM) earlier today how much I missed my room back home because it was my secure place, and how I was hoping to find, over the course of the next few weeks, somewhere here at UVa -- if not my dorm room, than a lounge or library or bench -- where I can study and relax and just feel... content.
And I know I'll find somewhere -- somewhere all my own -- as the buildings around me slowly take shape into my new home, as the people around me -- love them, hate them, or well, hate them -- slowly take shape into some strange and disjointed but at times united community.
And not only will my surroundings change, but I will change too, most probably with them. I could feel it happening a night or two ago -- I could feel the various corks and screws and nuts and bolts of my insides slowly changing and transforming and shifting and turning.
I left Marshall thinking I knew who I was -- and it's true, I did know who I was. But I knew myself relative to Marshall, relative to the people and places I had already come to know. And I figure that, as both my surroundings and myself slowly change, I'll discover who I am relative to UVa and to Charlottesville. A new form of myself, if that makes any sense.
And so, a week after that infamous day when the worlds of the first-years' collided, I find myself much more satisfied with the position I'm in. I'm no longer so small and so meek.
Ramy
PS -- On a lighter, much more superficial note, I'm so sick of effin' guys here who wear long-sleeved collared shirts and ties with shorts and flip-flops. Either dress up or don't dress up, but please don't do either halfway. You look like jerks.
You probably are jerks.
And to think there could be something worse than the popped collar.
And it's not a bad thing. In fact, given the fact that I should be spending the next four years of my life in these same surroundings, with these same people, I figure it's probably better if I take some time to adjust instead of simply rushing into things -- rushing into social situations, rushing into relationships, rushing into... frat parties (not that I really plan on attending them in the future, anyway). I told both Carianne and Shivani (one face-to-face, the other via AIM) earlier today how much I missed my room back home because it was my secure place, and how I was hoping to find, over the course of the next few weeks, somewhere here at UVa -- if not my dorm room, than a lounge or library or bench -- where I can study and relax and just feel... content.
And I know I'll find somewhere -- somewhere all my own -- as the buildings around me slowly take shape into my new home, as the people around me -- love them, hate them, or well, hate them -- slowly take shape into some strange and disjointed but at times united community.
And not only will my surroundings change, but I will change too, most probably with them. I could feel it happening a night or two ago -- I could feel the various corks and screws and nuts and bolts of my insides slowly changing and transforming and shifting and turning.
I left Marshall thinking I knew who I was -- and it's true, I did know who I was. But I knew myself relative to Marshall, relative to the people and places I had already come to know. And I figure that, as both my surroundings and myself slowly change, I'll discover who I am relative to UVa and to Charlottesville. A new form of myself, if that makes any sense.
And so, a week after that infamous day when the worlds of the first-years' collided, I find myself much more satisfied with the position I'm in. I'm no longer so small and so meek.
Ramy
PS -- On a lighter, much more superficial note, I'm so sick of effin' guys here who wear long-sleeved collared shirts and ties with shorts and flip-flops. Either dress up or don't dress up, but please don't do either halfway. You look like jerks.
You probably are jerks.
And to think there could be something worse than the popped collar.