9:13 PM June 1, 2004
Its an ache behind my eyes, making my voice ornery, my movements wasteful, my grace non-existent. This feeling allows me very little capacity to do any things. It is such a strange feeling, yet I have become almost familiar with it. I think it is the beginnings of boredom.
I have been gaming. I keep track of how long I have been on the computer: 2and a half weeks, all day, the past few weeks. Yet these time frames are Potemkin masquerades - mere reflexes, vestiges of a structured life. I will be the first to admit that my eyes are blind to the passing of time.
But I did not mean to drown. If I had the strength, I would vow to never let these days fall into boredom. Lacking certainty in strength, I express these words as a fervent wish, ambiguous in its meaning but heartbreaking in tone. I believe I still have a heart to break.
I have been gaming. I keep track of how long I have been on the computer: 2and a half weeks, all day, the past few weeks. Yet these time frames are Potemkin masquerades - mere reflexes, vestiges of a structured life. I will be the first to admit that my eyes are blind to the passing of time.
But I did not mean to drown. If I had the strength, I would vow to never let these days fall into boredom. Lacking certainty in strength, I express these words as a fervent wish, ambiguous in its meaning but heartbreaking in tone. I believe I still have a heart to break.