(no subject)
My weekend was quite interesting, some parts were fun and happy and other times it was sad and depressing. Friday night I dressed up in a very sexy red dress, fish net stockings, black heels, black halo and wings. I not to sure what I was, or what I wanted to be. I stayed at home until about 8pm-ish I found out later that I barely missed the circus of kids and people coming over for my mom's birthday, I was surprised I didn't think many were gonna show. I first left for Laura B's place, there we talked and watch the movie Wrong Turn, I also showed her my computer. She even thought it was cool. Later on Mayvell, Jessica and their friend Doris showed up we didn't think they would. I left Laura's shortly after everybody else. I then drove down to Steve's for his small Halloween Party. It was pretty fun, there was some hard liquor for everyone there. Steve, Dave, and I were the ones who got the most drunk, before Jason that is. I had about 3 1/4 shots of Vodka, and 1 shot of tequila. I was gone in about half an hour. It was cool, at least I was feeling happier than I was before, of course that was my intention from the start. I didn't get home until about 3am, I past out as soon as my head hit my pillow.
Saturday the next morning I had to wake up early because I had to go take my SATs test. Thank God I didn't have a hangover or anything, I got pretty lucky or else testing would've been more hell than what they were. Going home after testing I began to feel extremely depressed, mainly because of the break. So much I actually considered not going to the LAN party anymore. But soon after I got over it and drove to Burlingame to set up my stuff and have gaming fun. I installed many things onto my computer, programs and games mostly. Unfortunately however, I didnt have much fun as I thought I would, but oh well. That night we watched the 1st and 2nd Matrix movies. By the time the 2nd one was finished I had to drive Kaidor and Steve back to their houses. Steve and I talked for a long time when I dropped him off, so much that I didn't get back to the warehouse until about 5:30 in the morning, but it's all good. When I got back I found Dave wrapped in my big thick warm blanket on the chair b/c all the other guys hogged all the mattresses. So we had to spread out my blanket on the cold hard cement floor and share my blanket, good thing it was big enough for both of us, except for Dave's poor frozen feet.
Later that Sunday morning I woke up around 10am to find out to my big surprise that everyone had left and that the LAN party was over!!! Only Dave, Chito, Robert and I were the one left, and we were left to clean up the giant mess everyone left behind as well. That pissed all of us off. After we got done cleaning as much as we could, Dave and I went to his place. There we set out both our computers and did more installing and playing. We played a few board games, watched a movie, and went for a walk in the rain. The walk brought up the conversation of us again and in the end Dave asked me out again...and I said yes.
But then Monday morning came around, and I woke up feeling very unhappy and felt that we probably didnt do the right thing. I felt so depressed about thinking all this and making sure that I would tell Dave asap, this also stressed me out a lot which why I broke down during 3rd period. Later that day in 6th period I spoke to him online. My hands and legs were trembling greatly, it was almost hard for me to type. He got very upset about everything I was saying. But before we could finish our conversation the bell rang and I had to leave. I called him right as soon as I got to a phone, we talked for a while more and in the end not only did he understand where I was coming from but he knew how I was feeling that whole day. So in the end, we broke up again, but this time it was much more mutual than anything. That day and Tuesday went by better for me b/c I knew we had decided the right thing for the both of us, continuing a relationship and this point would be unhealthy for the both of us emotionally we agreed. At least until we've gotten our responsibilites, priorities, and emotions straight and clear. And then we'll just see what happens from there. Tuesday evening I bought tickets for Dave, Steve, Chito and I to go see MATRIX REVOLUTIONS at 6am in Daly City.
Today, I woke up by the loud ear piercing beeping of my alarm. I woke up immediately and started to get ready to pick up Dave and Steve so go see the movie...this was around 4:25AM!!!! But the movie was SO worth it and SO AWESOME!!! Everyone MUST go see this movie!! It was the best out of the 3. It started at 6am and ended around 8:15, I was late to school only about 5 or 10 minutes so it was all good, and the rest of my school day was pretty boring. I fell asleep during one of the two same assemblies I had to attend. When I got home I began feeling sad and very lonely, most likely b/c today 11/5/03, would've been mine and Dave's 5th month, oh well I'm sure the feeling is just natural. I let Steve know how I was feeling and he invited me over to hang out with him for a while so I accepted, hanging out made me feel a bit better, Thanks Steve. So yeah, now I'm here sitting in front of my computer typing this....yeah. Okay well I guess there's nothing more for me to say. Buh Bye!! *muahs*
Love,
~Bernadette~
Saturday the next morning I had to wake up early because I had to go take my SATs test. Thank God I didn't have a hangover or anything, I got pretty lucky or else testing would've been more hell than what they were. Going home after testing I began to feel extremely depressed, mainly because of the break. So much I actually considered not going to the LAN party anymore. But soon after I got over it and drove to Burlingame to set up my stuff and have gaming fun. I installed many things onto my computer, programs and games mostly. Unfortunately however, I didnt have much fun as I thought I would, but oh well. That night we watched the 1st and 2nd Matrix movies. By the time the 2nd one was finished I had to drive Kaidor and Steve back to their houses. Steve and I talked for a long time when I dropped him off, so much that I didn't get back to the warehouse until about 5:30 in the morning, but it's all good. When I got back I found Dave wrapped in my big thick warm blanket on the chair b/c all the other guys hogged all the mattresses. So we had to spread out my blanket on the cold hard cement floor and share my blanket, good thing it was big enough for both of us, except for Dave's poor frozen feet.
Later that Sunday morning I woke up around 10am to find out to my big surprise that everyone had left and that the LAN party was over!!! Only Dave, Chito, Robert and I were the one left, and we were left to clean up the giant mess everyone left behind as well. That pissed all of us off. After we got done cleaning as much as we could, Dave and I went to his place. There we set out both our computers and did more installing and playing. We played a few board games, watched a movie, and went for a walk in the rain. The walk brought up the conversation of us again and in the end Dave asked me out again...and I said yes.
But then Monday morning came around, and I woke up feeling very unhappy and felt that we probably didnt do the right thing. I felt so depressed about thinking all this and making sure that I would tell Dave asap, this also stressed me out a lot which why I broke down during 3rd period. Later that day in 6th period I spoke to him online. My hands and legs were trembling greatly, it was almost hard for me to type. He got very upset about everything I was saying. But before we could finish our conversation the bell rang and I had to leave. I called him right as soon as I got to a phone, we talked for a while more and in the end not only did he understand where I was coming from but he knew how I was feeling that whole day. So in the end, we broke up again, but this time it was much more mutual than anything. That day and Tuesday went by better for me b/c I knew we had decided the right thing for the both of us, continuing a relationship and this point would be unhealthy for the both of us emotionally we agreed. At least until we've gotten our responsibilites, priorities, and emotions straight and clear. And then we'll just see what happens from there. Tuesday evening I bought tickets for Dave, Steve, Chito and I to go see MATRIX REVOLUTIONS at 6am in Daly City.
Today, I woke up by the loud ear piercing beeping of my alarm. I woke up immediately and started to get ready to pick up Dave and Steve so go see the movie...this was around 4:25AM!!!! But the movie was SO worth it and SO AWESOME!!! Everyone MUST go see this movie!! It was the best out of the 3. It started at 6am and ended around 8:15, I was late to school only about 5 or 10 minutes so it was all good, and the rest of my school day was pretty boring. I fell asleep during one of the two same assemblies I had to attend. When I got home I began feeling sad and very lonely, most likely b/c today 11/5/03, would've been mine and Dave's 5th month, oh well I'm sure the feeling is just natural. I let Steve know how I was feeling and he invited me over to hang out with him for a while so I accepted, hanging out made me feel a bit better, Thanks Steve. So yeah, now I'm here sitting in front of my computer typing this....yeah. Okay well I guess there's nothing more for me to say. Buh Bye!! *muahs*
Love,
~Bernadette~