(no subject)
Listening to: Kill Hannah - The Chase
Reading: Nothing, at the moment
Watching: Gilmore Girls
Creeped out by: the Sawney Bean clan.
As I currently can't be assed with youtube, my fave vids are gonna have to wait.
Right now, I'm going to ramble on a bit, as the title of this blog would suggest.
The last few days have been filled with end-of-exams relief, warm weather, dresses, Glasgow, Edinburgh, and delicious frappucinos.
Firstly, a word on Edinburgh...
I love Scotland. I love the scenery, the history, and - occasionally- the weather.
Glasgow is pretty awesome, too.
But last week, I spent the day in Edinburgh, our beautiful Capital, and I was amazed that within the gorgeous old buildings, and it's interesting history; Edinburgh has become a fucking TOURIST TRAP.
Basically it's filled with Americans (no offence if you are American, it's just an observation I made), who made some pot-fuelled desicion to go into a tartan outifitters, wear traditional tartan dress, and get their picture taken in front of the rest of the store. WHY?
Jeez. Plus, the Royal Mile reminded me somewhat of Paris: tiny shops filled with pointless souvineers (though aren't most souvineers pointless?), and awful looking "I <3 SCOTLAND!" t-shirts.
Ew.
And Edinburgers think they're better than Glaswegians.
Yeah, Glaswegians may have murders every night, (but a less bloody history than Edinburgh), and there may be a shocking amount of sectarianism displayed on the streets, and some of us may speak like little, uneducated dicks (that's true), but at least we don't try and pretend we're super-cultured. And we have WAY better shops than you motherfuckers.
2nd best city in Europe for retail, I'll have you know.
And the biggest disco ball in Europe.
And the biggest city in the world.
And the highest murder rates EVER, which also means you're most likely to die in Glasgow than anywhere else in the world (having said that, I think it's an acheivment to survive this long...).
Not that any of that matters.
Anyway, one highlight of Edinburgh was a terrifying trip to the Edinburgh Dungeons.
Funny, how there are no actual dungeons in Edinburgh :P
But, after getting a cheesy picture taken of me holding an axe and being told to scream - to which I replied "ah" - and then into a "courtroom" and then a "torture chamber" and a seriously twisted boat-trip that was in pitch-black, with creepy children talking, and then a sudden stop, and we find ourselves in "Sawney Beans cave".
This was SO fucked up.
Basically, the Sawney Bean Clan was this family that lived hundreds of years ago in a cave in Galloway, where the head of the family Alexander "Sawney" Bean and his wife created a family of 46 kids and grandkids (did I mention that this was an incesteous family?) killed and ate over a thousand people in the space of 25 years.
That is, until one day, one of their "hunting" trips didn't go as planned, and ended with a man, after watching his girlfriend/wife being killed, manging to fight them of, going to the police, and having King George VI send 400 men out to capture them.
Then the men were killed in some grisly way while the women and children watched.
Then they were burned.
Yep. I'm now messed up for fucking life, you d-bags.
Fuck you.
Sorry for going on.
And no offence, Edinburgh.
You still rock.
Just not as hard as Glasgow.
After all, why didn't the Sex Pistols play there in their tour in 2007?
xo xo