The Telling of One Billion Ghost Stories (draft) - Part 23

[rallamajoop]

A week and a half late on this chapter - oh man, I was not counting on this taking so long. >.> I've had a pretty good run on this story so far, but this chapter kicked my arse - which I was expecting, but not quite on this scale. This would be what happens when you finally get to scenes you've been building towards for pretty much the whole damn

Comments

[rallamajoop]

^_^ Thanks, it is a real relief to be hearing people think I did this part of the story justice. So much build up and so many high reader expectations, and here's me with embarrassingly little practice writing serious romance scenes. Of course, on the same logic probably a lot of readers wouldn't care so much how the scene comes out as long as there's boykissing at the end of it, but relying on that to carry the scene would be cheating.

...we and Doumeki do need to be reminded that a part of him is still waiting for the other shoe to drop while hoping desperitly that it won't do too much damage when it does.

Oh yes, well put and still so very, very true.

I also really enjoyed the Doumeki and Kurogane interaction, it is so much fun to see how 2 people who have not interacted in cannon would behave, and I think you manage it very well indeed.

And it's hugely gratifying to hear that part stood out too, because that whole section of this chapter actually took me more work and rewriting than the final scene did. Mostly, getting the characters to interact has been surprisingly easy - the whole camp dynamic just fell right into place at the start. But with this part, getting two characters who both talk so little and who needed to be able to say so much to each other in that conversation with so few words - it took me forever to figure out quite how to approach that part so that it would work.

because he realizes how much control he has, Doumeki would be even more careful not to abuse it (at least that's what I think).

And I would say you're right. The relationship is badly unbalanced in that Watanuki needs Doumeki so much more than the reverse, and Doumeki does need to understand that if it's going to work at all. Fortunately, he's not the kind to be daunted by that, and should be capable of handling it just fine.

And please keep updating the drafts, I look foward to them very much (though if some weeks take longer I really don't mind becasue I know its worth the wait).

Very glad to hear it, though your comments have already gone a long way to keeping me going in the last couple of chapters as it is. ^^; Thanks again for all your encouragement (and your patience with slow chapter weeks as well).

[ldydragon7]

Very glad to hear it, though your comments have already gone a long way to keeping me going in the last couple of chapters as it is. ^^; Thanks again for all your encouragement (and your patience with slow chapter weeks as well).

Really? I'm so glad to hear that. :D