Chapter 5... after a good two years!
I am SO proud of myself right now - I just finished chapter five of my beloved young!Snape fic. This was a very hard chapter and I had a LOT of problems with... but it's actually turned out to be one of my favourite chapters so far. It's a lot longer than the other ones.
Feel free to have a look-see, comments are so much love so I would love it if you gave me some feedback. I'm going to find a few sites to post this on so if there's anything specific you like/think I could improve, I urge you to tell me - sexual favours for your troubles?
Oh and I can't really be bothered linking to the other chapters right now... I'll see if I can bothered when I post chapter 6 ;)
Title: The Pureblood Prince
Chapter Title: Serpent and Eagle
Chapter: 5/?
Word count: 3 712
Type: Angst/Gen
Rating: R
Warnings: Sexual allusions - not graphic.
Disclaimer: All characters, with a couple of exceptions, belong to J.K. Rowling.
CHAPTER V: Serpent and Eagle
“I’m sorry!”
“No you’re not, you little bitch! You do this to deliberately worry your mother and me! Gallivanting about outside with Muggles… are you incapable of processing how reprehensible and dishonourable that is?!”
“They were nice to me! I was only playing hop-scotch -“
“PLAYING THEIR MUGGLE GAMES! You have shamed your family!”
“I- father- I’m -I LIKED them! They talked to me -“
A hand swiftly came into harsh contact with Eileen’s face.
“Atticus! Stop that at once!”
The grey-haired man turned towards the door. Between the frames stood an equally impressive woman much younger than he, she was clothed in green robes and looking livid.
“Want to know what your precious daughter has been doing, Serafina?” Atticus spat, turning Eileen violently to face her concerned mother, “tell her darling! Tell your mother and make her see what you really are and prove wrong the lies she uses to protect you - go on!”
“I don’t care what she did, you are NEVER to lay a hand on her like that again!” countered Serafina Prince viciously, pulling her daughter towards her and bringing her into a shielding embrace amongst her arms. Atticus threw a long, pale finger in the air.
“This isn’t over, Eileen” he warned. “One day you’ll understand why WE do not mix with THEM - and you’ll come running to us, and you’ll be sorry, Merlin knows your mother will cave in to your idiocy but I…” He did not finish his sentence. With one piercing glare at mother and daughter Atticus stormed away from the scene, slamming the door behind him in his closing dramatic act.
“I’ll never be sorry!” Eileen cried. She turned towards her mother and buried her head into her belly, her body shaking with exhaustion and distress. Serafina bent to kiss her black hair; she wrapped her arms around her terrified child and rocked her. And suddenly, all was right with the world.
“Shhhh, shhh, shhh” Serafina whispered soothingly. “There’s no need to be scared, little one” she dropped into a chair with the weeping little girl on her lap. “Mummy’s here… mummy will look after you…”
“B-b-ut why doesn’t he want me to have friends mummy? Why?”
Serafina tightened her embrace.
“Eileen, you are a smart girl! If I’ve taught you anything it’s that you should think for yourself. Your father learnt many years ago that I am more than adept of giving as good as I got… you just need to prove yourself capable, and he’ll shut his fat prehistoric mouth up.”
Eileen managed a small giggle, and she saw a smirk playing around her mother’s porcelain features.
“Mummy, you shouldn’t talk about daddy that way!”
Secretly, Eileen had always been so deeply in awe of her mother. The way she held herself, the way she smirked, the way she spoke… without restraint, without fear, with such fire and honesty. Eileen could only dream of such freedom. It must have felt good to be her.
“And daddy shouldn’t talk to you the way he did,” her mother quickly added, her tone suddenly more serious.
Eileen sat herself up upon Serafina’s lap, looking defiantly into her black eyes, “no he shouldn’t! I’m like you mummy, I’m not stupid, I’m a witch and they’re Muggles! I can protect myself against Muggles ‘cause I have a wand and magic and they don’t!” she puffed out her chest proudly, desperately trying to become every inch her mother, who, it appeared, believed every word she said.
“That is very true, Eileen. You are such a strong girl...” She drew her back into a loving embrace and kissed her forehead adoringly.
“You are my girl.”
~
Days ran into weeks, mild study ran into hours upon hours of frantically scribbling notes down in the library, the workload was getting fuller as term progressed and Severus gladly welcomed the challenge. At least now he had a proper excuse to avoid the unnecessary banter of his fellow Slytherins as they all sat around in the common room late into the night. The only topic of which he was remotely interested was of the alumni of Slytherin house, his old group of ‘friends’, and their activities of late. Severus ached for the day in which he himself could join them - there seemed undeniable stagnancy in studying for tests and practicing useless charms at Hogwarts, while Lucius and others were actively making something of themselves. Granted, his old friends had been out of Hogwarts for some years now, but Severus could never get over the envy of hearing their impressive tales, and imagining and dreaming of himself in a similar role. For now he would have to bide his time and learn above and beyond what he needed to succeed spectacularly.
The tales of He Who Must Not Be Named and his Death Eaters were now rife within the entire school. Oh, those idiot Gryffindors would scorn and the silly sentimental Hufflepuffs would gossip, but there was no doubt of the fascination it created amongst many of Severus’s peers. Severus would sometimes stay up all night reading or listening about them. It seemed a life in which Severus could only dream of, of such power and respect. Power that he had never possessed before, despite his superior knowledge and intellect on most subjects of wizardry, despite the numerous amount spells and potions that he, himself, had invented! Something his fellow students and even most teachers and the most skilled wizard or witch could never in their life manage to accomplish! And still, still he lacked the respect from them - from everyone. But this… this was a way out… this was a future he deserved.
Most days Severus sat in the library alone; rarely did Regulus ever accompany him to such places save for looming assignments and exams. Some days he would attempt to be sociable and gather under the shady protection of the trees with his small group of seventh year Slytherins (in order to discover the latest information from the outside world), but usually he preferred the solitude and ability to think clearly without interruption; this was such a day. He sat in a dingy corner at the very back of the library, avoiding Madam Pince - the vulture-incarnate librarian - at all costs, flicking through numerous charms and potions and historical books lazily. He had no need for such an activity, but truth be told he hadn’t much want to do anything else. A few Slytherins, sixth years by the looks of them, sat in front of a big arches window to the corner, busily studying for some sort of Potions test by the looks of their books. Severus eyed them for a while, and wished they would stop turning the pages so damned loudly.
“Oh, we haven’t even started properties of Calming Draught!” cried one of the girls. Her friend, whom Severus recognised from the start of term feast, gave her a small push of warning - but this was a futile gesture.
“Silence!” came the painfully expected shrill of Pince, who had been stalking the bookshelves behind the group.
They immediately lowered the tone of their voices to an almost inaudible whisper. And for some reason, this irritated Severus even more. He started to pack away his books into his ancient looking bag, torn and sagging from the endless weight thrust into them over the course of seven years, and promptly made his way out of the library with the intention of locking himself away in the Slytherin common room. It was on the way there, however, that he came across a rather unpleasant sight.
“Sirius, I’m TELLING you it works!”
“Yeah, you keep saying that mate. I need some proof before I believe some of the shit you’re coming up with!”
“Alright - show you right now if you want! Come on then!”
James Potter and his gang of brutes may have been heading away from the entrance to the library, where Severus stood, but their voices carried far enough to wake the Giants in the highlands. Curious, Severus silently slinked behind a stone pillar and watched them assemble under one of the bigger trees of the courtyard in front of him. James raised his wand at the base of the tree.
“S-“
“James!” one of the boys suddenly interjected. Severus tilted himself further away from the pillar to see him, it was Remus Lupin, one of the more mild-mannered of the lot - if not still completely irritating; James lowered his wand and turned to speak with him, their voices too inaudible for Severus to make out.
With a quiet curse towards all the nattering voices who drowned out what precious information he could get from Potter, Severus decided to head back to the dormitory before dinner arrived. There was special business to attend to.
~
“You… what…?”
“I’m moving.”
“Yes, child, that I understand. But… him?”
“HE loves me!”
“HE is a Muggle!”
“You sound exactly like father! I suppose you don’t believe that I can take care of myself like you used to? Or is that I spit in the face of the precious little pure-blood fantasy you invented for me?!”
“Oh you are being so very naïve! Do you honestly think a Muggle man will understand you like a wizard would? Will be able to support you the way a wizard could?”
“Magic doesn’t matter to me anymore mother. You may have married father for power and wealth, but I’m not about to make the same mistake as you.”
“Mistake, you say? I’d prefer you to not make judgements on my choices, child! I am happily secured thanks to the match I made. If I had married for anything less… THAT I would consider a failure on my part. This, this family, the PRINCE family, is what I knew I deserved. Your father was simply the key.”
“And Tobias Snape is what I deserve. There is no discrepancy - save I’ll be with the man I love and you’ll be alone in a big house with an old and violent dogmatist!”
“Ah, I can see now why you were never followed the rest of your family into Slytherin. You have no pride in yourself or your abilities. You certainly have no ambition…”
“Yes, we all know how disappointed you must be in me mother! Only the crème de la crème can belong to your precious Slytherin… blight the Ravenclaw for breaking the chain of prejudice, right?”
“… you haven’t even told him, have you Eileen?”
“I don’t care about magic anymore, mother. If I have to give up this whole world for him, I’ll do it. I shall have nothing to tell him.”
“Idiot girl! Do you not understand that modesty and humility have no place within womankind? We cannot AFFORD it Eileen! You are throwing everything I’ve worked for right out of the window by running off with this filthy Muggle!”
“DON’T YOU TALK ABOUT TOBIAS LIKE THAT!”
“I and your father can do whatever we like in our own house! He is filthy Muggle brute who took away the good sense of my only daughter, my young and strong Ravenclaw, and until you come to your senses you are no longer welcome here!”
Without another word, without so much as an angry glare, the Ravenclaw lifted her head high and vanished from her mother’s sights and thoughts.
For the first time since her baby’s birth… Serafina Prince wept.
~
Severus was becoming frantic. He had hoped to spend the few hours before dinner perfecting the precious spells he kept safe within his mothers old potions textbook, his spells, his inventions, the pride and joy of all he had accomplished at Hogwarts. There was only one minor hurdle to this: the book was not there.
Stupid bastard! He cursed inwardly at himself. All the years he had protected this book with his life; he hardly let it out of his grasp! And as much as he wracked his brains to remember just exactly what he had done with it, he constantly kept coming to the same conclusion… it had been in his bag. He had not used it in a couple of days but it had stayed there, safe and hidden from moronic eyes.
With a frustrated sigh, Severus punched the pillow and fell back onto his bunk. He was not in the mood for dinner now. Besides, it could give him more precious time to search for his beloved book without being discovered by Regulus or any of the other Slytherin seventh year boys. He had often skipped meals to give himself the precious alone time he so dearly desired… he inwardly shuddered at the nightly reminders here that he was, indeed, not alone here. No, Severus would never in wildest dreams have allowed the boys, anyone, to hear him doing… that. Apparently the others did not have such a high sense of dignity as he.
The prospect of being alone for at least an hour, however, enticed him, urged him. The book could not have gotten far, anyway, and only the stupidest of fools would not have transcribed the inventions into another notebook - unfortunately, said notebook was bolted away in a drawer at Spinners End, with numerous charms and magical curses placed on the lock. Severus could not think clearly on such a fraught mind… and he could not take his mind off the problem enough to wholly relieve himself - faintly pleasing as it presently was.
Vicious circle.
To his satisfaction, his persistent mind began to relent. Firstly shifting between thoughts of the potions book and how vital it was that he find it before one of the teachers did, to the all-too-familiar sensation of his experienced hand. It didn’t take long… he had long since become adept at taking the shortest amount of time possible, else risk being interrupted. He never did this for sheer pleasure, after all - it was simply a means to quench even a slight portion of his frustration.
Feeling a great sense of new-founded clarity, Severus allowed himself a very brief moment to relax, as he always did. It was the only time he did. A passing moment where there was nothing to think about, a time to clear ones minds without the strain of actively trying to shutdown. Now the burden had been somewhat lifted, Severus cleaned himself up, and was about to head off to the bathroom when he heard noises coming form the Slytherin common room below.
Blast, why did they have to come back so early?
With snake-like reflexes, Severus had managed to hurl all of his books back into his chest and tidy his bed before heading to the landing to see who had decided to skive off dinner early. He needn’t have bothered, however, when he came face to face with Regulus in the arch of the doorway.
“Was wondering where you were,” came Regulus’ swift comment.
“Wasn’t hungry,” Severus mumbled, “had some Astronomy study I wanted to catch up on… you ate awfully fast?”
He was surprised at just how annoyed he was at Regulus for this.
Regulus pushed his away past his fellow Slytherin and slumped down onto Severus’s bunk.
“Yeah, well, if you had to eat around your idiot Mudblood-loving Gryffindor brother I’m sure you’d lose your appetite some time or another!”
Severus leant against one of the bedposts casually and crossed his arms.
“I’d have thought you’d be revelling in the fact that he’s a destitute, homeless decrepit now, Regulus? I know I am.”
“Hardly!” Regulus shot back, violently pulling off his shoes (Severus frowned- could he have not done that in his own dormitory?). “I overheard them coming into the Great Hall this evening. He’s at that Potter’s house! Can you believe that? The bastard has no remorse for what he did to our family whatsoever! Burning him off our tapestry was something he probably wanted, what kind of punishment is that to him?”
With an extremely amused smirk, Severus walked around to face his so-called “friend”.
“If you’re saying you want to teach your oaf of a brother a certain ‘lesson’ before we all graduate, then you have me at your service…”
“… you know the kind of lesson we’re going to teach them, Severus. After graduating.”
The breathtaking image began to trickle into Severus’s mind… him, Severus Snape, standing cloaked, an expressionless mask, his wand raised… vengeance extracted. How powerful he would be! How his father would curse the day he had ever turned on his wizard son and pureblood wife.
It was then that Severus decided to divulge in Regulus something that only he and one other person in the world knew…
“Listen carefully to this, Regulus,” he started, leaning in as to avoid being overheard by the other few voices now appearing in the direction of the common room. “I have, over the years, developed a few… inventions… that may prove useful if I were to make my way into their circle.”
“Inventions?”
“Spells, potions, curses…”
“… you? Fuck off.”
“Where did you think all my knowledge of curses came from? I didn’t read up on them all in the restricted section, did I?”
Regulus shook his head - both stunned and slightly agitated. “Stop being a prick, Severus! You’re seventeen. Sure, my parents have taught me loads of curses over the years, what kind of family doesn’t? But even they couldn’t invent their own!”
Severus felt a stab of pride.
“Believe what you will, Regulus, but nevertheless, I have a few curses that may prove useful to you in impressing that… family of yours… and even the Dark Lord himself, if you are willing to give me something in return.”
Regulus snorted, looking Severus up and down. “You know, if you really wanted money Severus, you needn’t offer made-up inventions for-”
Without a seconds thought, Severus’s hand had snapped out to clasp Regulus Black’s collar. He pulled him towards his face, etched with sudden anger and hostility.
“I want none of your blasted money, do you hear?! I have survived seventeen years without so much as a galleon in the bank and I’m still a more powerful wizard than all seventh years combined! Do not make me out to be some poor charity case in need, Regulus, or I assure you - you will regret it.”
“Alright! Alight!” Regulus replies, pushing Severus’s hand away from him. “Don’t be so bloody touchy all the time! What IS it that you want?”
“I want information.”
“What kind of information?”
“I want to know all the pureblood families connections.”
“You mean a tapestry?”
Severus rolled his eyes. He knew there would have to be some explaining to do. “Not just a tapestry… I want all the information you possess on pureblood ancestry.”
“Can’t you just ask your parents about that?”
Ha!
“My mother… doesn’t agree with such things.” Severus mumbled back. Were they all so inbred that they failed to notice the most “noble” House of Snape would be the last name to ever appear on their ridiculous tapestries? “She was barred long ago from her good name and sizeable inheritance by my grandparents. My father no longer permits contact with them, and it is my mothers wish that I adhere to what he says.”
No matter how nonsensical it must look to have a Muggle tell a witch whom she can and cannot speak to.
“So what about your fathers side-?”
“We are going around in circles here Regulus,” Severus quickly interrupted, else be forced to make up some fast and possibly very incriminating lies. “All I want is that. I want nothing more than that information… if I am to leave here and follow Lucius Malfoy into that circle, I need to know that vital history on bloodlines, -else it be my undoing. In return I shall give you your pick of my curses to impress the Dark Lord with when it is your turn to join us.”
“One curse?”
“Just one.” Severus was indeed too proud and protective over his work to be giving them away in such a fashion... but Regulus was the key to a vast knowledge of Wizarding ancestry, knowledge he knew his own mother would never give him.
“Alright then. Give me the curse and I’ll let you visit Grimmauld Place over the summer, good enough?”
“Good enough. I’ll teach it to you over the next few weeks.”
“Fine. I’ll be off then.” Regulus nodded his goodbye to Severus, leaving the latter standing alone, once again, in the middle of dormitory.
Severus could not help but feel an overwhelming sensation of disappointment in himself. Out of all the purebloods he had come into contact with, he knew he was infinitely more talented and powerful than they were. It was something he always prided himself on - something he wished he could rub in the face of all those pureblood maniacs. The half-blood who triumphed over them all! It was a title to be proud of. The thought of studying up on purebloods to make himself seem more versed in their world disgusted him - like he was disappearing into the crowd. No longer the powerful half-blood Prince he was.
However, the thought also intrigued him. He knew long ago that he felt proud to be her son, proud to be part of her - she was the sole reason he had given himself that title after all. If he learned all the secrets of the Princes, perhaps he could reclaim some of that pride. It was like he was being pulled in two directions at once…
His path was clear. If she wasn’t going to do it herself then he would have to take on the task of protecting her. He would get all the information he could in order to one day see her laugh in the face of those who abused her, doubted her. For Tobias, in turn, to cower in fear in front of wife and son… as they had so often done before him.
This was the reason.
.
Feel free to have a look-see, comments are so much love so I would love it if you gave me some feedback. I'm going to find a few sites to post this on so if there's anything specific you like/think I could improve, I urge you to tell me - sexual favours for your troubles?
Oh and I can't really be bothered linking to the other chapters right now... I'll see if I can bothered when I post chapter 6 ;)
Title: The Pureblood Prince
Chapter Title: Serpent and Eagle
Chapter: 5/?
Word count: 3 712
Type: Angst/Gen
Rating: R
Warnings: Sexual allusions - not graphic.
Disclaimer: All characters, with a couple of exceptions, belong to J.K. Rowling.
CHAPTER V: Serpent and Eagle
“I’m sorry!”
“No you’re not, you little bitch! You do this to deliberately worry your mother and me! Gallivanting about outside with Muggles… are you incapable of processing how reprehensible and dishonourable that is?!”
“They were nice to me! I was only playing hop-scotch -“
“PLAYING THEIR MUGGLE GAMES! You have shamed your family!”
“I- father- I’m -I LIKED them! They talked to me -“
A hand swiftly came into harsh contact with Eileen’s face.
“Atticus! Stop that at once!”
The grey-haired man turned towards the door. Between the frames stood an equally impressive woman much younger than he, she was clothed in green robes and looking livid.
“Want to know what your precious daughter has been doing, Serafina?” Atticus spat, turning Eileen violently to face her concerned mother, “tell her darling! Tell your mother and make her see what you really are and prove wrong the lies she uses to protect you - go on!”
“I don’t care what she did, you are NEVER to lay a hand on her like that again!” countered Serafina Prince viciously, pulling her daughter towards her and bringing her into a shielding embrace amongst her arms. Atticus threw a long, pale finger in the air.
“This isn’t over, Eileen” he warned. “One day you’ll understand why WE do not mix with THEM - and you’ll come running to us, and you’ll be sorry, Merlin knows your mother will cave in to your idiocy but I…” He did not finish his sentence. With one piercing glare at mother and daughter Atticus stormed away from the scene, slamming the door behind him in his closing dramatic act.
“I’ll never be sorry!” Eileen cried. She turned towards her mother and buried her head into her belly, her body shaking with exhaustion and distress. Serafina bent to kiss her black hair; she wrapped her arms around her terrified child and rocked her. And suddenly, all was right with the world.
“Shhhh, shhh, shhh” Serafina whispered soothingly. “There’s no need to be scared, little one” she dropped into a chair with the weeping little girl on her lap. “Mummy’s here… mummy will look after you…”
“B-b-ut why doesn’t he want me to have friends mummy? Why?”
Serafina tightened her embrace.
“Eileen, you are a smart girl! If I’ve taught you anything it’s that you should think for yourself. Your father learnt many years ago that I am more than adept of giving as good as I got… you just need to prove yourself capable, and he’ll shut his fat prehistoric mouth up.”
Eileen managed a small giggle, and she saw a smirk playing around her mother’s porcelain features.
“Mummy, you shouldn’t talk about daddy that way!”
Secretly, Eileen had always been so deeply in awe of her mother. The way she held herself, the way she smirked, the way she spoke… without restraint, without fear, with such fire and honesty. Eileen could only dream of such freedom. It must have felt good to be her.
“And daddy shouldn’t talk to you the way he did,” her mother quickly added, her tone suddenly more serious.
Eileen sat herself up upon Serafina’s lap, looking defiantly into her black eyes, “no he shouldn’t! I’m like you mummy, I’m not stupid, I’m a witch and they’re Muggles! I can protect myself against Muggles ‘cause I have a wand and magic and they don’t!” she puffed out her chest proudly, desperately trying to become every inch her mother, who, it appeared, believed every word she said.
“That is very true, Eileen. You are such a strong girl...” She drew her back into a loving embrace and kissed her forehead adoringly.
“You are my girl.”
~
Days ran into weeks, mild study ran into hours upon hours of frantically scribbling notes down in the library, the workload was getting fuller as term progressed and Severus gladly welcomed the challenge. At least now he had a proper excuse to avoid the unnecessary banter of his fellow Slytherins as they all sat around in the common room late into the night. The only topic of which he was remotely interested was of the alumni of Slytherin house, his old group of ‘friends’, and their activities of late. Severus ached for the day in which he himself could join them - there seemed undeniable stagnancy in studying for tests and practicing useless charms at Hogwarts, while Lucius and others were actively making something of themselves. Granted, his old friends had been out of Hogwarts for some years now, but Severus could never get over the envy of hearing their impressive tales, and imagining and dreaming of himself in a similar role. For now he would have to bide his time and learn above and beyond what he needed to succeed spectacularly.
The tales of He Who Must Not Be Named and his Death Eaters were now rife within the entire school. Oh, those idiot Gryffindors would scorn and the silly sentimental Hufflepuffs would gossip, but there was no doubt of the fascination it created amongst many of Severus’s peers. Severus would sometimes stay up all night reading or listening about them. It seemed a life in which Severus could only dream of, of such power and respect. Power that he had never possessed before, despite his superior knowledge and intellect on most subjects of wizardry, despite the numerous amount spells and potions that he, himself, had invented! Something his fellow students and even most teachers and the most skilled wizard or witch could never in their life manage to accomplish! And still, still he lacked the respect from them - from everyone. But this… this was a way out… this was a future he deserved.
Most days Severus sat in the library alone; rarely did Regulus ever accompany him to such places save for looming assignments and exams. Some days he would attempt to be sociable and gather under the shady protection of the trees with his small group of seventh year Slytherins (in order to discover the latest information from the outside world), but usually he preferred the solitude and ability to think clearly without interruption; this was such a day. He sat in a dingy corner at the very back of the library, avoiding Madam Pince - the vulture-incarnate librarian - at all costs, flicking through numerous charms and potions and historical books lazily. He had no need for such an activity, but truth be told he hadn’t much want to do anything else. A few Slytherins, sixth years by the looks of them, sat in front of a big arches window to the corner, busily studying for some sort of Potions test by the looks of their books. Severus eyed them for a while, and wished they would stop turning the pages so damned loudly.
“Oh, we haven’t even started properties of Calming Draught!” cried one of the girls. Her friend, whom Severus recognised from the start of term feast, gave her a small push of warning - but this was a futile gesture.
“Silence!” came the painfully expected shrill of Pince, who had been stalking the bookshelves behind the group.
They immediately lowered the tone of their voices to an almost inaudible whisper. And for some reason, this irritated Severus even more. He started to pack away his books into his ancient looking bag, torn and sagging from the endless weight thrust into them over the course of seven years, and promptly made his way out of the library with the intention of locking himself away in the Slytherin common room. It was on the way there, however, that he came across a rather unpleasant sight.
“Sirius, I’m TELLING you it works!”
“Yeah, you keep saying that mate. I need some proof before I believe some of the shit you’re coming up with!”
“Alright - show you right now if you want! Come on then!”
James Potter and his gang of brutes may have been heading away from the entrance to the library, where Severus stood, but their voices carried far enough to wake the Giants in the highlands. Curious, Severus silently slinked behind a stone pillar and watched them assemble under one of the bigger trees of the courtyard in front of him. James raised his wand at the base of the tree.
“S-“
“James!” one of the boys suddenly interjected. Severus tilted himself further away from the pillar to see him, it was Remus Lupin, one of the more mild-mannered of the lot - if not still completely irritating; James lowered his wand and turned to speak with him, their voices too inaudible for Severus to make out.
With a quiet curse towards all the nattering voices who drowned out what precious information he could get from Potter, Severus decided to head back to the dormitory before dinner arrived. There was special business to attend to.
~
“You… what…?”
“I’m moving.”
“Yes, child, that I understand. But… him?”
“HE loves me!”
“HE is a Muggle!”
“You sound exactly like father! I suppose you don’t believe that I can take care of myself like you used to? Or is that I spit in the face of the precious little pure-blood fantasy you invented for me?!”
“Oh you are being so very naïve! Do you honestly think a Muggle man will understand you like a wizard would? Will be able to support you the way a wizard could?”
“Magic doesn’t matter to me anymore mother. You may have married father for power and wealth, but I’m not about to make the same mistake as you.”
“Mistake, you say? I’d prefer you to not make judgements on my choices, child! I am happily secured thanks to the match I made. If I had married for anything less… THAT I would consider a failure on my part. This, this family, the PRINCE family, is what I knew I deserved. Your father was simply the key.”
“And Tobias Snape is what I deserve. There is no discrepancy - save I’ll be with the man I love and you’ll be alone in a big house with an old and violent dogmatist!”
“Ah, I can see now why you were never followed the rest of your family into Slytherin. You have no pride in yourself or your abilities. You certainly have no ambition…”
“Yes, we all know how disappointed you must be in me mother! Only the crème de la crème can belong to your precious Slytherin… blight the Ravenclaw for breaking the chain of prejudice, right?”
“… you haven’t even told him, have you Eileen?”
“I don’t care about magic anymore, mother. If I have to give up this whole world for him, I’ll do it. I shall have nothing to tell him.”
“Idiot girl! Do you not understand that modesty and humility have no place within womankind? We cannot AFFORD it Eileen! You are throwing everything I’ve worked for right out of the window by running off with this filthy Muggle!”
“DON’T YOU TALK ABOUT TOBIAS LIKE THAT!”
“I and your father can do whatever we like in our own house! He is filthy Muggle brute who took away the good sense of my only daughter, my young and strong Ravenclaw, and until you come to your senses you are no longer welcome here!”
Without another word, without so much as an angry glare, the Ravenclaw lifted her head high and vanished from her mother’s sights and thoughts.
For the first time since her baby’s birth… Serafina Prince wept.
~
Severus was becoming frantic. He had hoped to spend the few hours before dinner perfecting the precious spells he kept safe within his mothers old potions textbook, his spells, his inventions, the pride and joy of all he had accomplished at Hogwarts. There was only one minor hurdle to this: the book was not there.
Stupid bastard! He cursed inwardly at himself. All the years he had protected this book with his life; he hardly let it out of his grasp! And as much as he wracked his brains to remember just exactly what he had done with it, he constantly kept coming to the same conclusion… it had been in his bag. He had not used it in a couple of days but it had stayed there, safe and hidden from moronic eyes.
With a frustrated sigh, Severus punched the pillow and fell back onto his bunk. He was not in the mood for dinner now. Besides, it could give him more precious time to search for his beloved book without being discovered by Regulus or any of the other Slytherin seventh year boys. He had often skipped meals to give himself the precious alone time he so dearly desired… he inwardly shuddered at the nightly reminders here that he was, indeed, not alone here. No, Severus would never in wildest dreams have allowed the boys, anyone, to hear him doing… that. Apparently the others did not have such a high sense of dignity as he.
The prospect of being alone for at least an hour, however, enticed him, urged him. The book could not have gotten far, anyway, and only the stupidest of fools would not have transcribed the inventions into another notebook - unfortunately, said notebook was bolted away in a drawer at Spinners End, with numerous charms and magical curses placed on the lock. Severus could not think clearly on such a fraught mind… and he could not take his mind off the problem enough to wholly relieve himself - faintly pleasing as it presently was.
Vicious circle.
To his satisfaction, his persistent mind began to relent. Firstly shifting between thoughts of the potions book and how vital it was that he find it before one of the teachers did, to the all-too-familiar sensation of his experienced hand. It didn’t take long… he had long since become adept at taking the shortest amount of time possible, else risk being interrupted. He never did this for sheer pleasure, after all - it was simply a means to quench even a slight portion of his frustration.
Feeling a great sense of new-founded clarity, Severus allowed himself a very brief moment to relax, as he always did. It was the only time he did. A passing moment where there was nothing to think about, a time to clear ones minds without the strain of actively trying to shutdown. Now the burden had been somewhat lifted, Severus cleaned himself up, and was about to head off to the bathroom when he heard noises coming form the Slytherin common room below.
Blast, why did they have to come back so early?
With snake-like reflexes, Severus had managed to hurl all of his books back into his chest and tidy his bed before heading to the landing to see who had decided to skive off dinner early. He needn’t have bothered, however, when he came face to face with Regulus in the arch of the doorway.
“Was wondering where you were,” came Regulus’ swift comment.
“Wasn’t hungry,” Severus mumbled, “had some Astronomy study I wanted to catch up on… you ate awfully fast?”
He was surprised at just how annoyed he was at Regulus for this.
Regulus pushed his away past his fellow Slytherin and slumped down onto Severus’s bunk.
“Yeah, well, if you had to eat around your idiot Mudblood-loving Gryffindor brother I’m sure you’d lose your appetite some time or another!”
Severus leant against one of the bedposts casually and crossed his arms.
“I’d have thought you’d be revelling in the fact that he’s a destitute, homeless decrepit now, Regulus? I know I am.”
“Hardly!” Regulus shot back, violently pulling off his shoes (Severus frowned- could he have not done that in his own dormitory?). “I overheard them coming into the Great Hall this evening. He’s at that Potter’s house! Can you believe that? The bastard has no remorse for what he did to our family whatsoever! Burning him off our tapestry was something he probably wanted, what kind of punishment is that to him?”
With an extremely amused smirk, Severus walked around to face his so-called “friend”.
“If you’re saying you want to teach your oaf of a brother a certain ‘lesson’ before we all graduate, then you have me at your service…”
“… you know the kind of lesson we’re going to teach them, Severus. After graduating.”
The breathtaking image began to trickle into Severus’s mind… him, Severus Snape, standing cloaked, an expressionless mask, his wand raised… vengeance extracted. How powerful he would be! How his father would curse the day he had ever turned on his wizard son and pureblood wife.
It was then that Severus decided to divulge in Regulus something that only he and one other person in the world knew…
“Listen carefully to this, Regulus,” he started, leaning in as to avoid being overheard by the other few voices now appearing in the direction of the common room. “I have, over the years, developed a few… inventions… that may prove useful if I were to make my way into their circle.”
“Inventions?”
“Spells, potions, curses…”
“… you? Fuck off.”
“Where did you think all my knowledge of curses came from? I didn’t read up on them all in the restricted section, did I?”
Regulus shook his head - both stunned and slightly agitated. “Stop being a prick, Severus! You’re seventeen. Sure, my parents have taught me loads of curses over the years, what kind of family doesn’t? But even they couldn’t invent their own!”
Severus felt a stab of pride.
“Believe what you will, Regulus, but nevertheless, I have a few curses that may prove useful to you in impressing that… family of yours… and even the Dark Lord himself, if you are willing to give me something in return.”
Regulus snorted, looking Severus up and down. “You know, if you really wanted money Severus, you needn’t offer made-up inventions for-”
Without a seconds thought, Severus’s hand had snapped out to clasp Regulus Black’s collar. He pulled him towards his face, etched with sudden anger and hostility.
“I want none of your blasted money, do you hear?! I have survived seventeen years without so much as a galleon in the bank and I’m still a more powerful wizard than all seventh years combined! Do not make me out to be some poor charity case in need, Regulus, or I assure you - you will regret it.”
“Alright! Alight!” Regulus replies, pushing Severus’s hand away from him. “Don’t be so bloody touchy all the time! What IS it that you want?”
“I want information.”
“What kind of information?”
“I want to know all the pureblood families connections.”
“You mean a tapestry?”
Severus rolled his eyes. He knew there would have to be some explaining to do. “Not just a tapestry… I want all the information you possess on pureblood ancestry.”
“Can’t you just ask your parents about that?”
Ha!
“My mother… doesn’t agree with such things.” Severus mumbled back. Were they all so inbred that they failed to notice the most “noble” House of Snape would be the last name to ever appear on their ridiculous tapestries? “She was barred long ago from her good name and sizeable inheritance by my grandparents. My father no longer permits contact with them, and it is my mothers wish that I adhere to what he says.”
No matter how nonsensical it must look to have a Muggle tell a witch whom she can and cannot speak to.
“So what about your fathers side-?”
“We are going around in circles here Regulus,” Severus quickly interrupted, else be forced to make up some fast and possibly very incriminating lies. “All I want is that. I want nothing more than that information… if I am to leave here and follow Lucius Malfoy into that circle, I need to know that vital history on bloodlines, -else it be my undoing. In return I shall give you your pick of my curses to impress the Dark Lord with when it is your turn to join us.”
“One curse?”
“Just one.” Severus was indeed too proud and protective over his work to be giving them away in such a fashion... but Regulus was the key to a vast knowledge of Wizarding ancestry, knowledge he knew his own mother would never give him.
“Alright then. Give me the curse and I’ll let you visit Grimmauld Place over the summer, good enough?”
“Good enough. I’ll teach it to you over the next few weeks.”
“Fine. I’ll be off then.” Regulus nodded his goodbye to Severus, leaving the latter standing alone, once again, in the middle of dormitory.
Severus could not help but feel an overwhelming sensation of disappointment in himself. Out of all the purebloods he had come into contact with, he knew he was infinitely more talented and powerful than they were. It was something he always prided himself on - something he wished he could rub in the face of all those pureblood maniacs. The half-blood who triumphed over them all! It was a title to be proud of. The thought of studying up on purebloods to make himself seem more versed in their world disgusted him - like he was disappearing into the crowd. No longer the powerful half-blood Prince he was.
However, the thought also intrigued him. He knew long ago that he felt proud to be her son, proud to be part of her - she was the sole reason he had given himself that title after all. If he learned all the secrets of the Princes, perhaps he could reclaim some of that pride. It was like he was being pulled in two directions at once…
His path was clear. If she wasn’t going to do it herself then he would have to take on the task of protecting her. He would get all the information he could in order to one day see her laugh in the face of those who abused her, doubted her. For Tobias, in turn, to cower in fear in front of wife and son… as they had so often done before him.
This was the reason.
.