Service Charges Work in Mysterious Ways
Ah, life, it has such a sense of humour. We all knew that right? And how nice it is to get reminders. So let me regale you with retelling the series of cosmic pranks which Z and I have been living with since Friday.
You know what's even more amusing than being sent a bill for backdated Extra Service Charges (merry Christmas to everyone!)? Having that bill sent to the wrong address.
And, what you may ask, is even funnier than that? Having court proceedings brought up against you because you neglected to pay this bill which you didn't know existed, and then being held responsible for all (steeply rising, bedecked with interest) costs for the legal proceedings.
And the punchline, the height of hilarity? Why, only learning about this situation upon receipt of a letter from your mortgage lender. A letter and copies of correpondence that uses an emotive turn of phrase such as 'blah blah violation of lease due to nonpayment of service charges' 'blah blah bad credit' 'blah blah remortgaging application on hold' 'blah blah sort it out suckers or look into the stony raging jaws of the repossession of your house'.
It's all been a barrel of capitalist laughs I tell you.
Actually, I am deeply proud of the way Z and I have dealt with it all. Nobody shouted, nobody blamed or accused or shook hands at heaven while shouting 'WHYYYYY MEEEEEEEEE'? Instead, we just pulled together in a steely team-like fashion to devise a plan and sort out the situation as quickly as possible and spent the in-between hours clinging to one another like chiller's kittens re-affirming the depths of our affection for each other and the the most important thing which was not losing sight of that or of our excitement at the nearness of baby.
Because if you do get stressed, if you do lose sight of that? Then the bastards have truly won.
So while the last few days have been embellished by all kinds of new and interesting stresses of the Plutonic 'let me strip you down to your naked shivering cores' sort, they were also some of the most deeply intimate of this year. Because the only antidote to harshness of the world? Exchanging ever-more tender language with your husband. And knowing that as long as you yourselves are okay, that is the key, the deepest heart and bone of it; that everything else will resolve itself.
Also, I have hope, for I have seen that men and God are not immune to the tears of women. How do I know this? Because yesterday the Cats Protection people phoned me up to ask if I wanted the little cat back.
You know what's even more amusing than being sent a bill for backdated Extra Service Charges (merry Christmas to everyone!)? Having that bill sent to the wrong address.
And, what you may ask, is even funnier than that? Having court proceedings brought up against you because you neglected to pay this bill which you didn't know existed, and then being held responsible for all (steeply rising, bedecked with interest) costs for the legal proceedings.
And the punchline, the height of hilarity? Why, only learning about this situation upon receipt of a letter from your mortgage lender. A letter and copies of correpondence that uses an emotive turn of phrase such as 'blah blah violation of lease due to nonpayment of service charges' 'blah blah bad credit' 'blah blah remortgaging application on hold' 'blah blah sort it out suckers or look into the stony raging jaws of the repossession of your house'.
It's all been a barrel of capitalist laughs I tell you.
Actually, I am deeply proud of the way Z and I have dealt with it all. Nobody shouted, nobody blamed or accused or shook hands at heaven while shouting 'WHYYYYY MEEEEEEEEE'? Instead, we just pulled together in a steely team-like fashion to devise a plan and sort out the situation as quickly as possible and spent the in-between hours clinging to one another like chiller's kittens re-affirming the depths of our affection for each other and the the most important thing which was not losing sight of that or of our excitement at the nearness of baby.
Because if you do get stressed, if you do lose sight of that? Then the bastards have truly won.
So while the last few days have been embellished by all kinds of new and interesting stresses of the Plutonic 'let me strip you down to your naked shivering cores' sort, they were also some of the most deeply intimate of this year. Because the only antidote to harshness of the world? Exchanging ever-more tender language with your husband. And knowing that as long as you yourselves are okay, that is the key, the deepest heart and bone of it; that everything else will resolve itself.
Also, I have hope, for I have seen that men and God are not immune to the tears of women. How do I know this? Because yesterday the Cats Protection people phoned me up to ask if I wanted the little cat back.