(no subject)
Well I believe i've been given the final straw. You know. Its simple. You wake up to someone doing everything for margot that she needs you think ok thats nice ive only had about what and hour of sleep so ill go back to bed...but wait as soon as you lay down its what are you doing? are you gong to feed her? ive done everything else. fine ill feed her such a damn task for you to do......fully rested and everything. of course margot wont eat she just screams....what do u do with a child that you get mad at? put her in her bed. so i did, I tried to feed her in her bed she ate some apple juice but then coninued screaming.I didnt know what to do.I mean i dont always know whats wrong or what she wants.If anyones had to deal with a screaming baby on no sleep you understand how much of a short leash you already have. my mom finaly takes her. then around 8 she runs into my room screaming. "If you think that you can just throw her into a swing or in her crib and she'll be happy you have another thing comming. and the way you got mad at her was just stupid all she needed was to be burped do you think for a second that maybe she was in pain? its just like b4 only shes a little bigger now. If i ever see a mark that you have layed on that child that will be the end and you know what i mean."
and now shes trying to be all nice to me and saying im sorry but someone had to say it. i wish someone would have said it to me. you much a better mother than i was and blah blah blah. well if thats so get off my fucking back. I dont think i deserve to be talked down to like that. and to say you love me after all that shit man whatever. i just put her in her bed bc i couldnt take it anymore what in the world is wrong with that? its not like i shoved the bottle down her throat and beat her sinceless whitch is what she was making it out to be my god. and when in the hell do i just shove her in the swing?pr the bed...um when shes tired....duh.all i do is hold her and play with her......when i get tired i put her in a toy...toys r good for her thats why they made them.
I guess when I can im leaving.....i do alot around this place probably more than i really need to. just so my father knows how much a appreciate him and all of what he does. but then i get pushed to the ground. its hard enough that i have to do this myself when im here but to tell me all of what she did and then come back like it was no big deal, is crap.Im tired of being treated like shit and being talked to like i have no feelings
and now shes trying to be all nice to me and saying im sorry but someone had to say it. i wish someone would have said it to me. you much a better mother than i was and blah blah blah. well if thats so get off my fucking back. I dont think i deserve to be talked down to like that. and to say you love me after all that shit man whatever. i just put her in her bed bc i couldnt take it anymore what in the world is wrong with that? its not like i shoved the bottle down her throat and beat her sinceless whitch is what she was making it out to be my god. and when in the hell do i just shove her in the swing?pr the bed...um when shes tired....duh.all i do is hold her and play with her......when i get tired i put her in a toy...toys r good for her thats why they made them.
I guess when I can im leaving.....i do alot around this place probably more than i really need to. just so my father knows how much a appreciate him and all of what he does. but then i get pushed to the ground. its hard enough that i have to do this myself when im here but to tell me all of what she did and then come back like it was no big deal, is crap.Im tired of being treated like shit and being talked to like i have no feelings