It'll Leave You With Nothing To Say, Lost Without A Way

[rainbow_demon]

Well everyone. This is supposed to be some big surprise. But FUCK it. I am comming home Novemeber 12th. My flight lands 5:30ish. I will be home. I will stay home. I miss it so much. I would give anything for it to be November 12th. I spoke to her for the first time in a week today. I asked her how her great grandfather was doing. She said he is doing good. That was the extent of our conversation. Wonderful huh?? Well life goes on. I am trying to get a good hold on my emotions and I am finding it difficult. I am hurt. I feel rejected. I am angry. None of these are good feelings. In fact I hate this situation more than anything else. But I will have to deal with it. Thats all I can do. Maybe she will talk to me before I leave. But if she dosent I can always just try and forget about her and move on. Even thou there will always be a part of me that cares deeply for her. That will never die. I know this situation isnt any easier for her. I just wish it wasnt happening. Things change.

If all else fails. I have a 5th of Jager in the freezer and a carton of cigarettes. Its time for bed.