Indiana Jones and the whatever-it-was
Waiting on Turn 8 RAWs, so I figured I might as well write down some of my impressions of Indy 4.
To summarize... ehhhh. >_>
So it's 1957, Indy's still teaching, but OH NOES! Suddenly Russkies! D= Russkies who come looking for a box of something. Turns out that the "something" is highly magnetic, and Indy uses magnet hax to find it. Turns out it is an alien or something. Whatevs.
And how does Indy escape? Soviets have worse aim than stormtroopers, and Indy is a monkey. Also, Russian lady had a sword. I APPROVE. Not quite a rapier, though. A bit too short, though it had quillions for fencing. Much closer to a simple gentleman's smallsword or an infantry officer's sword.
Oh, and I swear to god that Indy and scary Soviet dude grappled and fell into the X-Men set where Wolverine got his adamantium implants.
Later, we get introduced to Shia the Beef's character, motorcycle chase scene, opening mummies, capture, escape again, absolutely ridiculous swordfight on two moving vehicles, GIANT ANTS, family drama, waterfalls, and lots and lots of temples.
Silly fights and tired one-liners galore, and that's pretty much how the rest of the movie was. The entire movie felt even more comic book-ish than its predecessors, which is not necessarily a bad thing. I have a soft spot for things that are overwrought and overdone, but Indy 4 just doesn't quite get to the point of "so stupid it's awesome". I felt the chemistry between Shia the Beef and Harrison Ford was almost nonexistent, which is a shame, since I actually liked Shia's performance in Transformers.
But then again, what was I expecting? Indiana Jones has never been a franchise known for its excellence in writing. However, the delivery of the lines in this movie seem more unconvincing, and the jokes are either expected or delivered with little passion.
Also, someone noted that there was not a single temple trap (i.e. hidden floor panels, crazy schythes, etc.) that Indy activated throughout the entire movie. Seriously now.
Overall, I didn't expect quality cinema to come from this movie, but I did expect to be entertained.
...And I found it lacking. Woe.
To summarize... ehhhh. >_>
So it's 1957, Indy's still teaching, but OH NOES! Suddenly Russkies! D= Russkies who come looking for a box of something. Turns out that the "something" is highly magnetic, and Indy uses magnet hax to find it. Turns out it is an alien or something. Whatevs.
And how does Indy escape? Soviets have worse aim than stormtroopers, and Indy is a monkey. Also, Russian lady had a sword. I APPROVE. Not quite a rapier, though. A bit too short, though it had quillions for fencing. Much closer to a simple gentleman's smallsword or an infantry officer's sword.
Oh, and I swear to god that Indy and scary Soviet dude grappled and fell into the X-Men set where Wolverine got his adamantium implants.
Later, we get introduced to Shia the Beef's character, motorcycle chase scene, opening mummies, capture, escape again, absolutely ridiculous swordfight on two moving vehicles, GIANT ANTS, family drama, waterfalls, and lots and lots of temples.
Silly fights and tired one-liners galore, and that's pretty much how the rest of the movie was. The entire movie felt even more comic book-ish than its predecessors, which is not necessarily a bad thing. I have a soft spot for things that are overwrought and overdone, but Indy 4 just doesn't quite get to the point of "so stupid it's awesome". I felt the chemistry between Shia the Beef and Harrison Ford was almost nonexistent, which is a shame, since I actually liked Shia's performance in Transformers.
But then again, what was I expecting? Indiana Jones has never been a franchise known for its excellence in writing. However, the delivery of the lines in this movie seem more unconvincing, and the jokes are either expected or delivered with little passion.
Also, someone noted that there was not a single temple trap (i.e. hidden floor panels, crazy schythes, etc.) that Indy activated throughout the entire movie. Seriously now.
Overall, I didn't expect quality cinema to come from this movie, but I did expect to be entertained.
...And I found it lacking. Woe.