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[rain_cloud_88]

Ugh I'm so pissed off. Every small aspect of my life is fuckin controlled by my parents. I can't even decide what to do with MY OWN spare time. So, now that I basically do nothing with my time, I'm always sitting on my lazy ass at home, either sleeping or doing other stupid shit. It's nearly impossible to find a job in this fucked up state that Granholm says "is the greatest state in the country!" Fuck that! Who is she kidding. Neway, so I told my parents I wanna volunteer for "Big Sister" or w/e, where you hang out with lil kids. And they said that I can't do it. My dad's like, "it's to late to do community service and volunteer work for college. People your age have been doin it for years, and you were to lazy then. Now you wanna do all this and colleges see that." Whatever! That's not even the reason I wanted to do it. I wanted something to do, that actually served a purpose and was actually good, instead of going 2 the fuckin mall everyday and wasting money. And they won't let me babysit because they won't let me go 2 other people's houses. I can't work at the Animal Shelter in Detroit because they don't want me going there. WTF, AM I 5?! Ok, there's a big world out there outside of Allen Park, and it's time 4 me 2 experience it. I think I can fucking handle it, considering I hate this city as it as, and I know how 2 deal with shit. They can't expect me 2 spend my whole life within this 5 mile radious. Over my dead body. Period.

I layed in bed for like 20 minutes last night just thinking of bad things, and how pissed I am at myself for certain things. I don't want Spring Break to even get here... I have nothing 2 look 4ward to whatsoever. Most of my friends are gonna be gone, or probably not talkin to me anyway. To top it off, I have 2 go 2 the doctor and be stared at like an animal. This fucking blows.