Sucks to be the Narrator (It Happened in September, ch. 5)
Title: It Happened in September.
Chapter: 5. (Sucks to be the Narrator)
You should know the rest by now.
Last time, on It Happened in September, Scissorman once again jumps out of the shadows to pursue Jennifer! Will she be able to escape, or will she only find a Dead End? To be quite blunt, either is preferable to that one wench. Really, she's a stupid -uh, anyway, read on and find out!
Alyssa's mind raced as she looked out the window of the car, which was zooming through a thick forest. Dennis was driving her to the remains of the Burroughs Castle, which was on the outskirts of London, so that she could search the area for anything she could possibly use for a school assignment she had to complete. As her mind wondered off, she remembered what her teacher had said the day before.
Hey, wait a moment! That's the wrong fic. Now, where did I leave the real fifth chapter? Wasn't it supposed to be right in...? No, wait, I left it... Huh, I thought it was in the... Uh-oh.
This isn't good. I seem to have misplaced the fifth chapter. Well, we can't just wait around until it magically shows up, now can we? Do you happen to like improvised stories that slowly descend into random nonsense and cursing? Good, you're going to love the bile I have to come up with in order to go on with the show! Alright then...
Jennifer frantically flees through the hallway, her footsteps echoing behind her as Scissorman creeps towards her. For each stomp, there's a snip; for every step, there's a snap. She makes her way to and through the door at the end of the hallway, once again in the big, almost empty room where Anne's body would have been if it weren't for the fact that she burst into flames in the first chapter. Remembering how she hid behind the shelf in the storage room and hoping that the trick would work again, Jennifer runs upstairs and to that other lonely hallway. As she ascends the stairs, Bobby's scissors are still ringing dangerously close in her ears, almost close enough for them to cut one off.
As soon as she enters the gray hallway, she notices that the crow has flown away from her nest. Suddenly, a bomb of creativity explodes inside her head; she knows a quicker way to get Bobby off her tail! Her stalker enters exactly when Jennifer stands underneath the nest, glaring at her with malicious- yet at the same time childish and even almost innocent- blue eyes. Though Jennifer doesn't say anything to her pursuer, the look on her face just screams "Come and get me, pigface!", with a determined gaze and a somewhat cocky smirk aimed right at him. Bobby takes the bait and marches right towards her, possibly thinking that he has finally gotten his prey-if he can think of something other than just "KILL KILL KILL", anyway.
However, just as his scissors can almost reach our heroine and give her an unwanted new haircut, she unseathes her metaphorical weapon from behind her back: the plank that was previously in the corner. With her wooden sword, she bashes the birdy base above her as if it were a pinata, and it and its contents land on both her and the boy. (Don't worry, the eggs somehow manage to land safely on the ground.) The nest's owner nosily flies into the hallway as soon as the crack of the plank could be heard, and she indigantly swoops down to teach the nest destroyer a lesson; instead of her intended target, she hits Bobby. Nevermore that, bitch! How Jennifer knew that the bird would be close enough to be able to come in on time and attack, I have absolutely no idea. Let's just go with it.
As he is being crow-pecked, Bobby flails his occupied arms around him, somehow managing to miss both the bird and Jennifer even with his huge weapon. Defeated, he pathetically stomps out of the hallway, the squawking, feathered attacker still following. After the popcorn-worthy scene is over, Jennifer notices something shiny on the floor. She bends down to pick it up, seeing that it is a brownish-yellow key on the way there. It must go in one of the doors in the area, but which?
When she is unable to hear raging caws or sad scissor snipping, she exits the hallway once more. She tries her newly obtained key on the door closest to her, which unfortunately doesn't unlock it. A few steps later, she tries it on the second closest. The door clicks, a sound that she really wanted to hear; it works! She walks into the new area, worried about what she might find next.
The first thing she finds is another gloomy hallway, this time one lined with darkened windows. Pulling back one of the dusty curtains and peeking through the first window within reach, she sees the courtyard, the eerie moonlight reflecting off the clear pool. She then pulls back, pats the dust out of her hair and continues through what she thinks is a dark but otherwise nice hallway; at least, she thinks it's nice until she reaches the middle of the room and hears a shrill, horryfied scream. She impulsively looks through the nearest window, only to see... Nothing. Huh, guess it was just her imagination. She walks on to the other side of the hallway as if nothing happened.
When she opens the new door, Jennifer's eyesight is greeted by a lively shade of purple (or is it magenta? Some weird kind of violet?) paint, which covers the walls as far as she can see. She starts towards the right, until to see-oh god not her again.
"JennyfaaaaaAAAAH! OMG!!! BFF, it's SO nice to see YOU again! I missed my sexy long-lost cousin!" the WereSue wails. WHY.
Jennifer stares in silent at the neon blue-lavender-gold-emerald-ivory-pink-midnight black-blood red-rainbow-oh thank Little John she has clothes on this time monster. After an understandable pause, she manages to say, "Hey Sara, nice to see you again," in a rather quiet tone. (Hey, at least I'm not making her yell at the beast like I do all the time, right?)
"Liek, do you want me!?" the mansion's other stalker screeches. I feel sick.
"What?" asks Jennifer, her eyes bigger and filled with confusion.
"Oh, like, do you want to come with me? This is my house and all, I know how the nooks and crannies. I can even find your daddy's skeleton for you!"
Somehow missing that last bit, she takes a moment to pause. Since she hasn't found either Lotte or Rolla, she thinks she might as well go with what she has. I would much rather shoot the nuisance and find my friends and my way out myself, but you know, typical me. "Sure," she meekly accepts. This can't end well.
So, how did I do? Not too bad for my first improvised chapter, eh? ... Wait, someone's calling me. Hello? Oh, hey Boss! Yeah, I couldn't find today's chapter, so I had to make something up. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Don't worry, it's note like I made the token Mary Sue die slowly and painfully like I wanted to or anything.
... WHAT?! I could get fired just for that? What for?! I said I didn't- what do you MEAN it wasn't supposed to end that way!? She had to show up again somehow, whether I liked it or- hold on! What the-
By the next time this fanfic is updated, I may not have my job as narrator anymore! Will I manage to save my narrating badge, or will I end up on the streets and look like a grubby hobo like Simon? Read and find out if I'll end up jobless in the next chapter of It Happend in September!
...
Oh, yeah, and there'll also be something about that Jennifer girl and the Suebitch too.
Chapter: 5. (Sucks to be the Narrator)
You should know the rest by now.
Last time, on It Happened in September, Scissorman once again jumps out of the shadows to pursue Jennifer! Will she be able to escape, or will she only find a Dead End? To be quite blunt, either is preferable to that one wench. Really, she's a stupid -uh, anyway, read on and find out!
Alyssa's mind raced as she looked out the window of the car, which was zooming through a thick forest. Dennis was driving her to the remains of the Burroughs Castle, which was on the outskirts of London, so that she could search the area for anything she could possibly use for a school assignment she had to complete. As her mind wondered off, she remembered what her teacher had said the day before.
Hey, wait a moment! That's the wrong fic. Now, where did I leave the real fifth chapter? Wasn't it supposed to be right in...? No, wait, I left it... Huh, I thought it was in the... Uh-oh.
This isn't good. I seem to have misplaced the fifth chapter. Well, we can't just wait around until it magically shows up, now can we? Do you happen to like improvised stories that slowly descend into random nonsense and cursing? Good, you're going to love the bile I have to come up with in order to go on with the show! Alright then...
Jennifer frantically flees through the hallway, her footsteps echoing behind her as Scissorman creeps towards her. For each stomp, there's a snip; for every step, there's a snap. She makes her way to and through the door at the end of the hallway, once again in the big, almost empty room where Anne's body would have been if it weren't for the fact that she burst into flames in the first chapter. Remembering how she hid behind the shelf in the storage room and hoping that the trick would work again, Jennifer runs upstairs and to that other lonely hallway. As she ascends the stairs, Bobby's scissors are still ringing dangerously close in her ears, almost close enough for them to cut one off.
As soon as she enters the gray hallway, she notices that the crow has flown away from her nest. Suddenly, a bomb of creativity explodes inside her head; she knows a quicker way to get Bobby off her tail! Her stalker enters exactly when Jennifer stands underneath the nest, glaring at her with malicious- yet at the same time childish and even almost innocent- blue eyes. Though Jennifer doesn't say anything to her pursuer, the look on her face just screams "Come and get me, pigface!", with a determined gaze and a somewhat cocky smirk aimed right at him. Bobby takes the bait and marches right towards her, possibly thinking that he has finally gotten his prey-if he can think of something other than just "KILL KILL KILL", anyway.
However, just as his scissors can almost reach our heroine and give her an unwanted new haircut, she unseathes her metaphorical weapon from behind her back: the plank that was previously in the corner. With her wooden sword, she bashes the birdy base above her as if it were a pinata, and it and its contents land on both her and the boy. (Don't worry, the eggs somehow manage to land safely on the ground.) The nest's owner nosily flies into the hallway as soon as the crack of the plank could be heard, and she indigantly swoops down to teach the nest destroyer a lesson; instead of her intended target, she hits Bobby. Nevermore that, bitch! How Jennifer knew that the bird would be close enough to be able to come in on time and attack, I have absolutely no idea. Let's just go with it.
As he is being crow-pecked, Bobby flails his occupied arms around him, somehow managing to miss both the bird and Jennifer even with his huge weapon. Defeated, he pathetically stomps out of the hallway, the squawking, feathered attacker still following. After the popcorn-worthy scene is over, Jennifer notices something shiny on the floor. She bends down to pick it up, seeing that it is a brownish-yellow key on the way there. It must go in one of the doors in the area, but which?
When she is unable to hear raging caws or sad scissor snipping, she exits the hallway once more. She tries her newly obtained key on the door closest to her, which unfortunately doesn't unlock it. A few steps later, she tries it on the second closest. The door clicks, a sound that she really wanted to hear; it works! She walks into the new area, worried about what she might find next.
The first thing she finds is another gloomy hallway, this time one lined with darkened windows. Pulling back one of the dusty curtains and peeking through the first window within reach, she sees the courtyard, the eerie moonlight reflecting off the clear pool. She then pulls back, pats the dust out of her hair and continues through what she thinks is a dark but otherwise nice hallway; at least, she thinks it's nice until she reaches the middle of the room and hears a shrill, horryfied scream. She impulsively looks through the nearest window, only to see... Nothing. Huh, guess it was just her imagination. She walks on to the other side of the hallway as if nothing happened.
When she opens the new door, Jennifer's eyesight is greeted by a lively shade of purple (or is it magenta? Some weird kind of violet?) paint, which covers the walls as far as she can see. She starts towards the right, until to see-oh god not her again.
"JennyfaaaaaAAAAH! OMG!!! BFF, it's SO nice to see YOU again! I missed my sexy long-lost cousin!" the WereSue wails. WHY.
Jennifer stares in silent at the neon blue-lavender-gold-emerald-ivory-pink-midnight black-blood red-rainbow-oh thank Little John she has clothes on this time monster. After an understandable pause, she manages to say, "Hey Sara, nice to see you again," in a rather quiet tone. (Hey, at least I'm not making her yell at the beast like I do all the time, right?)
"Liek, do you want me!?" the mansion's other stalker screeches. I feel sick.
"What?" asks Jennifer, her eyes bigger and filled with confusion.
"Oh, like, do you want to come with me? This is my house and all, I know how the nooks and crannies. I can even find your daddy's skeleton for you!"
Somehow missing that last bit, she takes a moment to pause. Since she hasn't found either Lotte or Rolla, she thinks she might as well go with what she has. I would much rather shoot the nuisance and find my friends and my way out myself, but you know, typical me. "Sure," she meekly accepts. This can't end well.
So, how did I do? Not too bad for my first improvised chapter, eh? ... Wait, someone's calling me. Hello? Oh, hey Boss! Yeah, I couldn't find today's chapter, so I had to make something up. Uh-huh, uh-huh. Don't worry, it's note like I made the token Mary Sue die slowly and painfully like I wanted to or anything.
... WHAT?! I could get fired just for that? What for?! I said I didn't- what do you MEAN it wasn't supposed to end that way!? She had to show up again somehow, whether I liked it or- hold on! What the-
By the next time this fanfic is updated, I may not have my job as narrator anymore! Will I manage to save my narrating badge, or will I end up on the streets and look like a grubby hobo like Simon? Read and find out if I'll end up jobless in the next chapter of It Happend in September!
...
Oh, yeah, and there'll also be something about that Jennifer girl and the Suebitch too.