Economists Jokes
Economics is the only field in which two people can get a Nobel Prize for saying exactly the opposite thing.
Economics is the only field in which two people can share a Nobel Prize for saying opposing things.
ECONOMISTS do it at bliss point
ECONOMISTS do it cyclically
ECONOMISTS do it in an Edgeworth Box
ECONOMISTS do it on demand
ECONOMISTS do it risk-free
ECONOMISTS do it with a dual
ECONOMISTS do it with interest
ECONOMISTS do it with models
ECONOMISTS do it discretely AND continuously.
ECONOMISTS do it on Leontief's table.
George Stigler, Nobel laureate and a leader of Chicago School, was asked why there were no Nobel Prizes awarded in the other social sciences, sociology, psychology, history, etc. "Don't worry", Stigler said, "they have already have a Nobel Prize in ...Literature".
Q: How many Chicago School economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. If the light bulb needed changing the market would have already done it.
Q: How many neo-classical economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It depends on the wage rate.
Q: How many conservative economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, because look! It's getting brighter! It's definitely getting brighter!!!
Q: How many economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Eight. One to crew it in and seven to hold everything else constant.
Q: What's the difference between a finance major and an economics major?
A: Opportunity cost.
1st Law of Economists: For every economist, there exists an equal and opposite economist.
2nd Law of Economists: They're both wrong.
In the long-run, there is just another short-run.
-Abba Lerner
All models are wrong but some are useful.
-George Box
When two economists are out for a stroll together, how do you identify the U of C economist? He's the one walking randomly.
I was standing with Ken Arrow by a bank of elevators on the ground floor of Williams James Hall at Harvard. Three elevators passes us on our way to the basement. I foolishly said " I wonder why everybody in the basement wants to go upstairs". He responded, almost instantly, " You're confusing supply with demand."
I asked an economist for her phone number... and she gave me an estimate.
Economic statistics are like a bikini--what they reveal is important, what they conceal is vital.
Achieving free trade is like getting to heaven. Everyone wants to get there, but not too soon.
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Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives. Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true.
Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.
Postulate 2: Time is Money.
As every engineer knows, WORK/TIME=Power
Since KNOWLEDGE=POWER, and TIME=MONEY, we have WORK/MONEY=KNOWLEDGE.
Solving for money, we get WORK/KNOWLEDGE=MONEY.
Thus, as knowledge approaches zero, money approaches infinity regardless of work done.
Conclusion: the less you know the more money you make.
****************************
A traveler wandering on an island inhabited entirely by cannibals comes upon a butcher shop. This shop specialized in human brains. The sign in the shop read:
Artists' Brains $9/lb
Philosophers' Brains $12/lb
Scientists' Brains $14/lb
Economists' Brains $20/lb
Upon reading the sign, the traveler noted, "My, those economists' brains must be popular!" To which the butcher replied, "Are you kidding? Do you have any idea how many economists you have to kill to get a pound of brains?!"
Apparently, this is the "supply side" joke.
***********************************************
Economics is the only field in which two people can share a Nobel Prize for saying opposing things.
ECONOMISTS do it at bliss point
ECONOMISTS do it cyclically
ECONOMISTS do it in an Edgeworth Box
ECONOMISTS do it on demand
ECONOMISTS do it risk-free
ECONOMISTS do it with a dual
ECONOMISTS do it with interest
ECONOMISTS do it with models
ECONOMISTS do it discretely AND continuously.
ECONOMISTS do it on Leontief's table.
George Stigler, Nobel laureate and a leader of Chicago School, was asked why there were no Nobel Prizes awarded in the other social sciences, sociology, psychology, history, etc. "Don't worry", Stigler said, "they have already have a Nobel Prize in ...Literature".
Q: How many Chicago School economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. If the light bulb needed changing the market would have already done it.
Q: How many neo-classical economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: It depends on the wage rate.
Q: How many conservative economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, because look! It's getting brighter! It's definitely getting brighter!!!
Q: How many economists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Eight. One to crew it in and seven to hold everything else constant.
Q: What's the difference between a finance major and an economics major?
A: Opportunity cost.
1st Law of Economists: For every economist, there exists an equal and opposite economist.
2nd Law of Economists: They're both wrong.
In the long-run, there is just another short-run.
-Abba Lerner
All models are wrong but some are useful.
-George Box
When two economists are out for a stroll together, how do you identify the U of C economist? He's the one walking randomly.
I was standing with Ken Arrow by a bank of elevators on the ground floor of Williams James Hall at Harvard. Three elevators passes us on our way to the basement. I foolishly said " I wonder why everybody in the basement wants to go upstairs". He responded, almost instantly, " You're confusing supply with demand."
I asked an economist for her phone number... and she gave me an estimate.
Economic statistics are like a bikini--what they reveal is important, what they conceal is vital.
Achieving free trade is like getting to heaven. Everyone wants to get there, but not too soon.
***************************
Engineers and scientists will never make as much money as business executives. Now a rigorous mathematical proof that explains why this is true.
Postulate 1: Knowledge is Power.
Postulate 2: Time is Money.
As every engineer knows, WORK/TIME=Power
Since KNOWLEDGE=POWER, and TIME=MONEY, we have WORK/MONEY=KNOWLEDGE.
Solving for money, we get WORK/KNOWLEDGE=MONEY.
Thus, as knowledge approaches zero, money approaches infinity regardless of work done.
Conclusion: the less you know the more money you make.
****************************
A traveler wandering on an island inhabited entirely by cannibals comes upon a butcher shop. This shop specialized in human brains. The sign in the shop read:
Artists' Brains $9/lb
Philosophers' Brains $12/lb
Scientists' Brains $14/lb
Economists' Brains $20/lb
Upon reading the sign, the traveler noted, "My, those economists' brains must be popular!" To which the butcher replied, "Are you kidding? Do you have any idea how many economists you have to kill to get a pound of brains?!"
Apparently, this is the "supply side" joke.
***********************************************