Love < Life
So lately, I've been sickened by these couples that are all into each other. From random xanga's and livejournals, some people on myspace, etc. It just sickens me. I could call it jealousy, but I can't because I don't want anyone. I've had a lot of opportunities to "love"...but I think love is just over rated. I've been there, done that...it usually just ends up shitty no matter what. Because eventually, even if everything is perfect, one of you has to die. So the whole purpose of love is to feel pain. At least, that's what I think.
School is super shitty. I'm really behind in every class, but all I do is homework and read. I have to write a paper tonight, and begin working on two more huge papers. It's going to be exciting. The two huge papers are due a week from today, by huge I mean 5 pages. But it's 5 pages over crap I know nothing about.
Paper 1 = 2 page paper over Sir Gawain & The Green Knight
Paper 2 = 5 page paper over passage from Bible (fuck you Theology, God doesn't exist)
Paper 3 = 5 page paper over "Dead Man Walking" (fuck you Ethics, you're a pointless class)
So yea, 2 & 3 are going to suck the life away from me this week. I shouldn't be in these classes. For those of you that don't know, I'm finally moving from Houston. It's a wonderful thing, I still need to get more stuff situated, but I'm most likely going to University of South Alabama.
The bad thing though, I am in constant contemplation of dropping out right now. I'm going to fail most of my classes, I just...I'm not smart and I'm sick of trying to act smart. I study, I read, I go to class...but I don't comprehend the knowledge nor do I store it. I cheated in high school or used notes on almost all of my tests. Every once in awhile, I got something.
You'll just say I'm being down on myself, but I'm truly not. I bust my ass off for nothing I think.
So the moral to this entry...love is over rated and school sucks.
I don't even go out anymore. Going out for me is going to play Rugby games in another city. So I can't quit. I need the escape. But I'm taking this week off due to homework and what not.
Oh wait, Valentine's Day gets better for me. Two papers due and a Test in Environmental Science lab.
School is super shitty. I'm really behind in every class, but all I do is homework and read. I have to write a paper tonight, and begin working on two more huge papers. It's going to be exciting. The two huge papers are due a week from today, by huge I mean 5 pages. But it's 5 pages over crap I know nothing about.
Paper 1 = 2 page paper over Sir Gawain & The Green Knight
Paper 2 = 5 page paper over passage from Bible (fuck you Theology, God doesn't exist)
Paper 3 = 5 page paper over "Dead Man Walking" (fuck you Ethics, you're a pointless class)
So yea, 2 & 3 are going to suck the life away from me this week. I shouldn't be in these classes. For those of you that don't know, I'm finally moving from Houston. It's a wonderful thing, I still need to get more stuff situated, but I'm most likely going to University of South Alabama.
The bad thing though, I am in constant contemplation of dropping out right now. I'm going to fail most of my classes, I just...I'm not smart and I'm sick of trying to act smart. I study, I read, I go to class...but I don't comprehend the knowledge nor do I store it. I cheated in high school or used notes on almost all of my tests. Every once in awhile, I got something.
You'll just say I'm being down on myself, but I'm truly not. I bust my ass off for nothing I think.
So the moral to this entry...love is over rated and school sucks.
I don't even go out anymore. Going out for me is going to play Rugby games in another city. So I can't quit. I need the escape. But I'm taking this week off due to homework and what not.
Oh wait, Valentine's Day gets better for me. Two papers due and a Test in Environmental Science lab.