So, I've been hibernating.....
I had a really really good entry before the fucking asshat computer ate it, so bear with me on this one...
I've had a really difficult and really stressful month...not all bad....I've been working my dream job assisting on a
really huge case going on in my state, and since I want to do an excellent job at it, i've been devoting more time
to my job than ever....go me.
I've also been dealing with some demons from my childhood and adolesence....my insomnia has been finally
properly diagnosed as post-traumatic stress disorder, and I'm finally seeing a therapist that I feel will help me
really dig deep and face the issues I've stuffed away in order to survive head-on. It took me doing something
I was ashamed of and being confronted with it by Clay for me to face the fact that my way of stuffing my issues
away and avoiding them wasn't working for our relationship. I also realised that if I wanted to continue with our
relationship, I needed to come clean to him about everything I've gone though in my life and how the way I was
treated in certain situations affected me.
That was especially hard, seeing's that I was never one for letting anyone know what really went on in my house
when I was growing up--when you are a victim of abuse, you learn how to evade, deny, and conceal better than
the average Russian spy--and trust me, I've gotten so adept at it that it became second nature to me at one
point in my life. I took a risk, and told him EVERYTHING--and to my suprise, he didn't run--he's chosen to help
me confront my issues and to support me completely in my recovery.
There is more, but I need sleep--long day tomorrow.
What is happening in YOUR lives?
Love,
E. Carrington Forsythe
I've had a really difficult and really stressful month...not all bad....I've been working my dream job assisting on a
really huge case going on in my state, and since I want to do an excellent job at it, i've been devoting more time
to my job than ever....go me.
I've also been dealing with some demons from my childhood and adolesence....my insomnia has been finally
properly diagnosed as post-traumatic stress disorder, and I'm finally seeing a therapist that I feel will help me
really dig deep and face the issues I've stuffed away in order to survive head-on. It took me doing something
I was ashamed of and being confronted with it by Clay for me to face the fact that my way of stuffing my issues
away and avoiding them wasn't working for our relationship. I also realised that if I wanted to continue with our
relationship, I needed to come clean to him about everything I've gone though in my life and how the way I was
treated in certain situations affected me.
That was especially hard, seeing's that I was never one for letting anyone know what really went on in my house
when I was growing up--when you are a victim of abuse, you learn how to evade, deny, and conceal better than
the average Russian spy--and trust me, I've gotten so adept at it that it became second nature to me at one
point in my life. I took a risk, and told him EVERYTHING--and to my suprise, he didn't run--he's chosen to help
me confront my issues and to support me completely in my recovery.
There is more, but I need sleep--long day tomorrow.
What is happening in YOUR lives?
Love,
E. Carrington Forsythe