Desire...Hope
I warned you guys I might be spotty about updating, and here I am to prove it. Well, it's 8am, and i'm kind of sleepy, so this will be somewhat short.
Last night/tonight...it was the first time I felt the powerful urge to jump a girl and say "just screw the consequences" in a long time, the last time being about...late November LAST year. What brought this about? I have one really big turn on (ladies, avert your eyes, lest ye be scarred), and that is the silouette (sp?) of a black bra on white skin. The girl could be wearing a full Riot suit, but if that shows, god help me and her. So, one of my friends, who will remain nameless, was wearing this long-sleevy kind of shirt, and a...I don't know the exact word, but something similar to what Clint Eastwood wear's in all his western flicks. So, i'm sitting on the couch, watching TV, my friend comes into the room, and it musta been the lighting or it was a belly shirt or SOMETHING, and I see what I think is a silouette of a black bra on white skin. Right there I wanted to get up, grab her, bring her downstairs and then try to break her hips through a certain activity. Luckily i'm in much better control of myself. but something about it made me feel so...lonely, so desperate. Of course, I know that i'm nothing special to look at myself, with my constant stubble, goatee, long silky hair and glasses, but I would have hoped some girl would have expressed intrest in me by now. Maybe they have, and i'm just too socially autistic to see it. Not the first time that would have happened.
And beyond that, I have another revelation. Despite my somewhat cold exterior, despite my love of watching violent films, I realized that I am a big softy. What does it say when you get really dissappointed at Christmas when you don't get Chobits on DVD? or when you get really excited after X-mas because you got to go to Target and spend a gift thing and get...Romeo & Juliet? I mean, I got Ghost In The Shell too, but I was more excited about R&J.
"A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet"
Last night/tonight...it was the first time I felt the powerful urge to jump a girl and say "just screw the consequences" in a long time, the last time being about...late November LAST year. What brought this about? I have one really big turn on (ladies, avert your eyes, lest ye be scarred), and that is the silouette (sp?) of a black bra on white skin. The girl could be wearing a full Riot suit, but if that shows, god help me and her. So, one of my friends, who will remain nameless, was wearing this long-sleevy kind of shirt, and a...I don't know the exact word, but something similar to what Clint Eastwood wear's in all his western flicks. So, i'm sitting on the couch, watching TV, my friend comes into the room, and it musta been the lighting or it was a belly shirt or SOMETHING, and I see what I think is a silouette of a black bra on white skin. Right there I wanted to get up, grab her, bring her downstairs and then try to break her hips through a certain activity. Luckily i'm in much better control of myself. but something about it made me feel so...lonely, so desperate. Of course, I know that i'm nothing special to look at myself, with my constant stubble, goatee, long silky hair and glasses, but I would have hoped some girl would have expressed intrest in me by now. Maybe they have, and i'm just too socially autistic to see it. Not the first time that would have happened.
And beyond that, I have another revelation. Despite my somewhat cold exterior, despite my love of watching violent films, I realized that I am a big softy. What does it say when you get really dissappointed at Christmas when you don't get Chobits on DVD? or when you get really excited after X-mas because you got to go to Target and spend a gift thing and get...Romeo & Juliet? I mean, I got Ghost In The Shell too, but I was more excited about R&J.
"A rose by any other name would smell just as sweet"