the reasons why i should be allowed to sleep over at pat's house for new years
so the situation is that i desire to sleep over at mr ayukawa's house for new years. the people present would include: pat and tara, pat and julie, greg and rachel, me, and jenna. see the aforementioned groups of "ands" are couples. now i find the main objection to co-ed sleepovers is that i could have sex. but how can i have sex if everyone else is already dating each other?
so to present my facts in a clear and concise manner, and to help my mom see the light, i thought i would present it to her in a basic form...like a dr. suess book
"Teenage Sex is Everywhere"
:ahem:
Teen sex can happen everywhere
On a chair
While playing with hair
In a car
At a bar
In a store
With a whore
In a pool
During school
In the sun
Casually for fun
In the night
Making up after a fight
During the day
In a stack of hay
On the ground
While a whole bunch of your friends are around
In fact, it seems to be
that the only way sex can't happen at pat's house is with ME
you cannot have sex with three boys in relationships who are like your brothers
yet they've all received approval from their mothers
though she loves me and it makes me sound like a jerk
sex with jenna would not possibly work
perhaps there is some little known medical fact i am missing
where you can get pregnant if couples around you are kissing
so maybe my friends have sex, i really don't care
the fact is, they're not going to do it while i am there
it doesn't matter if you think all my friends are whores
the bottom line is, they're someone else's child, not yours
on new year's eve, tons of teens EXCEPT ME are having sex all across the nation
please take my plea into consideration
i am respectful, i do extracurriculars, there are many sports that i play
i even have a 4.2 GPA
yet you would rather have me go to a party of some kid you don't know
where the opportunity for trouble exponentially grows
i could sneak out, actually have sex, get drunk, perhaps join a pirate crew
but at pat's house, blatantly disrespecting his mom by acting like that is something i would never do
it seems that as to my chances of getting laid at pat's, i am clean out of luck
perhaps at pat's house, the couples might all @#$% (this is, after all, a children's book)
but it just seems as though my new year's is going to suck.
jenna's version of the book:
JLHduker: i would just be like "listen i am not fuckin anyone so i am sleeping in pat's yard... cuz no one's dick will be hard... adria is a virgin and will be for another night... i really dont' wanna fight... just listen you hussy... no one watns her pussy ...
classy, as usual.
i like mine better.
so to present my facts in a clear and concise manner, and to help my mom see the light, i thought i would present it to her in a basic form...like a dr. suess book
"Teenage Sex is Everywhere"
:ahem:
Teen sex can happen everywhere
On a chair
While playing with hair
In a car
At a bar
In a store
With a whore
In a pool
During school
In the sun
Casually for fun
In the night
Making up after a fight
During the day
In a stack of hay
On the ground
While a whole bunch of your friends are around
In fact, it seems to be
that the only way sex can't happen at pat's house is with ME
you cannot have sex with three boys in relationships who are like your brothers
yet they've all received approval from their mothers
though she loves me and it makes me sound like a jerk
sex with jenna would not possibly work
perhaps there is some little known medical fact i am missing
where you can get pregnant if couples around you are kissing
so maybe my friends have sex, i really don't care
the fact is, they're not going to do it while i am there
it doesn't matter if you think all my friends are whores
the bottom line is, they're someone else's child, not yours
on new year's eve, tons of teens EXCEPT ME are having sex all across the nation
please take my plea into consideration
i am respectful, i do extracurriculars, there are many sports that i play
i even have a 4.2 GPA
yet you would rather have me go to a party of some kid you don't know
where the opportunity for trouble exponentially grows
i could sneak out, actually have sex, get drunk, perhaps join a pirate crew
but at pat's house, blatantly disrespecting his mom by acting like that is something i would never do
it seems that as to my chances of getting laid at pat's, i am clean out of luck
perhaps at pat's house, the couples might all @#$% (this is, after all, a children's book)
but it just seems as though my new year's is going to suck.
jenna's version of the book:
JLHduker: i would just be like "listen i am not fuckin anyone so i am sleeping in pat's yard... cuz no one's dick will be hard... adria is a virgin and will be for another night... i really dont' wanna fight... just listen you hussy... no one watns her pussy ...
classy, as usual.
i like mine better.