We Found Love
Title: We Found Love
Summary: Ian comes home to a broken Anthony.
Ratings: PG-13 for a suicide attempt and blood.
Previous Chapters: Compainion Piece: http://raeofthestage.livejournal.com/6789.html
A/N: This is depressing and deals with suicide. Enjoy?♥Rae
I walked into the house. I had been out running errands all days. I had wanted you to come with me, but you said you had things to do. I’m not going to lie; I was disappointed that you didn’t want to come with me. I thought about pushing you, but there was something in your eyes that made me not. I just don’t seem to know what page you are on lately. We still laugh together, but the lightness is gone. There is something heavy in the air.
I poked my head into your room but you’re not there. Where are you? I leave and walk past the bathroom where I hear a gasp. I open the bathroom door and there you are slumped over the sink with the water running red. There are matching red gashed on your wrists. I will never forget the look in your eyes. That dead look.
I run and turn off the water and grabbed a towel and pressed against your wrists.
“What the FUCK ANTHONY!!”
You don’t say anything just look at me.
“Why did you stop me?”
“Why? Because you are my best friend. That’s why.”
“Yeah and that’s all ever be to you.”
You push past me and move to our living room. Your words haunt me. What more is there beside best friend? I reached down and grabbed the first aid kit, but I knew that it wouldn’t fix what was really wrong.
I walked in and sat down beside you. The towel was soaked with blood. Anyone else I wouldn’t have been able to stay, anyone but you. I grabbed your wrist and pull out the gauze. I put and pad down and began to wrap you up in silence.
“Anthony, please tell me what it is wrong. I don’t want you want hurt yourself. I don’t know what I would do if you died.”
You’re still sitting there in silence looking down at my hand on your wrist.
“You would find some girl and fall in love with her and get married. And if I was dead I would have to pretend that I was happy.”
“Why wouldn’t you be happy at my wedding?”
“Because it wouldn’t be our wedding Ian. It will never be our wedding.”
I saw the tears roll down your face. You didn’t hide them. I couldn’t process what you told me. You loved me. I never thought of you in that way. I always thought of you as just my best friend. I have hurt you so much. The slits on your wrists are evidenced of this.
“Anthony… I don’t love you. I am so sorry.”
“No, you’re not. You’re not sorry that you’ve ruined my life by making fall in love with you.”
You wince as you pull your arm out of my grip.
“Don’t do that. Let me finish wrapping you up before we go to the hospital.”
“We’re not going to anywhere. I just want to die.”
I felt the tears roll down my face.
“Please don’t say that.”
“Ian I can’t stay here anymore. If you don’t love me, I’m leaving.”
You get up and start to walk away. There is still blood running down the one arm I didn’t bandage.
In an impulse I run up and slam you into the wall.
“You little fucker! You think I am going to let you walk out of here and die on some random street corner?”
“What else am I supposed to do?”
My heart broke. There was no hope left in your eyes. I did the only thing that I knew. I pulled you in close and just held you. I felt you put your arms around.
“I will do anything to make you stay Ant.”
I leaned down and kissed you.
Anything.
Summary: Ian comes home to a broken Anthony.
Ratings: PG-13 for a suicide attempt and blood.
Previous Chapters: Compainion Piece: http://raeofthestage.livejournal.com/6789.html
A/N: This is depressing and deals with suicide. Enjoy?♥Rae
I walked into the house. I had been out running errands all days. I had wanted you to come with me, but you said you had things to do. I’m not going to lie; I was disappointed that you didn’t want to come with me. I thought about pushing you, but there was something in your eyes that made me not. I just don’t seem to know what page you are on lately. We still laugh together, but the lightness is gone. There is something heavy in the air.
I poked my head into your room but you’re not there. Where are you? I leave and walk past the bathroom where I hear a gasp. I open the bathroom door and there you are slumped over the sink with the water running red. There are matching red gashed on your wrists. I will never forget the look in your eyes. That dead look.
I run and turn off the water and grabbed a towel and pressed against your wrists.
“What the FUCK ANTHONY!!”
You don’t say anything just look at me.
“Why did you stop me?”
“Why? Because you are my best friend. That’s why.”
“Yeah and that’s all ever be to you.”
You push past me and move to our living room. Your words haunt me. What more is there beside best friend? I reached down and grabbed the first aid kit, but I knew that it wouldn’t fix what was really wrong.
I walked in and sat down beside you. The towel was soaked with blood. Anyone else I wouldn’t have been able to stay, anyone but you. I grabbed your wrist and pull out the gauze. I put and pad down and began to wrap you up in silence.
“Anthony, please tell me what it is wrong. I don’t want you want hurt yourself. I don’t know what I would do if you died.”
You’re still sitting there in silence looking down at my hand on your wrist.
“You would find some girl and fall in love with her and get married. And if I was dead I would have to pretend that I was happy.”
“Why wouldn’t you be happy at my wedding?”
“Because it wouldn’t be our wedding Ian. It will never be our wedding.”
I saw the tears roll down your face. You didn’t hide them. I couldn’t process what you told me. You loved me. I never thought of you in that way. I always thought of you as just my best friend. I have hurt you so much. The slits on your wrists are evidenced of this.
“Anthony… I don’t love you. I am so sorry.”
“No, you’re not. You’re not sorry that you’ve ruined my life by making fall in love with you.”
You wince as you pull your arm out of my grip.
“Don’t do that. Let me finish wrapping you up before we go to the hospital.”
“We’re not going to anywhere. I just want to die.”
I felt the tears roll down my face.
“Please don’t say that.”
“Ian I can’t stay here anymore. If you don’t love me, I’m leaving.”
You get up and start to walk away. There is still blood running down the one arm I didn’t bandage.
In an impulse I run up and slam you into the wall.
“You little fucker! You think I am going to let you walk out of here and die on some random street corner?”
“What else am I supposed to do?”
My heart broke. There was no hope left in your eyes. I did the only thing that I knew. I pulled you in close and just held you. I felt you put your arms around.
“I will do anything to make you stay Ant.”
I leaned down and kissed you.
Anything.