Here comes the gushiness...
Okay so you have been warned! I have to say that the last month and a half has been wonderful and very different from what I am used to. For the first time, ever, I am completely falling for someone without feeling like I am spiraling, losing control, or off kilter in the least. I just happen to be in the most satisfying and wonderful relationship that I have ever had. In the past the level of intensity and passion would have meant total isolation. Going into what I call "the relationship whole". Not the case. Yes, we are always together, but quite honestly that is because he sees things in a different way than I ever have and helps me to broaden my perspective. Life is just "enhanced" with him in it. I still have issues. Money still seems to get me down. However, for the first time in my life, I have that rock. I have that support that I have been able to give others, but have never really found for myself in all areas of my life. He is amazing. The hardest part for me is learning to accept the contributions that his just being in my life provides. He is teaching me so many things...to take a compliment, to accept financial help, to accept support, patience. There is so much that he has already brought into my life, and that I know he will continue to. It is amazing to be a woman in my posiion. This last year saw the hopeless romantic beaten out of me, and just when I am ready to completely give up on the male gender, here he arrives. I am learning to trust, trust him, trust romanticism, trust that regardless of what happens I know that I have had one of the most amazing relationships of my life. I can only hope that it continues. I realize, being with him, how much I have settled for in the past. With him there is no settling, he is an amazing man, a gentleman, an amazing lover, a caring partner, a woonderful friend, a fabulous artist, a potentially amazing pagan priest. I truly have all of the things that I have wanted mirrored in him, and more than I could have dreamt up. I am happy and loved. I am in touch with reality and not isolated by anything more than a lack of phone and money. It is quite possible that I am in the first grown up relationship of my life. I have to say I like it a lot. There will be of course more on him later, but I believe this is a good start.