Five Ways to Be a Food Allergy Ally During the Holidays

[rae_beta]

Augh! I really, really will get the "Friends and Allies of Peanut-Allergic Adults FAQ" thing up and running in 2009, I promise! A couple people have offered to help, and as soon as we have time to sit down and hash it out, posts will be coming fast and furious

Comments

[badgerbag]

I would like to add, when a person mentions they have a food allergy, just drop the subject! I really dislike the round of questions, comments, comparisons, skepticism and advice that results if I ask about peanuts or mango or whatever. I can't eat it, I'm a grown up and know what happens when I do, end of story. People are so very rude to keep trying to shift the conversation to something that is sort of personal, painful, or tedious!

But they so often do.

[rae_beta]

Useful advice year-round--and I agree. On top of the basic dismay at being treated as if I'm wearing an "Ask Me Detailed Personal Questions About My Body" button, the frequent accompanying implication that I can't gauge risk and define my own comfort zone--or am being thoughtless and ungrateful by refusing or asking questions about food--makes me so goddamn mad.

Mind if I add this to the general FAQ when I get it up and running?

[badgerbag]

It's so weird! Why is it? It is the same with people who want me to do whatever hippie alterna-treatment to make me walk. They don't let up.

I think at best, or to be overly generous, they really really want us to be Better and they like the idea that they are going to be instrumental in that Cure... our saviors. And the more freaking sad that person's life is... the less control they have over their own life, the more it appeals to them that they might be helpful or have influence in someone else's. So I find it is people who feel sort of powerless in their own life who want to leap into mine and FIX ME. Even if fixing means "convincing me it's all in my head".

[rivertumbled]

this is so good.

[dark_angel1383]

I think this is a great list. I suffer from other food allergies (nuts are a-ok for me) and have a good friend who is allergic to coconut. She suffers a good deal of awkwardness during the holidays having to turn down cookies (damn those macaroons) and cakes and stuff. I'll pass this along to her.