I need you here.
Spent the evening trying to write a grown-up professional bio. By grown-up professional bio, I mean a bio that doesn't really read like these two bios I had during high school that dug up on Google:
Paolo Sambrano can be compared to an airplane full of cheerleaders that crash-landed in Candyland. the resulting debris was a peppermint and shrapnel laced pep-rally amidst the burning wreckage. On a mission to bring face rocking rock and roll to the masses by any means necessary, aside from actually playing an instrument, this nineteen year old community college screw up, corporate flunkie, blogger wannabe is the creator of the UthTV show “Commerical Free Paolo”. In addition to that, he is the maintainer of Subversive Irony, and a contributor to UthTV’s blog and to SFist.
or
Paolo Sambrano, Factory Lead Youth Producer: As lead producer and editor on Elements, Paolo Sambrano coordinated and led pre- and post-production activities among his peers. People say that Paolo has done more than the average seventeen-year-old, but less than the above average seventeen year old. Born September 4th, 1986, an Oakland native and high school recluse, Paolo has taken it upon himself to use digital media for cultural liberation, especially for contemporary Asian-Pacific-Americans. He has been a stalwart member, volunteer, and supporter for various youth and media organizations in San Francisco Bay Area, such as AYPAL (Asian Pacific Islander Youth Promothing Advocacy and Leadership), NAATA (National Asian-American Telecommunications Association), and Youth Sounds. When he's not getting rejected from prestigious film festivals, Paolo enjoys writing witty biographies about himself in the 3rd person. He goes to Diablo Valley College and is perpetually single.
I still think that line about cheerleaders pep rallying in Candyland is fucking boss. I remember when I wrote that line, LOST just started, and I couldn't get that image of the dude being sucked into the jet engine out of my dome. That was four years ago! Holy shit!
All I got so far is:
Paolo Sambrano does Solo Performance because he couldn't hack it as a filmmaker. Sardonicism and crushed dreams aside, Paolo has been Solo Performing for a year and change now and couldn't be any more happier. Bi-Poseur is his first full length solo show.
While I'm waxing nostalgic, here's a photo from the past. Found it posted next to one of my old bios. 2003-2004 I think. Some of you may recognize this.
Paolo Sambrano can be compared to an airplane full of cheerleaders that crash-landed in Candyland. the resulting debris was a peppermint and shrapnel laced pep-rally amidst the burning wreckage. On a mission to bring face rocking rock and roll to the masses by any means necessary, aside from actually playing an instrument, this nineteen year old community college screw up, corporate flunkie, blogger wannabe is the creator of the UthTV show “Commerical Free Paolo”. In addition to that, he is the maintainer of Subversive Irony, and a contributor to UthTV’s blog and to SFist.
or
Paolo Sambrano, Factory Lead Youth Producer: As lead producer and editor on Elements, Paolo Sambrano coordinated and led pre- and post-production activities among his peers. People say that Paolo has done more than the average seventeen-year-old, but less than the above average seventeen year old. Born September 4th, 1986, an Oakland native and high school recluse, Paolo has taken it upon himself to use digital media for cultural liberation, especially for contemporary Asian-Pacific-Americans. He has been a stalwart member, volunteer, and supporter for various youth and media organizations in San Francisco Bay Area, such as AYPAL (Asian Pacific Islander Youth Promothing Advocacy and Leadership), NAATA (National Asian-American Telecommunications Association), and Youth Sounds. When he's not getting rejected from prestigious film festivals, Paolo enjoys writing witty biographies about himself in the 3rd person. He goes to Diablo Valley College and is perpetually single.
I still think that line about cheerleaders pep rallying in Candyland is fucking boss. I remember when I wrote that line, LOST just started, and I couldn't get that image of the dude being sucked into the jet engine out of my dome. That was four years ago! Holy shit!
All I got so far is:
Paolo Sambrano does Solo Performance because he couldn't hack it as a filmmaker. Sardonicism and crushed dreams aside, Paolo has been Solo Performing for a year and change now and couldn't be any more happier. Bi-Poseur is his first full length solo show.
While I'm waxing nostalgic, here's a photo from the past. Found it posted next to one of my old bios. 2003-2004 I think. Some of you may recognize this.