Random thoughts about Japan or how to date a japanese man
Here i wanna try to explain how it is to live in Japan , be japanese wife or girlfriend and where is the difference between european and japanese people. sometimes i write about my personal experience, sometimes about my friends and people i ve met in my life. The reason why im doing this is cause long time i was kinda obsessed with this country and i thought one day i can be part of it, but then i realized that its impossible and i will tell you why.first of all, Japan has their own rules which only japanese people can handle and understand. Its safe country but sometimes you think that its too safe and quiet, like nothing unusual happening here. People always very kind to gaijins and trying to help you as much as they can..but even if you trying hard , you ll be a silly for them, like baka gaijin.U will never change it cause you will always look different.Now i want to write about japanese bf`s or husbands, its more interesting for me. Many times i`ve heard from girls that they wanna marry japanese guy, for some reason. Usualy reasons - 1. They`re sooo cute , kawaiiiii, beautiful ...etc . 2. Im in love with country and i wanna marry japanese guy to live in Japan. 3. I like japanese music bands and i wish i will find guy who look like my best singer, 4. I wanna escape from my country. Sure it can be more and more reasons but it doesnt change the goal. So. girls if you really wanna marry japanese guy, then dont try to discover google, or dating sites and search guy of ur dream. Just save ur money and go to japan, promise you `ll see more than any site can give you.If somehow you will find guy of ur dream and he wont mind dating foreign girl, then you already lucky, but think. what`s the reason he is dating you? Many japanese guys like foreign girls cause they`re beautiful. well and its true, they`re! So if he really like you then you must be ready to change urself anyway, cuz you wanna be with him, you wanna live in japan, right? then you have to change urself. And you have to change many .. many things aobut you.Japanese guys, as they are :1. working so hard and everytime. They spend 80% their time at work and its true. 2. their parents will always ask him about his wife or gf and you have to be nice with them or baibai live in japan3. if your bf or husband has a hobby, even if its small one and stupid as hell, never NEVER tell him that its stupid and he could rather spend his time with you. For example my ex bf was obsessed with fashion TV and half naked girls. Every day he came from work around 8 pm and just watched fashion TV. I told him that its so stupid and i would like he spend some time with me before we will go to sleep. I got angry look and i was said , never , ever tell him what he shoul do and how to spend his time after work. 4. Even if he will understand ur language , you have to laern HIS language and without HIS help. somehow by urself, by communicate with people around you.. i dunno... But the reason he wont help you is cause you came to live with him and you have to show him how you respect his country , his language. It will be hard, i tryed, but everytime i was saying smth wrong he mocked at me and told me that im stupid. 5. Japanese food and cooking. Lucky me, i like any food and i can eat almost everything , but ... once my ex gave me strawberry mixed with mayonnaise and some salad. Damn, my russian stomache couldnt accept it . So the result was - you not respect me , you dont like my country , you dont like food im eating.6. U have to be ready to spend most of the time alone while ur sweetheart at work, and thats why u have to learn how to cook japanese food, even traditional, and learn how to be alone most of the time. I got failed with this too.7. Weekend! Yeah off course everybody has weekends and even japanese people XD But its also different. Every saturday EVERYBODY in japan doing laundry. And ur sweetheart japanese, huh? So forget about any entertaiment and be ready to do laundry. Sunday..... sunday it the only one free day without any traditional plans lol and the final part is SEX! XDSex .... well, i think im adult girl for talking about this lolso... u already ready that ur japanese guy has to work most of the time from early in the morning till late evening , off course he`ll be very tired and after coming home will spend some time with his hobby, so you made traditional dinner for him, his stomacke is full and he is happy playing with his toys ... about 11-12 pm he is going to sleep and baibai ur hope to have even small pleasure. what?! He is tired ,,, he `s earning money for you both. u cant argue with it. but sometimes he might be not really tired and u`ll get ur bonus .. but unfortunately ....he will get this bonus, not you. in the bed , japanese people shy too, its their nature to be shy everywhere. and if you will scream of pleasure very loud, then other people can hear you, cuz walls in the house very thin XDD ah and yeah.... it wasnt main part.. main part is that u have to lose ur personality, forget everything you thought right and start to think as japanese people does. even some small things like .... slippers ... (when u wearing slippers do you think how u doing this ? japanese people has a lot of slippers and sometimes even when they going to the toilet they changing one slippers to another one) , shower and bath - never, ever put the sob in japanese bath. I dunno why, but if you wanna wash ur body , 1st you have to take a shower , then when you already clean you can take a bath, but just for relaxing and after you , any other member of your japanese family will take same bath with same water.... I was failed with this too xDD Towel on the kitchen - never put wet towel for hands on the dry towel for dishes. Its like you made biggest mistake in ur life ...
If you and ur husband decided to have a kids, then , i think it will loook like u are single mom. He will working most of the time and u will sit home with ur new born baby... isn`t it bored?
Actually i can write non stop about japanese culture and people cuz i had time to learn it, but main thing that i got for myself , that i will never be able to be a part of this culture, im always will be different, and what is more importanly i dont want to lose my personality, i want to be myself as i am, i dont want to be punished if i put wet towe over dry towel or if i get lost and came home later, or made wrong dinner or i don`t understand how to read kanji ..... i m not ready for this.
Long time i though i was right, and those time when i broke up with japanese bf i was blaming myself i thought i made a lof of mistakes, i thought its something wrong with me.... but the answer is - we`re too different, nobody wrong, i just couldnt do everything as he wanted and he couldnt allow me be myself . im so sorry for my english, its just what i wanted to say, what i realized ))
It doesnt mean that i dont like japan anymore, Japan is Japan. And you know guys, im happy that im russian, im happy beeing myself and im happy that now , i spend my time not with japanese people and nobody judge me for my language or any other stupid things )))
and yeah CUT ISN`T WORKING~~
gomenasai
XD
If you and ur husband decided to have a kids, then , i think it will loook like u are single mom. He will working most of the time and u will sit home with ur new born baby... isn`t it bored?
Actually i can write non stop about japanese culture and people cuz i had time to learn it, but main thing that i got for myself , that i will never be able to be a part of this culture, im always will be different, and what is more importanly i dont want to lose my personality, i want to be myself as i am, i dont want to be punished if i put wet towe over dry towel or if i get lost and came home later, or made wrong dinner or i don`t understand how to read kanji ..... i m not ready for this.
Long time i though i was right, and those time when i broke up with japanese bf i was blaming myself i thought i made a lof of mistakes, i thought its something wrong with me.... but the answer is - we`re too different, nobody wrong, i just couldnt do everything as he wanted and he couldnt allow me be myself . im so sorry for my english, its just what i wanted to say, what i realized ))
It doesnt mean that i dont like japan anymore, Japan is Japan. And you know guys, im happy that im russian, im happy beeing myself and im happy that now , i spend my time not with japanese people and nobody judge me for my language or any other stupid things )))
and yeah CUT ISN`T WORKING~~
gomenasai
XD