Fic - "Advice" - Doctor Who/Torchwood
Title: Advice
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Rating: K+
Pairings: Jack/Gwen, slight Rose/Doctor
Summary: A familiar face pops in to give Jack some advice whilst he laments Gwen's engagement to Rhys..
Author's Note: Written for the prompt "Ache" from philippa_, and also had to include the line "Bam, bam, strawberry jam!" Don't ask. PSE videos are bizarre..
Jack walked through the darkened Hub, the door grating as it closed behind Ianto and Gwen, the last to leave for the day. The blue lights from the computers left on standby flickered and gave the chamber an eerie glow. His hands firmly stuck in the pockets of his trousers, he trudged up the steps towards his office.
Sitting down behind his desk, he sighed deeply, then buried his head in his hands.
“Well, don’t we look sorry for ourselves?”
Jack’s head slipped out of his hands in his shock. He snapped his head up to see a very familiar face.
The Doctor stood in the doorway of his office, leant against one doorpost, one foot hooked behind the other. He was grinning chirpily.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
The Doctor made a put-out noise, as he unhooked his foot and sauntered across the room. “Well, that’s nice. I put myself out to pay my dear friend a visit, and this is the reception I get!”
Jack folded his arms across his chest. “No, you didn’t. The only reason you’d come and see me would be if you wanted my help or had nothing else to do. No worlds in trouble then, Doc?”
The Doctor sat on the end of Jack’s desk. “I can’t believe this! I’ve never been so unjustly treated. And for your information, I’m sure there are many planets that need my help. Just not at this exact moment of time.”
Jack snorted. “You’ve got bugger all to do, haven’t you?”
“Yep.” The Doctor swung his legs, “and I’m all alone in the Tardis, with no one to talk to. So I thought you might fancy a chat.”
Jack shook his head derisively. So the Doctor had been picking up human, “domestic” traits. The idea of the Gallifreyan “having a chat” without any battle or invasion in the process of taking place, was unheard of. Well, at least before he met Rose, at least.
“So why are you so sad then, Jack? What’s up in the Captain’s Hub? I take it they’re not all still mad about you leaving?” The Doctor fiddled with a whirring contraption on Jack’s desk.
“Don’t touch that - everything’s fine. Well, everyone else thinks that.”
The Doctor put the device down and sulked like a petulant child. Unable to keep still, he picked up a gold cube, with moving segments, ancient hieroglyphs etched onto each piece. Jack opened his mouth to reprimand him, but deciding that even the Doctor couldn’t break that, let him be.
“Come on, Jack, what’s wrong? It’s something to do with the girl you talked about, isn’t it?”
“Gwen.” Jack sighed.
“Did she go mad when you got back?”
“No. It was… it was like they hadn’t needed me. She… didn’t need me. They managed fine without me. Gwen was head of Torchwood.”
The Doctor grinned. “That’s the sort of thing Rose would do. I bet she’s head of Torchwood.” A wistful look passed over his face, and for a moment Jack was roused from his own problems long enough to feel sorry for his friend.
Jack was the only one he could talk to about Rose, and during his short time with Martha and the Doctor, they had spent many late nights discussing Rose and the day she was lost. Jack was the only one the Doctor felt he could unburden himself upon, telling him all the guilt he had bottled up inside him about that day in London.
The Doctor shook his head. “So, what’s up with Gwen, then?”
Jack looked down. “She’s getting married.”
The Doctor almost dropped the cube. “Ah. That’s bad.”
Jack stood up suddenly and paced up and down the room. “I don’t know why, but I feel betrayed. It’s perfectly natural for her to want to marry Rhys; she loves him, he can provide stability, a home, a family for her… I mean, I left her, didn’t I? But still….”
The Doctor nodded. “I understand. The green bug’s finally got you, Jack, you who’ve normally been able to get whatever you want.”
“What are you on about?”
The Doctor bit his lip as he fiddled with the trinket. “Jealousy.”
Jack made a laughing, incredulous noise. “Me? Jealous? I’ve had some people in my time, Doctor - God, was Marilyn Monroe good, - and I’ll have some more. I know I’ll get over this one. Gwen’s loud, obstinate, clumsy as hell, argumentative, Welsh, and… and.. beautiful, kind, funny, brave…Oh God..” He covered his face with his hand, and muttered something desperately to himself.
From what the Doctor thought he heard, he almost slipped off the desk.
“Jack, what did you say?!”
The captain removed his hand and said softly, “I love her.”
There was silence for a moment, as the Doctor took in what his friend had just said. He blinked a few times, his eyes wide, his mouth open in a small “o”.
“Now is when you say something comforting.”
The Doctor snapped out of his trance. “Oh, yeah, sorry. Um… and she’s engaged right?”
“Yes.”
“To another man?”
“Yes!”
“Then quite frankly, my friend, you’re stuffed.”
Jack sighed and laughed coldly as he made his way back to his desk. “Thanks for that.”
The Doctor flashed him a sympathetic look. “Do you really love her, Jack?”
The captain nodded. “When I was imprisoned for that year, it was she that kept me going. I ran every memory, every image of her that I had over and over in my mind, to keep me sane. And now, not having her, knowing she’s lost to me - it’s like this dull ache gnawing away in my heart, and no matter what I do, it won’t go away.” He rolled his head back. “What am I going to do?”
“Win her back, of course.” The Doctor said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Right, of course,” he said sarcastically, then rolling his head back into its correct position, quirked an eyebrow at the Doctor. “How?”
The Doctor sat up straight, bright and eager. “Right. First thing you’ve got to do is flatter her. Tell her she looks beautiful, that she’s special - that sort of thing. That always worked whenever Rose was in a mood with me.”
Jack grinned. “Which she often was..”
“Oi! I’m trying to help you, here. Love life advice hotline, me.”
“Sorry.” Jack tried to look serious. “Alright, I’ll compliment her. Then what?”
“Shower her with gifts. Indulge her. Flowers, chocolate, tickets to the theatre, a meal out, new dress…”
Jack looked up. “She mentioned that she’d never been given flowers before the other day..”
“There you go! An opening!” You can do something Rhys has never done! She’ll be yours, as easy as ... bam, bam, strawberry jam!”
“Right.” Jack looked confident, then suddenly, his face fell. “What sort of flowers though?”
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Oh please. You call yourself an intergalactic Casanova?”
“What then, Cupid?” Jack shot back.
The Doctor chose to ignore his remark and folding his arms, stated “Roses. Red ones.”
Jack opened his mouth - “Ah.”
The Doctor looked far too smug for his own good.
“Next: treat her like no one else matters. That means she is the only woman, or man,” he added, realising he was talking to Jack, “that is important to you. So no hanky panky with anyone else.”
Jack looked a bit upset. “Really?”
“Yes. Rose was rather keen on this. I think she enjoyed seeing me forcibly ignore any other advances made on me, all in her honour. She hated it whenever there was another woman about.”
“Just as you did when there was another guy.”
“Yes, well, I didn’t trust you. And with good reason too, you nearly destroyed the human race!”
“It was an accident!” Jack exclaimed. “And I thought we got over that!”
The Doctor looked down. “Well.” He turned the cube sharply to the left. “Look. Just try and show her she’s the only woman you’re interested in.”
Jack nodded. “Alright. Then…?”
“Then you hope like hell and run Rhys down whenever you can.”
Jack snorted. “Great. Thanks, Doc.”
“You’re welcome.”
He set the cube down quietly, and got to his feet. “You’ll be fine, Jack. Just flash her one of your grins every now and then, and she’s lost.”
Jack laughed as the Doctor turned and walked towards the door.
“Doctor?”
He stopped, one hand on the doorpost.
“Did those tips work with Rose, then?”
The Doctor bowed his head, and smiled to himself. “Every time,” he murmured, then he started walking again, leaving the office.
Jack smirked to himself, already plotting the seduction of Gwen Cooper. Away in his thoughts, he absentmindedly picked up the golden cube, only to discover that it was somehow broken in two. He snapped his head up.
“Doctor!”
There was a skidding noise and a flash of brown trench coat in the dark Hub, as the Doctor hot-footed it away, tout suite.
xx
Thanks for reading! Please review!
Fandom: Doctor Who/Torchwood
Rating: K+
Pairings: Jack/Gwen, slight Rose/Doctor
Summary: A familiar face pops in to give Jack some advice whilst he laments Gwen's engagement to Rhys..
Author's Note: Written for the prompt "Ache" from philippa_, and also had to include the line "Bam, bam, strawberry jam!" Don't ask. PSE videos are bizarre..
Jack walked through the darkened Hub, the door grating as it closed behind Ianto and Gwen, the last to leave for the day. The blue lights from the computers left on standby flickered and gave the chamber an eerie glow. His hands firmly stuck in the pockets of his trousers, he trudged up the steps towards his office.
Sitting down behind his desk, he sighed deeply, then buried his head in his hands.
“Well, don’t we look sorry for ourselves?”
Jack’s head slipped out of his hands in his shock. He snapped his head up to see a very familiar face.
The Doctor stood in the doorway of his office, leant against one doorpost, one foot hooked behind the other. He was grinning chirpily.
“What the hell are you doing here?”
The Doctor made a put-out noise, as he unhooked his foot and sauntered across the room. “Well, that’s nice. I put myself out to pay my dear friend a visit, and this is the reception I get!”
Jack folded his arms across his chest. “No, you didn’t. The only reason you’d come and see me would be if you wanted my help or had nothing else to do. No worlds in trouble then, Doc?”
The Doctor sat on the end of Jack’s desk. “I can’t believe this! I’ve never been so unjustly treated. And for your information, I’m sure there are many planets that need my help. Just not at this exact moment of time.”
Jack snorted. “You’ve got bugger all to do, haven’t you?”
“Yep.” The Doctor swung his legs, “and I’m all alone in the Tardis, with no one to talk to. So I thought you might fancy a chat.”
Jack shook his head derisively. So the Doctor had been picking up human, “domestic” traits. The idea of the Gallifreyan “having a chat” without any battle or invasion in the process of taking place, was unheard of. Well, at least before he met Rose, at least.
“So why are you so sad then, Jack? What’s up in the Captain’s Hub? I take it they’re not all still mad about you leaving?” The Doctor fiddled with a whirring contraption on Jack’s desk.
“Don’t touch that - everything’s fine. Well, everyone else thinks that.”
The Doctor put the device down and sulked like a petulant child. Unable to keep still, he picked up a gold cube, with moving segments, ancient hieroglyphs etched onto each piece. Jack opened his mouth to reprimand him, but deciding that even the Doctor couldn’t break that, let him be.
“Come on, Jack, what’s wrong? It’s something to do with the girl you talked about, isn’t it?”
“Gwen.” Jack sighed.
“Did she go mad when you got back?”
“No. It was… it was like they hadn’t needed me. She… didn’t need me. They managed fine without me. Gwen was head of Torchwood.”
The Doctor grinned. “That’s the sort of thing Rose would do. I bet she’s head of Torchwood.” A wistful look passed over his face, and for a moment Jack was roused from his own problems long enough to feel sorry for his friend.
Jack was the only one he could talk to about Rose, and during his short time with Martha and the Doctor, they had spent many late nights discussing Rose and the day she was lost. Jack was the only one the Doctor felt he could unburden himself upon, telling him all the guilt he had bottled up inside him about that day in London.
The Doctor shook his head. “So, what’s up with Gwen, then?”
Jack looked down. “She’s getting married.”
The Doctor almost dropped the cube. “Ah. That’s bad.”
Jack stood up suddenly and paced up and down the room. “I don’t know why, but I feel betrayed. It’s perfectly natural for her to want to marry Rhys; she loves him, he can provide stability, a home, a family for her… I mean, I left her, didn’t I? But still….”
The Doctor nodded. “I understand. The green bug’s finally got you, Jack, you who’ve normally been able to get whatever you want.”
“What are you on about?”
The Doctor bit his lip as he fiddled with the trinket. “Jealousy.”
Jack made a laughing, incredulous noise. “Me? Jealous? I’ve had some people in my time, Doctor - God, was Marilyn Monroe good, - and I’ll have some more. I know I’ll get over this one. Gwen’s loud, obstinate, clumsy as hell, argumentative, Welsh, and… and.. beautiful, kind, funny, brave…Oh God..” He covered his face with his hand, and muttered something desperately to himself.
From what the Doctor thought he heard, he almost slipped off the desk.
“Jack, what did you say?!”
The captain removed his hand and said softly, “I love her.”
There was silence for a moment, as the Doctor took in what his friend had just said. He blinked a few times, his eyes wide, his mouth open in a small “o”.
“Now is when you say something comforting.”
The Doctor snapped out of his trance. “Oh, yeah, sorry. Um… and she’s engaged right?”
“Yes.”
“To another man?”
“Yes!”
“Then quite frankly, my friend, you’re stuffed.”
Jack sighed and laughed coldly as he made his way back to his desk. “Thanks for that.”
The Doctor flashed him a sympathetic look. “Do you really love her, Jack?”
The captain nodded. “When I was imprisoned for that year, it was she that kept me going. I ran every memory, every image of her that I had over and over in my mind, to keep me sane. And now, not having her, knowing she’s lost to me - it’s like this dull ache gnawing away in my heart, and no matter what I do, it won’t go away.” He rolled his head back. “What am I going to do?”
“Win her back, of course.” The Doctor said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Right, of course,” he said sarcastically, then rolling his head back into its correct position, quirked an eyebrow at the Doctor. “How?”
The Doctor sat up straight, bright and eager. “Right. First thing you’ve got to do is flatter her. Tell her she looks beautiful, that she’s special - that sort of thing. That always worked whenever Rose was in a mood with me.”
Jack grinned. “Which she often was..”
“Oi! I’m trying to help you, here. Love life advice hotline, me.”
“Sorry.” Jack tried to look serious. “Alright, I’ll compliment her. Then what?”
“Shower her with gifts. Indulge her. Flowers, chocolate, tickets to the theatre, a meal out, new dress…”
Jack looked up. “She mentioned that she’d never been given flowers before the other day..”
“There you go! An opening!” You can do something Rhys has never done! She’ll be yours, as easy as ... bam, bam, strawberry jam!”
“Right.” Jack looked confident, then suddenly, his face fell. “What sort of flowers though?”
The Doctor rolled his eyes. “Oh please. You call yourself an intergalactic Casanova?”
“What then, Cupid?” Jack shot back.
The Doctor chose to ignore his remark and folding his arms, stated “Roses. Red ones.”
Jack opened his mouth - “Ah.”
The Doctor looked far too smug for his own good.
“Next: treat her like no one else matters. That means she is the only woman, or man,” he added, realising he was talking to Jack, “that is important to you. So no hanky panky with anyone else.”
Jack looked a bit upset. “Really?”
“Yes. Rose was rather keen on this. I think she enjoyed seeing me forcibly ignore any other advances made on me, all in her honour. She hated it whenever there was another woman about.”
“Just as you did when there was another guy.”
“Yes, well, I didn’t trust you. And with good reason too, you nearly destroyed the human race!”
“It was an accident!” Jack exclaimed. “And I thought we got over that!”
The Doctor looked down. “Well.” He turned the cube sharply to the left. “Look. Just try and show her she’s the only woman you’re interested in.”
Jack nodded. “Alright. Then…?”
“Then you hope like hell and run Rhys down whenever you can.”
Jack snorted. “Great. Thanks, Doc.”
“You’re welcome.”
He set the cube down quietly, and got to his feet. “You’ll be fine, Jack. Just flash her one of your grins every now and then, and she’s lost.”
Jack laughed as the Doctor turned and walked towards the door.
“Doctor?”
He stopped, one hand on the doorpost.
“Did those tips work with Rose, then?”
The Doctor bowed his head, and smiled to himself. “Every time,” he murmured, then he started walking again, leaving the office.
Jack smirked to himself, already plotting the seduction of Gwen Cooper. Away in his thoughts, he absentmindedly picked up the golden cube, only to discover that it was somehow broken in two. He snapped his head up.
“Doctor!”
There was a skidding noise and a flash of brown trench coat in the dark Hub, as the Doctor hot-footed it away, tout suite.
xx
Thanks for reading! Please review!