How To Shoot a Free Throw
seriously, here's the thing. sometimes it's easy to get down on yourself. and i'm not talking jive for masturbate. it's easy to think you're not good enough. not talented enough. not tall enough. not wiiiiiiiiiide enough. not thin enough. not pretty enough. not smart enough. not hung enough. i know about this. i know about this because fo twelve years, i have been just that. not _____ enough. not confident enough. not commited enough. not driving enough. but about a month ago, while watching a basketball contest between the denver nuggets and the atlanta hawks, i was struck deep in the shadows and baskervilles of myself. struck by a young man, an atlanta hawk. but when i saw him, he was not a hawk. he was an eagle. no. he was a ROC, that gigantic mythical bird of prey that could carry off elephants into the great greek sky and block out the sun! and i discovered something. i discovered... this:
Inspirational Piece
Josh Childress of the Atlanta Hawks
Has an explosion on his head.
An explosion of black velveteen
Blooming like a glorious flower of Africa.
His Afro is the perfect sphere of life
A tiny little world
Turning on a tiny little man
On the worst basketball team in the world.
At two wins and fifteen losses,
Soon to be two wins and sixteen losses,
The Atlanta Hawks are far and away
The worst team in the NBA.
But Childress’s Afro speaks of victory
It is his trophy, his bottle of Cristal, his
High priced and outrageously beautiful
Prostitute waiting dark and sultry
In the presidential suite of his personal championship
It is his victory parade.
So record be damned.
Score be damned.
Fans booing, the Children of Georgia,
Hanging their heads on playground courts
As if wishing the asphalt to erupt with new hardcourt heroes
With the ability to bust out a W
Be damned!
Josh’s Afro will shine and burn like a dense ebony sun
In the cold Southern sky
And melt them all away.
I am not an attractive man.
My body sags like a mountain and it looks like
I’m wearing a full backpack on the front.
But Josh Childress’s Afro shines in me
And I will hit on the most beautiful woman in the world
And I will get rejected
But I will not drop my shoulders and sigh
I will not weep into one more donut
I will not stroke my aching penis alone
In my shower with all the lights off
One more night in this Life.
No! Instead I will stroke that brilliant gleaming hairdo in my soul
I will square my shoulders and roar
And hit on a woman even more pulchritudinous than the first!
And she will laugh in my face and
Ask me if that’s the way mommy taught me to talk to girls
And then walk away and wiggle her ass extra sexy
To let me know exactly what it is I’m missing
Yes! She too, inevitably, will reject me.
But I say rejection be damned!
Because I am Josh Childress!
And I will celebrate the Afros of my talent, of my kindness,
Of my magnificent face full of hair,
I will celebrate the Afros of my height, my unique homeless lumberjack fashion sense,
And my intelligence, my sense of humor, my culinary skill, and my pretty accurate jump shot
I will celebrate all of my Afros in the snarling face of adversity.
And you are Josh Childress
And your own Afros, be they Afros of music,
Afros of athleticism, Afros of literature, Afros of logic, Afros of bravery,
Afros of mathematics and science, Afros of blacksmithing or woodcrafting prowess, Afros of technological wizardry, Afros of magic, Afros of gold, Afros of love, or an Afro all your own
Will stand firm and circular,
Immaculately groomed
As shame
Defecates
On your spirit
Over and over again.
You are Josh Childress.
I am Josh Childress.
And Josh Childress is Inspiration.
Because in a world full of shit and winners
Every loser needs to find a little bit a beauty to hold onto.
since that night, the atlanta hawks have improved their record to a still tepid 11 wins and 29 losses. our hero averages 8.6 points a game, 5.10 rebounds a game, 1.6 assists a game, and 1.20 steals a game. He also ranks ninth in the NBA in steals per turnover (1.02). not bad for a second year swingman out of stanford playing on one of the worst teams in the league. but the worst? not anymore! that honor belongs to the charlotte bobcats, who edge the hawks out at 11 wins and 32 losses. but hey. i bet there's an Afro to be found there too.
the atlanta hawks play next on january 27th (tonight), 7:00 pm est, against the pacific division first place phoenix suns. i wish i could say i was rooting for my boy in this one. but i can't. i'm a pretty big suns fan.
Inspirational Piece
Josh Childress of the Atlanta Hawks
Has an explosion on his head.
An explosion of black velveteen
Blooming like a glorious flower of Africa.
His Afro is the perfect sphere of life
A tiny little world
Turning on a tiny little man
On the worst basketball team in the world.
At two wins and fifteen losses,
Soon to be two wins and sixteen losses,
The Atlanta Hawks are far and away
The worst team in the NBA.
But Childress’s Afro speaks of victory
It is his trophy, his bottle of Cristal, his
High priced and outrageously beautiful
Prostitute waiting dark and sultry
In the presidential suite of his personal championship
It is his victory parade.
So record be damned.
Score be damned.
Fans booing, the Children of Georgia,
Hanging their heads on playground courts
As if wishing the asphalt to erupt with new hardcourt heroes
With the ability to bust out a W
Be damned!
Josh’s Afro will shine and burn like a dense ebony sun
In the cold Southern sky
And melt them all away.
I am not an attractive man.
My body sags like a mountain and it looks like
I’m wearing a full backpack on the front.
But Josh Childress’s Afro shines in me
And I will hit on the most beautiful woman in the world
And I will get rejected
But I will not drop my shoulders and sigh
I will not weep into one more donut
I will not stroke my aching penis alone
In my shower with all the lights off
One more night in this Life.
No! Instead I will stroke that brilliant gleaming hairdo in my soul
I will square my shoulders and roar
And hit on a woman even more pulchritudinous than the first!
And she will laugh in my face and
Ask me if that’s the way mommy taught me to talk to girls
And then walk away and wiggle her ass extra sexy
To let me know exactly what it is I’m missing
Yes! She too, inevitably, will reject me.
But I say rejection be damned!
Because I am Josh Childress!
And I will celebrate the Afros of my talent, of my kindness,
Of my magnificent face full of hair,
I will celebrate the Afros of my height, my unique homeless lumberjack fashion sense,
And my intelligence, my sense of humor, my culinary skill, and my pretty accurate jump shot
I will celebrate all of my Afros in the snarling face of adversity.
And you are Josh Childress
And your own Afros, be they Afros of music,
Afros of athleticism, Afros of literature, Afros of logic, Afros of bravery,
Afros of mathematics and science, Afros of blacksmithing or woodcrafting prowess, Afros of technological wizardry, Afros of magic, Afros of gold, Afros of love, or an Afro all your own
Will stand firm and circular,
Immaculately groomed
As shame
Defecates
On your spirit
Over and over again.
You are Josh Childress.
I am Josh Childress.
And Josh Childress is Inspiration.
Because in a world full of shit and winners
Every loser needs to find a little bit a beauty to hold onto.
since that night, the atlanta hawks have improved their record to a still tepid 11 wins and 29 losses. our hero averages 8.6 points a game, 5.10 rebounds a game, 1.6 assists a game, and 1.20 steals a game. He also ranks ninth in the NBA in steals per turnover (1.02). not bad for a second year swingman out of stanford playing on one of the worst teams in the league. but the worst? not anymore! that honor belongs to the charlotte bobcats, who edge the hawks out at 11 wins and 32 losses. but hey. i bet there's an Afro to be found there too.
the atlanta hawks play next on january 27th (tonight), 7:00 pm est, against the pacific division first place phoenix suns. i wish i could say i was rooting for my boy in this one. but i can't. i'm a pretty big suns fan.