The Journey
The Journey
Charlie looked at her wristwatch. It was just past midnight, San Francisco time, back on Earth. Time didn’t mean a lot to her these days. Not even before she left Earth behind. Not since Justine had… Nevermind. It was best not to dwell on the unpleasant. She wouldn’t have wanted that.
Looking out the window of her ship, just the sheer vastness of space was enough to take her breath away. Without Earth’s pesky atmosphere getting in the way the view was unobstructed, unfiltered, and undeniably one of the most beautiful sights she’d ever laid her eyes on.
“We always knew you would make it out here someday,” Justine’s voice said as she wrapped her arms around Charlie from behind and rested her chin on her shoulder. “It was always your dream to explore.”
“I was supposed to be with you,” Charlie replied as she found herself tilting her head to meet Justine’s and finding only empty space.
She closed her eyes tightly and sighed. Justine wasn’t really there. She couldn’t be.
She opened her eyes and found Justine’s looking back. “Why do you still wear that silly thing?” Justine asked, gesturing towards the wristwatch.
“It-It’s the only thing I have left to remember you by,” Charlie answered, knowing full well she was talking to herself. “I had to leave everything else behind.”
“It’s just a thing,” Justine said as she reached a hand out to brush away a tear from Charlie’s cheek. “You have all of this to remember me by.” As the words left her mouth she faded away and her eyes turned into distant stars.
“It’s just… It’s just hard. I’m not ready to let you go. Not yet.”
But only the distant stars were there to hear her.
Charlie had been on her own for two years to the day now. The apparitions were starting to get more frequent. The scientist in her told her that it was just a product of her lonely mind, a figment of her imagination that she had unconsciously dredged up to keep herself from going crazy. But it was getting harder to see the line where sanity stopped. Maybe she had already crossed it.
She touched the window in front of her, where Justine had been just a moment before. It was cold. She was too used to warmth. From the Sun. From Justine’s body. But all of that warmth seemed like a distant memory. As distant as the stars in Justine’s eyes.
Charlie shook her head and tried to focus on the task at hand. She was heading for the next star. She knew she was way out of the solar system by now. The Sun was unrecognizable from any of the other stars at this distance. But it still seemed like her destination was so far away.
“What was it all for?” She asked herself as she sat down and hugged her knees to her chest.
“You’re being silly again,” Justine said, sitting next to Charlie. “What was it you were always telling me?”
“For the love of the journey,” she answered softly.
“For the love of the journey!” Justine shouted, throwing her arms in the air with a smile on her face. “It didn’t matter if it was a journey to the top of a mountain, or through a forest of pages in a book. The mystery was always what mattered. The top of the mountain or the end of the book was nothing compared to the joy of the constant discovery of the unknown.”
“The more I learned, the more I realized how little I knew. The same was true with you. Whenever I thought I knew you completely, you would always surprise me with something new.” She smiled at Justine. “You were a mountain I never wanted to stop climbing.”
“I know. I felt the same about you. But now you’re on a different journey. And so am I.” Justine shrugged. “Besides, eventually we’re bound to meet up on the same path. So, in the meantime, neither of us should stop exploring.”
Charlie nodded. She didn’t want to climb a different mountain just yet, but she supposed that she had other things to do. Besides, Justine wasn’t really the one talking to her. It was her own mind telling her to move on.
“Can I take just one more step?” She asked. Then she leaned in and kissed Justine on the lips. She expected there to be no physical feeling, to fall through Justine as she had done before. But their lips met and they tasted just as sweet as she remembered.
When she pulled back, Justine was smiling at her softly. She took Charlie’s hand in her own. It felt warm.
“I don’t think you’ll be needing this anymore,” Justine said, as she removed the watch from Charlie’s wrist. They both watched it fall to the floor and out of sight.
“Now you can continue on your journey.”
“But it still feels like such a far way to go.”
Justine smiled again and said, “Oh, I think you’ll find that you’re a lot closer than you think.”
Charlie stood up and went to the window again. There it was. The next star. It shone in her eyes brightly, but not blindingly. “It’s so beautiful,” she said. “Justine, you should see this.” But she didn’t turn around, because she knew there would be nobody behind her.
She had to do the rest of this journey alone.