It wasn't quite what it seemed.
-Sigh-
I feel so restless, and very confused. I can look at the sky and for the first time not have any faith in the starz. My heart is full of regrets, and convictions I can't deny any longer. I know it's not right to run, but I can't breathe!!! In the fall I am leaving this area. I'm going to leave 'home.' I have two wonderful places in mind. One place is too close to home, it will be littered with the very people and behaviors I am trying to regain my breathe from. My mental state is so poor today. I have horrible dreams every night, about fighting, rapes, stealing, and ODing. I don't understand what is going on. the very things that I thought were my stability, I am begining to doubt. My grandma is getting weak, and my heart gets so full of sadness when I see her struggle. What can I do for her?! I have to leave this place. Too many sad, depressing days ..minutes, hours, walks, conversations, writting, done here. Please God, no matter how weak I get, please remind me too never give up.
Where's my father when I need him?! Oh, that's right, never met him. Where are you?!
I feel so restless, and very confused. I can look at the sky and for the first time not have any faith in the starz. My heart is full of regrets, and convictions I can't deny any longer. I know it's not right to run, but I can't breathe!!! In the fall I am leaving this area. I'm going to leave 'home.' I have two wonderful places in mind. One place is too close to home, it will be littered with the very people and behaviors I am trying to regain my breathe from. My mental state is so poor today. I have horrible dreams every night, about fighting, rapes, stealing, and ODing. I don't understand what is going on. the very things that I thought were my stability, I am begining to doubt. My grandma is getting weak, and my heart gets so full of sadness when I see her struggle. What can I do for her?! I have to leave this place. Too many sad, depressing days ..minutes, hours, walks, conversations, writting, done here. Please God, no matter how weak I get, please remind me too never give up.
Where's my father when I need him?! Oh, that's right, never met him. Where are you?!