The days keep coming without fail..a new wind will fill your sail. Thats where your journey begins.
Today's been..okay, to say for the most part. I went to school and just kinda hung out. no big highlights...did hip hop in dance.
Wanna know something? It sucks, when you think you've reached a point in your life to where you're so passionate about something, then all of a sudden something happens, and you just dont care about it anymore. It's like it use to make you so happy, and looked forward to having it there 5 out of 7 days a week. You work so hard, but now, all that hard work is just overlooked. one small thing, wether it be something someone says, or does, that totally kills what you love doing, and makes it more of a chore.
Its not supposed to be about how good you are, or what tricks you can do, or how much you can pay..its not about your score at competitions, or about how many trophys you get. It's about how you feel when you acomplish something you've tried so hard to get, even if its not perfect. It's being yourself, dancing for yourself..that is what dancing is ALL about..and now ive just seen the latter side of it all. I miss being at my studio, where things i did werent looked over, and i felt some sort of acomplishment. Now dancing is like something i feel like i'm forced to do, just like any other class.. because i've put so much time, and money, and effort into it, when really it doesn't even make me that happy anymore. I honestly feel like everything i've worked so hard for, has just been totally pointless. Everything that is ever said, is by judgement. you are judged on what competition team you make, what routines you are in, wether you are on Varsity or Jr varsity, and wether you get picked to be a so called "leader", and basically are told "you suck". Why does dancing have to be SO dang critical. WHO cares how many turns you can do, or how great your kicks are..i've learned, that if you REALLY love something..dont do it for other people, or for a "team". because chances are, that team will only judge you, when they don't even have room to talk. only God can judge you. do things that you love for YOURSELF, because only you can make yourself happy.
I know i'm saying this now, and i wish i knew it 3 years ago, before i made the dance team. I did have a big passion for dance, but now, i only feel judged, and criticized, and that's not what dancing is about..at all. When people start saying "you can't do this, because of your "inabilty to pay" is when things get messed up. NO person, or GROUP, should ever have to tell you that what you love, is being put on hold, just because you were born from a less wealthy family, or cant afford as much as the rest of your team mates can.
when you are a part of a team, you're supposed to feel ONE with the team. you are supposed to dance as a team, work as a team, and such.. but you know what? I really just dont care anymore. Dancing has played a big part in my life, and dance team has just killed it. now i can finally say, that i just want it to end.
Wanna know something? It sucks, when you think you've reached a point in your life to where you're so passionate about something, then all of a sudden something happens, and you just dont care about it anymore. It's like it use to make you so happy, and looked forward to having it there 5 out of 7 days a week. You work so hard, but now, all that hard work is just overlooked. one small thing, wether it be something someone says, or does, that totally kills what you love doing, and makes it more of a chore.
Its not supposed to be about how good you are, or what tricks you can do, or how much you can pay..its not about your score at competitions, or about how many trophys you get. It's about how you feel when you acomplish something you've tried so hard to get, even if its not perfect. It's being yourself, dancing for yourself..that is what dancing is ALL about..and now ive just seen the latter side of it all. I miss being at my studio, where things i did werent looked over, and i felt some sort of acomplishment. Now dancing is like something i feel like i'm forced to do, just like any other class.. because i've put so much time, and money, and effort into it, when really it doesn't even make me that happy anymore. I honestly feel like everything i've worked so hard for, has just been totally pointless. Everything that is ever said, is by judgement. you are judged on what competition team you make, what routines you are in, wether you are on Varsity or Jr varsity, and wether you get picked to be a so called "leader", and basically are told "you suck". Why does dancing have to be SO dang critical. WHO cares how many turns you can do, or how great your kicks are..i've learned, that if you REALLY love something..dont do it for other people, or for a "team". because chances are, that team will only judge you, when they don't even have room to talk. only God can judge you. do things that you love for YOURSELF, because only you can make yourself happy.
I know i'm saying this now, and i wish i knew it 3 years ago, before i made the dance team. I did have a big passion for dance, but now, i only feel judged, and criticized, and that's not what dancing is about..at all. When people start saying "you can't do this, because of your "inabilty to pay" is when things get messed up. NO person, or GROUP, should ever have to tell you that what you love, is being put on hold, just because you were born from a less wealthy family, or cant afford as much as the rest of your team mates can.
when you are a part of a team, you're supposed to feel ONE with the team. you are supposed to dance as a team, work as a team, and such.. but you know what? I really just dont care anymore. Dancing has played a big part in my life, and dance team has just killed it. now i can finally say, that i just want it to end.