(no subject)
I meant to post this last week...or rather, I meant to finish out an e-mail for you last week, but since it didn' thappen...here's this portion.
Tuesdays are Sneaky...
About your anonymous comment - I don't think I can exactly thank you in the right way for that - I'm not sure how to or if I can...because it wasn't just a compliment. I hold onto a lot of things much too long...the bad the longest, for a lot of reasons. I think that for me to finally having the guts to say/ask that and not take it back (well, I did, but not officially, you see), and getting an answer, especially one like that, shook things around a little bit. Well, more than a little bit. I feel like asking anything like that is just seen as fishing for compliments...as if I want life to be all about me, and I can't stand people who do that. I hate doing things for myself, I'm horrible at receiving compliments, especially physical ones. I just don't feel like I'm really deserving of them, I suppose.
I really don't want to make you feel badly, and I hope this doesn't - but it was kindof freeing in a way...because the whole time we were together, you never said something like that. Sure, you'd call one of my best friends gorgeous, but you never mentioned me. I always wondered, but never felt like it was appropriate to really ask for an answer, especially because there were more important things to worry about, and doing something that might be considered vain just wasn't one of them. There are always more important things than what I'm wondering about.
Anyway, it was freeing, and helpful more than one would think. Oh, and it made my day. :-) For a few days.
edit: Oh, and you'll have your e-mail tomorrow! or something. Maybe tonight, but I'd like to wait until tomorrow morning since then I'll have time to talk with Andy&Tammy in the morning. I'd like to tell you how that goes. Maybe I'll write 2, one today one tomorrow? I suppose it depends on if you're awake with me tonight or not. lol. Now you're not going to come online...hah. Just so you can have 2 e-mails. :-P
Tuesdays are Sneaky...
About your anonymous comment - I don't think I can exactly thank you in the right way for that - I'm not sure how to or if I can...because it wasn't just a compliment. I hold onto a lot of things much too long...the bad the longest, for a lot of reasons. I think that for me to finally having the guts to say/ask that and not take it back (well, I did, but not officially, you see), and getting an answer, especially one like that, shook things around a little bit. Well, more than a little bit. I feel like asking anything like that is just seen as fishing for compliments...as if I want life to be all about me, and I can't stand people who do that. I hate doing things for myself, I'm horrible at receiving compliments, especially physical ones. I just don't feel like I'm really deserving of them, I suppose.
I really don't want to make you feel badly, and I hope this doesn't - but it was kindof freeing in a way...because the whole time we were together, you never said something like that. Sure, you'd call one of my best friends gorgeous, but you never mentioned me. I always wondered, but never felt like it was appropriate to really ask for an answer, especially because there were more important things to worry about, and doing something that might be considered vain just wasn't one of them. There are always more important things than what I'm wondering about.
Anyway, it was freeing, and helpful more than one would think. Oh, and it made my day. :-) For a few days.
edit: Oh, and you'll have your e-mail tomorrow! or something. Maybe tonight, but I'd like to wait until tomorrow morning since then I'll have time to talk with Andy&Tammy in the morning. I'd like to tell you how that goes. Maybe I'll write 2, one today one tomorrow? I suppose it depends on if you're awake with me tonight or not. lol. Now you're not going to come online...hah. Just so you can have 2 e-mails. :-P