Son of Awesomely Bad Books

[rachelmanija]

See post below for context, ie, if you guys don't entertain me, I can't guarantee I won't flee into the cold night in my jammies.

Last week lady_ganesh asked me to name and briefly describe the five worst books I'd ever read. I replied:

Oh God, SO MANY! How to choose?!

1. Robin Hobb's Forest Mage (The Soldier Son Trilogy, Book 2)

Comments

[copperwise]

The infamous book...the one that my review of garnered so much hate male from pre-adolescent future furries...David Clement-Davies' The Sight. Anthropomorphic psychic wolves...a depressed wolf who gets Oprah style counseling from an eagle about letting go of her guilt over eating animals...sadly, this is one of the reviews that has disappeared from the GMR site. But my gods, it was bad.

Marion Zimmer Bradley's The Firebrand. C-grade cheese with a graphically illustrated rape of a toddler just for shock value.

I was once given a Gor book. I was bored. I read it. Nuff said.

Emily Drake, The Magickers. Orphan boy is informed that he's a wizard...er, magicker and taken to a school...er, I mean a summer camp for young wizards...er, magickers, where he's sorted into the correct house...er, I mean cabin by a Sorting Hat...er, I mean Sorting Wishing Well. Seriously. No, really, I mean seriously.

The Clan of the Cave Bear series. First book, ok, moderately entertaining. Rapidly deteriorating into "oh my god you are kidding me please stop now please my eyes oh dear god my eeeeeeeeeeyes..."

[telophase]

Oh, lord, I read The Magickers. *twitch* *twitch* *twitch*

[gnarlycranium]

I read a Gor book once. If I ever run into the author on the street I'm going to carve out his eyes. Although not before letting him watch me feed his balls to him on skewers.

[helen_keeble]

OMG, 'The Shelters of Stone'! The entirety of which can basically be summed up as: I HAS A POEM. LET ME SHOW YOU IT. (again and again and _again_)

My only consolation for wasting an hour of my life on that book is that I read it in a bookstore, and thus did not even pay Auel library rights for the experience.