Mixed feelings.
I really don't feel like typing a long entry but there's nothing else to do so I just thought of writing rather than stare at the wall for hours. Today should be a good day for me because I got what I wanted. But I don't know I have mix feelings. I took my Chemistry final yesterday. I needed 193 points out of 250 to get an A in that class. I studied for it, I thought I was really ready for it. I did not expect to get a high grade though. I did not want to get my hopes up and get disappointed with the result so I just did my best so I could get the grade that I want. I got 212 out of 250. I'm really happy. I did not think I would get an A in that class because I almost did not make it. I never got an A on any of the exams. Chemistry made my brain sore! But... Yay! I got an A. I got all As in my classes. =]
I talked to Hanna this morning. I talked to her about my life. My uberly dramatic life. I don't even like drama. Even though my parents told me that they have forgiven me for sneaking out to go to Kyle's homecoming, I can still feel that there's tension between us. We're still not talking. Kyle picked me up from school yesterday and we went to the mall to go dress shopping for my graduation next thursday. He bought me two cute dresses. He was the one who picked them out too. *Sugar Daddy* Haha! When I came home, my older brother talked to me about what our mom told him. My mom told him that she doesn't care about me anymore and I can do what I want from now on. She also said that she won't pay for my tuition anymore. I went back to the living room where Kyle was and told him about it. My mom and I talked briefly last night; it was the first time talking to her since sunday. I told her I got my graduation tickets. She told me to give them to my dad and then went back to watching tv. She looked like she didn't care at all. I don't really know if they're coming to my graduation. I don't think they will come. I gave the tickets to my dad this morning, he just looked at me and didn't say anything. I really don't feel welcome here anymore. I think they're just letting me stay here because they know that I don't have anywhere else to go. They told me they don't want me to get married but they way that they're treating me right now, it's just making me think about getting married. But I don't want to though, not right now. We'll see how things go.
I also found out today that I got in at UMB. It's such a big relief because that's the only school I applied to and I was beginning to get worried if I got in or not. Actually, I'm not really sure yet if I really got in. Hanna and I were talking about it so I checked it online. And it said, "Decision: Admit-institution." Can you tell me what it means?... I couldn't believe it. I know what admit means but I went and double checked it in the dictionary to see if there was a negative meaning of admit. I didn't want to believe it. I let Hanna check it too. I need to see the hard copy to see if I really got in. Now my only problem is paying for college. It was really nice that I got an A in Chemistry because I need that to get a scholarship. I'm still waiting for the scholarship. If I don't get it, I'll just get a loan. I don't even care anymore if I'll have debt when I graduate. I just really want to finish college. I'll deal with the money issues after I get my degree.
I actually cried when I saw the decision on my computer screen. It just felt so good; tears of joy. I was really getting worried about it because I won't have anywhere else to go if I didnt get in. I just thought of the sleepless nights I had thinking about college and the situation with Kyle and my parents while Kyle was in Iraq. So can you imagine how hard it was for me to deal with deployment? It was 100x harder. I just really want to get my degree and get a life of my own. And I'll be going to my dream school!!! Isn't that great?! (Breathing hard)
I'll be moving to Baltimore soon. Thank you. I can't wait to get out of here and get my degree so I can support myself not depend on others. I should be really happy right now. Maybe if I got my admission letter saying that I really got in, I would be really happy. Actually I feel really good that I got all As in my classes because that means that my parents won't say anything bad about me and Kyle. They blamed Kyle when I got a B even though he didn't have anything to do with it. He is actually very supportive and only wants me to do really well in school. He believes in me when my parents don't. He keeps me grounded. He's my number one fan! And I'm his number one fan!
I feel really calm right now. I don't even want to think of anything right now. I just want to think about all the good things that happened. I'm graduating next Thursday. Happy happy joy joy... I'm finally out of PGCC!
My dream school!!! http://nursing.umaryland.edu
I talked to Hanna this morning. I talked to her about my life. My uberly dramatic life. I don't even like drama. Even though my parents told me that they have forgiven me for sneaking out to go to Kyle's homecoming, I can still feel that there's tension between us. We're still not talking. Kyle picked me up from school yesterday and we went to the mall to go dress shopping for my graduation next thursday. He bought me two cute dresses. He was the one who picked them out too. *Sugar Daddy* Haha! When I came home, my older brother talked to me about what our mom told him. My mom told him that she doesn't care about me anymore and I can do what I want from now on. She also said that she won't pay for my tuition anymore. I went back to the living room where Kyle was and told him about it. My mom and I talked briefly last night; it was the first time talking to her since sunday. I told her I got my graduation tickets. She told me to give them to my dad and then went back to watching tv. She looked like she didn't care at all. I don't really know if they're coming to my graduation. I don't think they will come. I gave the tickets to my dad this morning, he just looked at me and didn't say anything. I really don't feel welcome here anymore. I think they're just letting me stay here because they know that I don't have anywhere else to go. They told me they don't want me to get married but they way that they're treating me right now, it's just making me think about getting married. But I don't want to though, not right now. We'll see how things go.
I also found out today that I got in at UMB. It's such a big relief because that's the only school I applied to and I was beginning to get worried if I got in or not. Actually, I'm not really sure yet if I really got in. Hanna and I were talking about it so I checked it online. And it said, "Decision: Admit-institution." Can you tell me what it means?... I couldn't believe it. I know what admit means but I went and double checked it in the dictionary to see if there was a negative meaning of admit. I didn't want to believe it. I let Hanna check it too. I need to see the hard copy to see if I really got in. Now my only problem is paying for college. It was really nice that I got an A in Chemistry because I need that to get a scholarship. I'm still waiting for the scholarship. If I don't get it, I'll just get a loan. I don't even care anymore if I'll have debt when I graduate. I just really want to finish college. I'll deal with the money issues after I get my degree.
I actually cried when I saw the decision on my computer screen. It just felt so good; tears of joy. I was really getting worried about it because I won't have anywhere else to go if I didnt get in. I just thought of the sleepless nights I had thinking about college and the situation with Kyle and my parents while Kyle was in Iraq. So can you imagine how hard it was for me to deal with deployment? It was 100x harder. I just really want to get my degree and get a life of my own. And I'll be going to my dream school!!! Isn't that great?! (Breathing hard)
I'll be moving to Baltimore soon. Thank you. I can't wait to get out of here and get my degree so I can support myself not depend on others. I should be really happy right now. Maybe if I got my admission letter saying that I really got in, I would be really happy. Actually I feel really good that I got all As in my classes because that means that my parents won't say anything bad about me and Kyle. They blamed Kyle when I got a B even though he didn't have anything to do with it. He is actually very supportive and only wants me to do really well in school. He believes in me when my parents don't. He keeps me grounded. He's my number one fan! And I'm his number one fan!
I feel really calm right now. I don't even want to think of anything right now. I just want to think about all the good things that happened. I'm graduating next Thursday. Happy happy joy joy... I'm finally out of PGCC!
My dream school!!! http://nursing.umaryland.edu