Café Mocha: (Essential Child Raising Agent) Chapter Four
Title: Café Mocha: Essential Child Raising Agent
Pairing: Jack/Ianto
Genre: Romance, Humour
Rating/Warning/Spoilers: Adult concepts, Possibilities of some strong language, Subtle hints for season three
Summary: One night something unexpected comes through the rift and shocks the team.
In which Ianto finds a part of him he never knew he had, and Jack pervs on babies.
Author's Notes: Kudos to my wonderful beta Aaya, whose help has been immeasurable.
Disclaimer: I own nothing: it all belongs to Russell T. Davies. No profit is being made, and no copyright infringement is intended.
Previous parts: 1, 2, 3
“Right!” Jack said, picking up his coat and Ianto’s, “We’re going home, you won’t see us tomorrow.” He paused, and continued wickedly, “You might not see us the day after; I don’t know yet.”
Ianto handed the baby to Jack while he put his coat on, but didn’t get a chance to take her back from him as Jack wrapped his free arm round Ianto’s waist and led the younger man out of the building.
Gwen yelled at their retreating backs, “Oh, and Ianto!” She waited till he had turned round before she continued, “You got to name her by the time you come back to work.”
He smiled and continued to the door.
Jack was waiting for him in the car and handed Ianto the baby quickly. “She’s just done a poopsie in her blanket.”
“Gross!” Ianto said, holding her away from his suit.
Jack wrinkled up his nose as he steered the SUV out onto the open road, “I know. It smells bad, I don’t think I want to imagine what it looks like.”
Ianto glared at Jack, “How are we going to cope tonight? She needs clothes, nappies, bottles…”
“Relax,” Jack said as he turned the car in the opposite direction to Ianto’s house, “Tesco Extra is there for a reason.”
Ianto visibly relaxed. “And keep the receipts when you’re done,” added Jack as he raced through the empty streets, “You can hide them in an expenses report.”
“You are incorrigible,” Ianto responded, still holding the baby away from him. He squinted into the distance, “We almost there? My arms are hurting me. This baby just gets heavier.”
Jack laughed, “Yup, almost there.” He turned a corner, “You know you have to think of a name for this baby. We can’t just keep calling her The Baby.”
Ianto shrugged (as well as he could with a baby in his outstretched arms). “It’ll have to do for now. This is going to need some serious thought; generally people get nine months to think about this.”
Jack rolled his eyes and turned into the car park, “Call her Jack Junior.”
Ianto didn’t bother to dignify that with a response as he stepped out the car.
“Oh come on, Yan,” Jack called as he hurried after Ianto, “I was only joking.”
Ianto passed the baby off to Jack before he could react, “I know,” he found a trolley with a built in car seat then dropped a chaste kiss on Jack’s lips. “Come on; let’s get this over and done with.”
They walked into the store that was full of late night shoppers and split up.
“So,” Ianto said, talking to the baby as he pushed her down the aisles, “what kind of cot do you want? I mean, we have to get you a temporary one before I get the chance to buy you some proper furniture.” He stopped in front of a complicated looking travel cot. “Nice…” He turned the price tag over and his eyes widened, “Nice price too.”
She stared at him, her eyes wide and unblinking, and for a moment, Ianto saw his sister staring at him, the same blue eyes, the same nose-the resemblance was uncanny.
“Only the best for you,” Ianto said as he put the cot into the trolley, “besides, if we didn’t have this; you’d have to sleep in a draw or something.”
He tickled her in the stomach and continued pushing the trolley down the aisle.
“Ianto!” Jack called as he searched the shop for his errant lover, before catching sight of Ianto holding up a box of one hundred and eighty six nappies, “Only twenty three pounds?” He asked as he caught sight of the price, “Not bad. Anyway, Ianto, look at this dress I found!” He held up a little blue pinafore, grinning manically, “Isn’t it so cute?!”
Ianto laughed at how hyper Jack was getting about baby clothes. “Tell you what; I’ll get her essentials and you grab her clothes, since you’re having so much fun.” Jack put the dress in the trolley and pressed a chaste kiss to Ianto’s lips.
“Tell you what,” Jack said, picking up a baby changing kit off a shelf and grabbing the baby out the trolley, “I’ll go pay for this and change her.”
The prospect of having a baby around that didn’t smell pleased Ianto so he agreed, watching the two of them leave. He sighed before he moved forward down the aisle, picking out a car seat.
Five minutes later and the trolley was full of other items that Ianto decided were essential. Jack returned with a clean smelling baby to find Ianto standing in front of baby bouncers.
“Do you think she’s going to need one?” Jack mused, as he placed the baby in the trolley.
Ianto shrugged, “Well she’s going to get bored in the office isn’t she?”
“You’re going to bring her in to work?” Jack asked, surprised that Ianto had made the decision to stay at Torchwood so quickly.
Ianto sighed, “If I get an au pair, I’d feel like I’d lose her to someone else and if I leave Torchwood I’d feel like I lost you.” He turned to Jack with a smile on his face. “I want to have the best of both worlds. My parents both worked and managed to raise me and my sister just fine.”
Jack smiled at how stubborn Ianto could be. “Isn’t it going to be dangerous for the baby?”
“I’m not going to take her out Weevil Warring, Jack,” Ianto muttered defensively as he smiled down at his baby in the trolley, “and if anyone tries anything…” He turned to give Jack a bone chilling smile. “I’ll see that they live to regret it.”
“Woah,” Jack said feeling lost between worried, scared and aroused, “I think we need to continue this conversation at home.”
Ianto nodded and turned the trolley round towards the food aisles, “And I need to spend some more thinking about my options. I mean I’m responsible for this little person; the decisions I make now are going to shape her life.”
Jack kept up with Ianto’s fast pace easily, wondering where he was going. “You’re worrying about this far too much Ianto. I mean, with you as a parent, this little girl’s going to grow up to be a fine young woman.”
Ianto stopped and smiled as he started loading baby food into the near full trolley, “I’m glad one of us has such faith in me.”
“Don’t be so negative,” Jack said as he started pushing the trolley to give Ianto a break, “you’ll be fine.” He paused, surveying the trolley, “Is that everything? Do we need anything else?”
“I think that’s everything,” Ianto nodded, then grinned, “If we need anything we can ask Gwen to bring it round; no doubt she’ll need an excuse to come and see the baby.”
Jack laughed and started unloading the goods onto the conveyer belt.
The girl working on the till looked half asleep but when she caught sight of Jack perked up, “Hiya, nice night to be buying…” she looked at the items on the belt, “…baby things?”
Her eyes widened further when she caught sight of Ianto and the baby. Ianto rolled his eyes and put the baby in the car seat which she had already scanned.
He smiled down at her as she yawned, “Now, isn’t that more comfortable?”
Chapter Five