The Ravings: September 8, 2009 - Charity
/me laughs softly.
This is... remarkable. The UW has given me a bunch of address labels to show my Husky Pride. Oh dear. They're actually quite pretty, if only I had any reason whatsoever to use them. =D
And of course they're asking for more money, which is probably why I got this in the first place. ^_^ I imagine most of the people I know would be surprised and incomprehending were they to find out how much of my money ends up going to charities that I don't track.
It's irresponsible of me, really, but for me, it's a conviction of faith. I believe that some reasonably significant percentage of that money ends up where they say it does, and I find the institutions themselves to be important enough, and not corrupt enough, to be worth keeping around. But I couldn't prove any of this, even superficially; it's an intuition, largely, and thus it is a faith.
Despite what I say, and what others have said of me, I am an optimist. There is no other reason to live. There is conviction, and there is death. Most people are willing to be mediocre in most ways, to be personally fulfilled by a life where they make themselves and do not too badly for themselves. For myself, I cannot bear mediocrity. I choose to believe in my own inferiority largely to give myself something to strive for, and to temper my own arrogance. It gives me a coward's complex, but it keeps my eyes open. It keeps me searching, moving, vigilant.
Ironically, then, my charity is a fallback plan. If I myself am not sufficient to do good, then I've tossed my stones and let the ripples fan out into the horizon. I've done good by proxy, which is adequate as a second choice.
Does it surprise you, dear reader, that I hedge my bets so closely? I suppose it is not worth saying, then, that I have a lot more in the way of fallback. =D
Afraid? Of death? Hah, not I. Viscerally, of course I am: I am inexperienced and unpracticed. But not in my cogitations. Every new day is just another iron in the fire. Webs are things to be danced across. Have to keep dancing, lest you fall. Hacky sack.
This is... remarkable. The UW has given me a bunch of address labels to show my Husky Pride. Oh dear. They're actually quite pretty, if only I had any reason whatsoever to use them. =D
And of course they're asking for more money, which is probably why I got this in the first place. ^_^ I imagine most of the people I know would be surprised and incomprehending were they to find out how much of my money ends up going to charities that I don't track.
It's irresponsible of me, really, but for me, it's a conviction of faith. I believe that some reasonably significant percentage of that money ends up where they say it does, and I find the institutions themselves to be important enough, and not corrupt enough, to be worth keeping around. But I couldn't prove any of this, even superficially; it's an intuition, largely, and thus it is a faith.
Despite what I say, and what others have said of me, I am an optimist. There is no other reason to live. There is conviction, and there is death. Most people are willing to be mediocre in most ways, to be personally fulfilled by a life where they make themselves and do not too badly for themselves. For myself, I cannot bear mediocrity. I choose to believe in my own inferiority largely to give myself something to strive for, and to temper my own arrogance. It gives me a coward's complex, but it keeps my eyes open. It keeps me searching, moving, vigilant.
Ironically, then, my charity is a fallback plan. If I myself am not sufficient to do good, then I've tossed my stones and let the ripples fan out into the horizon. I've done good by proxy, which is adequate as a second choice.
Does it surprise you, dear reader, that I hedge my bets so closely? I suppose it is not worth saying, then, that I have a lot more in the way of fallback. =D
Afraid? Of death? Hah, not I. Viscerally, of course I am: I am inexperienced and unpracticed. But not in my cogitations. Every new day is just another iron in the fire. Webs are things to be danced across. Have to keep dancing, lest you fall. Hacky sack.