Why don't I drink?

[rabidrocker]

I got on tonight to type a pretty depressing post, but then I realized that that's all I ever do really. I hate it. I've been swinging in between depression and happiness like a bi-polar lately, no offense. When I'm with a certain someone, things seem perfect. I live in the moment. The second I leave her presence though, reality crashes back in. Enough complaining though. I've got a decision to make and it's pretty damn hard. It's the hardest decision i've had to make yet and it really sucks. I won't tell you my decision. Not a soul. It hurts so much right now. I can barely breath. I really have never felt this strongly about someone. You wonder why I hide things from you? I'll die if I tell them. lol.

Should I try to hide
The way I feel inside
My heart for you?
Would you say that you
Would try to love me too?
In your mind could you ever be
Really close to me?
I can tell the way you smile
If I feel that I could be certain then
I would say the things
I want to say tonight

But till I can see
That you'd really care for me
I will dream that someday you'll be
Really close to me
I can tell the way you smile
If I feel that I could be certain then
I would say the things
I want to say tonight

But till I can see
That you'd really care for me
I'll keep trying to hide
The way I feel inside

THat song describes it pretty well. How I feel at least. THere's a lot more to it. But that's all I'm willing to say right now. I know I seem like a little emo kid right now, but its' all I can do. why is this so hard. i don't regret anything, but I feel like i should. i want everyone to ignore the hell out of this post, even you. Please for me. I'm prolly gonna talk to you about this tomorrow anyway. Devin, I honestly do love you, more than you could ever know.