[fic] Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi - SJ(M) - Statistical Probability - oneshot
Title: Statistical Probability
Author: fonulyn
Rating: PG13
Warnings: MPREG
Pairing: Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, Han Geng/Heechul, Sungmin
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: They didn’t think it could happen twice. They were wrong.
Comments: The long awaited sequel to Why Louis Vuitton Should Make Maternity Pants and a part of the mpreg!verse. I know I wrote the first part like… a year ago and clearly, I suck :( but I hope you like this anyway. Basically it’s almost as fluffy and nauseatingly sweet as the first part! \o/ Except now the role of the mommy changes.
This is dedicated to nashirah since without her insistent but endlessly patient nagging and reminding it would have never been finished. Ilubb ;~;♥ Also daidetre’s existence was vital for this to happen.
It isn’t like Kyuhyun thought raising children would be easy, but this is proving to be even more than he was prepared for.
First of all, he thinks, a few lousy months to prepare for it is so not enough. The first couple of months of pregnancy go by in such a haze, he doesn’t even really count them. Sometimes he wishes they wrote a manual for all this, so he could just go there and see what to do. Like, what is he supposed to do when his four-year-old daughter comes to him, beaming proudly because she spilled juice on the floor but cleaned it up herself. …wiping up the mess with her father’s new, expensive silk shirt. He can’t be mad at her then, now can he?
With Cheolhyun and Minhee, everything proves to be a challenge. They are happy kids, but along with the happiness comes such an amount of sheer energy that neither Kyuhyun nor Zhou Mi knows where it all originates from. They certainly have never been that hyperactive, at least not that either of them admits it.
Already when she was born, Minhee looked so much like Zhou Mi that everyone assumed she’d grow to be exactly like him. As a stubborn four-year-old she proves to be more like Kyuhyun, though. She loves games, everything from simple four-piece jigsaw puzzles to watching her father blow up spaceships. She could spend endless amounts of time just observing everyone around her, watching from big, clear eyes.
Meanwhile, Cheolhyun looks a lot like Kyuhyun but couldn’t be further from him personality-wise. The little boy loves going through the closet and pulls down all the clothes from the hangers, only to wrap himself in the nicest fabrics he finds. He loves getting dressed in the mornings since Zhou Mi lets him pick if he wants to wear his dark blue pants or his green-red striped pants. He has also already lectured Kyuhyun about his style, with all the determination and conviction of his four year old life.
Heechul says it’s almost scary. It’s like watching a mini-Kyuhyun and mini-Zhou Mi with switched personalities and he thinks it disturbs the balance of the world. He also loves teaching the children little pranks when no one else is watching, feigning innocence right afterwards. When someone asks he loudly exclaims how much he hates children and how they’re so inconvenient, but whenever a babysitter is needed he is the first one they call. He never says no.
“Cheolhyun get back here!” Kyuhyun raises his voice, not caring that pretty much every customer in the supermarket is looking at him by then. Or if not at him, then at his son, who is currently laughing and screeching as he runs along the corridor as fast as he can. The only reason Kyuhyun isn’t running after him is that he is not quite sure how well he could run with a squirming four-year-old girl in his arms without crashing them both into a shelf. Minhee would much rather run with her brother, but Kyuhyun doesn’t really feel like chasing two kids. One is plenty enough. Add a barking dog on a leash to the equation and Kyuhyun is pretty much screwed.
“Now get back here, or else - !” Unfortunately the ultimatum goes by unnoticed, if anything it makes the child speed up before he slips behind the stack of oranges. Great, Kyuhyun curses inwardly. Now it will take ages to get the boy give up on the hide and seek. “C’mon. Dad won’t be angry if you now come here and behave like a nice boy should,” Kyuhyun tries in the most patient fatherly voice he can manage. He doesn’t do very well.
Minhee giggles. “Daddy already is angry!” She announces, her smile so bright it seems to be enough to split her face in half. She squirms just a little and Kyuhyun adjusts her, shifting her better on his hip. The dog tries to use the moment to dash under a shelf but a gentle tug on the leash stops it. “No,” he denies, “daddy is just …frustrated. It’s dinnertime soon!” He explains to the little girl, who looks at him with all the worldly wisdom in her eyes. She pulls a little on the adorable pigtail Zhou Mi tied of her hair in the morning, managing to make it a little askew and Kyuhyun curses the way it makes his heart melt a little. He is never going to win with these kids.
“Alright,” he sighs in deep, circling around the vegetable stand until he spots the blue of Cheolhyun’s sweater. “Dad will get you ice cream.” He knows Zhou Mi won’t be happy about that, after all they agreed on no sweets before dinner, but he sees no other valid plan to salvage the situation. If only life was as easy as a video game. Thus far he’s found no logic in children though, and he can’t just pause them when he needs a break.
The mention of ice cream works though. Cheolhyun is beaming as he pads around the veggies and runs back to his father, hugging his leg as tight as he can. “Swawbewwy!” He demands and Kyuhyun grabs his little hand as a reassurance that he won’t be running away again. “Strawberry,” he agrees.
After he promises that the twins can both ride in the shopping cart he gets them to calm down, even if he bypasses half of the items on the list. Who needs fabric softener anyway, they can very well do without it if it means he gets to live a little longer. As he grabs the children their ice creams he makes sure to pick himself an extra large one.
Next time, he thinks, he should put the twins on a leash. The dog can run free.
“Mommy, mommy!” Minhee screams as soon as the door opens, dashing off to find the person in question. With endless patience Zhou Mi has tried to make the twins call them both dad, or any variation of that, but Kyuhyun already made sure they would always refer to Zhou Mi as mommy. He likes it that way. With time, Zhou Mi adapts to it too, instead of always frowning when he is addressed.
The happiness on her features is indescribable when Zhou Mi rounds the corner and crouches down to her level, a bright smile on his face. “Oh hey big girl! Did you have fun shopping with dad?” He laughs as he wraps his arms around the girl and spins her around, her laughter joining his in mere seconds. “Yes!” Minhee nearly yells, in the midst of sunny giggles. “Daddy got us ice cream!” She beams, and only now Zhou Mi notices the chocolate stains on her round cheeks. He shoots Kyuhyun a look but only gets an innocent smile in turn.
“Is the dinner ready?” Kyuhyun asks nonchalantly, this time balancing Cheolhyun on his hip as the boy got tired of walking approximately two steps after they exited the store. That was to be expected, with all that running indoors. Kyuhyun reaches to plant a loud kiss on Zhou Mi’s cheek, which leads to Minhee loudly demanding a kiss as well. Of course Cheolhyun doesn’t want to be left out and thus he gets one too. Kyuhyun doesn’t remember ever being even half this snuggly in his whole life.
Thankfully, that seems to serve as distraction and Zhou Mi is smiling again, leaning down to let Minhee down on her own two feet again. “Yes, dinner is ready. Just go wash your hands - and your faces.” He grabs Cheolhyun to lift him off Kyuhyun’s arms and on the floor as well, and the twins dash off happily towards the bathroom. “I hope you’re hungry,” Zhou Mi smiles at Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun groans. “I hope you’re not. One of us has to make sure the food stays where it’s supposed to.” He can’t help but grin, though, especially when Zhou Mi steps closer and wraps his arms loosely around his neck. “I’m not hungry. Not for food…” He drawls, and for a split second they look straight at each other.
Until they burst out laughing. “That was awful, Zhou Mi,” Kyuhyun snickers, his eyes sparkling with sheer amusement. “You’ve been living with me for too long,” he says. Zhou Mi agrees.
They don’t get any further with that since suddenly there is loud screeching and yelling and barking and it sounds like a small natural disaster suddenly emerged in their bathroom. They both get a mild panic attack as they run to help, only to see that their medicine cabinet is no longer hanging on the wall but rather strewn all across the floor. Dinner has to wait a while.
It is the first day of day care for the children when Kyuhyun wakes up feeling like his guts want to climb out through his mouth. He doesn’t remember ever feeling this nauseous before and he spends a good moment in bed just counting the colourful postcards glued to the opposite wall, unmoving. He can hear the sounds in the kitchen; Zhou Mi is obviously preparing breakfast and judging by the yapping sounds their dog is trying to be as much of a bother as possible. Cheolhyun and Minhee are laughing and screeching, and the high pitched sounds of it make Kyuhyun close his eyes and wish he could teleport them away with magical powers.
He is still in bed ten minutes later when Zhou Mi appears in the doorframe, smiling at the bundle of blankets in the middle of the mattress. “C’mon Kyuhyun, I made pancakes. You still have time to eat before work if you get up now!” He chirps, unbearably happy at such an early moment in the morning. Zhou Mi practically waltzes to the window, opening it for some fresh air. “It was raining during the night so I packed the kids raincoats and I think they’ll wear rubber boots today,” he babbles on, approaching the bed now to perch on the edge.
The only answer Kyuhyun manages is an unintelligible garble. It’s not like he is usually pure sunshine in the mornings but this is weird even for him, and Zhou Mi frowns slightly. “Are you feeling well?” He reaches out to touch Kyuhyun’s forehead. “You don’t feel hot, though.” He muses out loud, gently rubbing soothing circles on Kyuhyun’s arm.
As a thank you, Kyuhyun promptly throws up on his lap.
The rest of the morning turns out hectic since Zhou Mi now has to shower, change clothes and get himself presentable before work, in addition to changing the sheets and feeding the children and making sure Kyuhyun is alright where he is crouched in front of the toilet bowl, retching his guts out. By the time he gets the kids dressed in their bright raincoats and rubber boots, he hasn’t had a second to even consider eating breakfast, and he throws a longing glance towards the leftover pancakes. He packs them into the fridge though, piling the unwashed dishes on the side of the sink.
“Are you sure you’ll be fine?” Zhou Mi asks as he pokes his head into the bathroom, frowning worriedly. “I called your boss and he said he’ll deal with things. You just need to go see a doctor when you’re feeling like you can. Ask him to write you sick for the rest of the week.” He babbles on and on, a typical sign that he is feeling restless. This isn’t the first morning Kyuhyun has been feeling nauseous, even if it’s the first time he’s quite this sick.
Kyuhyun waves it off, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. “I’ll live. Get the kids to day care.” He doesn’t even have the needed energy to go say bye to the twins, leaning weakly against the toilet seat. This is so unfair. It’s getting a bit too much to blame the sickness on food poisoning now that it’s been happening for longer, especially since no one else in the family is sick.
If there is one thing Kyuhyun hates, passionately, it’s doctors. Not them personally, no, but what they stand for and everything that has to do with them, from the clinic surroundings to hushed voices and faked sympathy. He knows he’s being unfair. Yet he can’t help it.
Still, he knows Zhou Mi will have his head if he doesn’t get checked up. And what’s left of him, his boss will grind and throw off a cliff. So, when the throwing up eases, he picks up his cell phone.
They all forget about that for a few days. Kyuhyun gets written sick and his doctor runs some tests, telling him he’ll get the results on the following Friday. It’s consequently the same Friday when the twins are having a sleep over with Kyuhyun’s parents. The grandparents are very insistent on spending as much time with the children as possible. Not that Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi mind, a day a week is mostly welcome rest.
After work, Zhou Mi gets the twins from day care and brings them to his parents, lured in by the mention of tea and cake, and he only manages to leave a couple of hours later. Finally he comes home to a pale, frozen Kyuhyun sitting on the couch. He looks like he has seen a ghost and Zhou Mi can’t help but to feel vaguely concerned. Swiftly he moves over, taking a seat right next to the other man, and rests his palm between his shoulder blades. “Was it something serious?” He looks straight at Kyuhyun from clear, worried eyes. He remembers very well that today was the day for the test results.
“No.” Kyuhyun shakes his head. He looks kind of desperate though, his eyes wide as he turns towards the other man. “Yes.” He nods, then harrumphs impatiently. “Kind of.” He obviously doesn’t really know what to say or what to do, sighing as he rubs his temples and runs his fingers through the mess of his hair.
Zhou Mi arches an eyebrow. “Kind of..?” Inwardly he is going through all the possible scenarios, his mind frantically trying to find an explanation. It can’t be anything too severe, now can it? There would have been other symptoms than throwing up and feeling nauseous, and if it’s a stomach flu then it could very well be taken care of and -
“Shouldn’t you know,” Kyuhyun snaps, interrupting his thought process. He pouts and it makes him look very young and very stubborn, defiance clear in his voice as he goes on. “You already went through this. Even if you didn’t have these horrible, horrible morning sicknesses. What did I ever do to deserve this?”
“What are you talking about, morning sickness? Wasn’t it a stomach flu or-” Zhou mi begins but then suddenly something snaps in his mind, something clicks just right and the realization dawns on him. “Oh. Oh.” His eyes widen. “You’re pregnant!?”
Kyuhyun’s answer is a deep sigh. “No shit, Sherlock.”
Turns out Zhou Mi is rather excited about the news. A part of him is delighted since now Kyuhyun will have to go through all the hardships he faced a bit over four years ago, everything from backaches to water in the legs and horrible mood swings. A part of him is content since at least Kyuhyun has no good excuse to make the new baby call him mommy. A part of him is just happy since now the twins will get a new friend to play with, amongst other things. He’s always loved children and having three of his own… well it’s three more than he ever thought they would get.
Turns out Kyuhyun is rather whiny now that he knows what’s going on. He acts like it’s the end of the world, making a huge number out of the fact he needs to go puke at least three times every morning. At first it works and he can blackmail Zhou Mi into doing everything for him, from reading the morning papers out loud to bringing him snacks and drinks every other second. That only lasts for so long. After a couple of weeks, Zhou Mi already skilfully ignores Kyuhyun’s complaints and lets him whine in peace. He still does Kyuhyun’s part of the chores though, practically holding up the whole household alone.
They wait until it’s been two months after the initial doctor’s check up. By then, Kyuhyun is so restless he feels like he absolutely needs to talk to someone about it. He has a strong feeling of déjà vu when he picks up his phone and calls his best friend. Sungmin picks up after three rings and it’s already quite reassuring to listen to him chatter on and on about what’s up. Sungmin asks a lot about the twins too, and Kyuhyun ends up describing their latest adventures quite animatedly.
Finally there’s a pause in conversation and Kyuhyun think this is it. This is now the good moment to spill his guts to his friend and get some much needed guidance. He clears his throat and even though he can’t see Sungmin he knows he’s listening attentively. “We… we’re having a baby again.” He ventures forward, thinking it’d be the best to get it out straight.
There’s silence for a second, then. “You knocked Mimi up again?” Sungmin sounds more amused than anything else. Except maybe surprised since honestly, the first pregnancy was already unexpected. The odds of a man getting pregnant are quite damn low, and for the same person to get pregnant twice? Statistical impossibility, pretty much. Then again so are two-headed calves and those are born too.
This is the hardest part. Kyuhyun steels himself. “Well, no. It’s me.”
The next fifteen minutes straight, Sungmin laughs.
Heechul’s reaction is similar. Three days later he and Han Geng come over to visit. It’s somewhat of a regular occurrence after the twins were born. Heechul calls it becoming old, and complains lengthily about how they’re now these old married couples sipping tea and eating biscuits. He doesn’t care that someone always points out they’re barely in their thirties, he simply waves it off and goes on with his rant. Heechul has always been selective with the reality he accepts.
Right now, he is staring at Kyuhyun over a cup of tea, his mouth hanging slightly open as he scans his appearance. Kyuhyun knows one can’t see the pregnancy yet, but he still feels self-conscious as Heechul’s gaze lingers around his waist as if to see if he’s rounded already. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” The words come bursting out and Heechul barely manages to set his cup down on the table. And that pretty much sums it all up.
Except of course Minhee has to be right there, right next to Heechul. She reaches up to tug on his sleeve. “Auntie Heehee,” she begins. The nickname makes Heechul shoot a poisonous glare towards Kyuhyun, who feigns innocence as usual. Minhee doesn’t pay any attention to that, still holding Heechul’s sleeve as she looks up at him from curious eyes. “What does ‘fucking’ mean?”
Heechul looks surprised first, then even moderately embarrassed, only to open his mouth to explain it. They all know he would probably give the actual explanation, but Zhou Mi decides his four-year-old daughter doesn’t need to yet know the mechanics of human reproduction. “It’s a very bad word and Heechul is going to apologize for using it,” Zhou Mi looks pointedly at Heechul who rolls his eyes but mumbles a sort of apology under his breath.
That seems to be enough for Minhee and she smiles, using the moment to climb up to sit on Heechul’s lap instead. Heechul doesn’t even say anything, instead wraps an arm around her and reaches for a chocolate chip cookie to hand over to the little girl. The scene is kind of heart-warming and for a second, Han Geng catches himself thinking it would be quite nice to have a little one in their family too. Then he thinks it over, imagining the dragon Heechul would be when pregnant, and thanks all the gods he can think of that he’s been spared of that.
“So, Heechul,” Zhou Mi begins after a second, his eyes shining happily as he looks at his friend, the smile on his lips so wide it’s nearly impossible. “We should go shopping for baby clothes!” He exclaims and instantly Heechul’s expression brightens and he agrees.
They seem to get a little addition to their shopping trip though, since the next second Cheolhyun speaks up in a determined voice. “I want to shop, too!”
Zhou Mi smiles affectionately at his fashionable little boy, ruffling his hair. “Of course you get to shop too.”
Kyuhyun frowns, though. “But we still have all the baby clothes from Cheolhyun and Minhee. It means we have both girl-clothes and boy-clothes, so we’re fully prepared! I didn’t pack the clothes into boxes so they’d just be lying around taking up space…”
“Aw don’t get so whiny,” Zhou Mi smiles as he leans in to plant a kiss on his cheek. “Those are so last decade! They’ve been out of fashion for years!” They all know that Kyuhyun will grumble and sigh and try to convince Zhou Mi it’s not necessary to spend another fortune on clothes, and in the end just give in since that’s what he always does.
A while later Han Geng takes the dog out with the children, assuring that it’s alright and that he can handle all three. He’s remarkably good with children and the dog knows him more than well, so they simply wish him a good time. The other adults move over to the living room, Heechul claiming the comfortable plush armchair as his own while Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi share the couch.
“You know,” Heechul shakes his head. “I still can’t believe this is happening. How the fuck can you be pregnant!?” He directs the disbelieving look at Kyuhyun, who automatically presses his palm on his stomach as if Heechul’s gaze is automatically radioactive and he needs to shield the life inside of him. Heechul doesn’t mind. “Shouldn’t it be like a… statistical impossibility?”
“It must be my super-sperm!” Zhou Mi sounds happy about it, his voice chirpy as he pulls Kyuhyun closer by an arm around his shoulders.
Kyuhyun sputters. “Hey, I knocked you up first!” He points out. No one listens.
“It must be,” Heechul agrees, leaning back in his chair with a long suffering sigh. “Well. Good luck with this. You’re going to need it.”
When Kyuhyun begins to show, it somehow makes everything more real for them. It’s like it’s the last sign to show they’re not dreaming, but it’s very much happening. It also triggers a change in Zhou Mi, much to Kyuhyun’s dismay.
That is why Kyuhyun finds himself in the midst of yet another phone-call to Sungmin. “He won’t let me do anything!” Kyuhyun tries to show the extent of his desperation in his voice. “And by anything, I mean anything! He thinks it might harm me somehow.”
Sungmin is eating something, crackers or chips judging by the crunching sounds every time it’s Kyuhyun’s turn to speak. Somehow it makes Kyuhyun feel like he’s just cheap entertainment for his friend, something like a fun show to watch with a bowl of popcorn. “Why does it bother you so much?” Sungmin asks finally, and one can nearly hear him shrugging. Figuratively speaking of course. “You get to laze around all day and do absolutely nothing.”
“Well, no,” Kyuhyun denies, a little bit annoyed. “I still go to work you know. It’s not like I’m breaking apart! I’m pregnant, not dying. But he seems to think it’s somehow…” He doesn’t know what to say, so he settles for making a frustrated noise, something between a harrumph and a growl.
“So he doesn’t let you …watch TV?” Sungmin asks to clarify.
Kyuhyun grumbles. “He does.”
“Game?”
“Yes.”
“Walk? Hold the kids? Wash the dishes?”
“Yes, yes and yes.”
Sungmin rattles off a few more suggestions and after receiving the same answer to everything he groans loudly. “C’mon, Kyuhyun, spit it out. What is the problem?”
“Sex, alright!” Kyuhyun cries. “Almost every time I try to touch him more… suggestively he smiles and kisses me and guides my hands away. Or tells me he’ll get some ice cream and comes back with a sappy movie. Or gets the twins! That’s a blow below the belt, seriously. He is depriving me!”
“Kyuhyun, I am not sure if I want to hear more,” Sungmin warns him, cutting off the exasperated monologue.
“Sorry,” Kyuhyun apologizes but goes on the next second. “I just feel like I’m going to explode soon. Or spend my coffee breaks at work jerking off.” He knows he is being slightly unreasonable. It’s not like Zhou Mi put him on celibacy and doesn’t give him any, it’s just that… well, he would want more. Lots more. Lots and lots more.
Sungmin makes an agreeing noise, obviously thinking of something. “Did you have sex while he was expecting the twins?”
“Yes,” Kyuhyun answers with a curt nod he doesn’t realize goes unseen.
“Then remind him of that,” Sungmin prods gently. “Tell him it’s no different now and you want him. He’s not going to kick you out of bed for suggesting it.”
Kyuhyun grumbles. “I guess so.” Actually, it doesn’t sound like a bad idea at all, and by this point he is ready to try pretty much anything. Usually Sungmin’s advice is worth taking, even if he might not admit it out loud. He still spends good fifteen minutes complaining to his friend how he is getting more and more frustrated, until Sungmin cuts him off and tells him to grow some balls and do something about it.
When Zhou Mi comes home with the children and their fluffy dog, Kyuhyun has already spread snacks and a board game right there on the living room floor. He cut apples and bananas, peeled mandarins and found fresh juice, trying to come up with a child-friendly buffet instead of having his family snack on crisps and candy all the time. He was feeling a lot calmer after his talk with Sungmin and was in a good enough mood to even hum to himself as he waited, flipping through a magazine.
As soon as he hears the door open there’s also enthusiastic barking and yipping, and in mere seconds a small ball of fur launches itself right at him. He laughs as he grabs the dog, ruffling the curly fur in a way that makes their pet even more enthusiastic to be back home. Somewhere near the door the voices of children are loud and clear, Zhou Mi’s rising above them to sternly tell them they should take their shoes off before dashing off to find daddy.
Soon enough Kyuhyun has two enthusiastic toddlers in his arms, both trying to tell him about the trip to the park at the same time so he has no idea who to listen to. Most of the explanation goes past without him grasping any of it, but he has to smile as he watches the rosy cheeks and the sparkling eyes, the enthusiastic hand gestures that get wilder the further the explanations get. “We got to play in the swings!” one of the twins exclaims only for the other to go on with “Mommy built us a sandcastle!” and it’s all underlined by the yips and bounces of the dog.
It’s chaos. But it’s the kind of chaos Kyuhyun never wants to live without. Somewhere in the midst of it all Zhou Mi leans in and steals a short kiss from him. It makes Kyuhyun smile, even though Zhou Mi’s nose is cold as it brushes against his cheek, and he reaches to tug on the man’s sleeve to make him sit down as well. “Snakes and ladders!” Minhee announces as soon as she realizes there’s the game in front of them, scrambling to get the red piece before anyone else. Cheolhyun is classier than that, picking the blue one for it matches his new sweater.
“Daddy is pink!” Minhee decides and drops the pink piece into Kyuhyun’s palm, looking expectantly at her brother to decide which one Zhou Mi would get. After a brief consideration Cheolhyun settles for the yellow one, handing it to their father with a bright smile. “It’s sunshine colour!” He explains happily. Kyuhyun decides that nothing else could be more fitting.
Kyuhyun has to fight down the competitive streak to accidentally lose the game when it already looks like he will win. Zhou Mi has never been good at games that require luck anyway, always joking that it just means his luck in love has to multiply to compensate. Followed by pointed looks at Kyuhyun, who sputters and exclaims he is worth plenty stupid board games, before kissing the grin off Zhou Mi’s lips.
They play three rounds before the twins get tired of it and afterwards spend the remainder of the afternoon eating the fruit buffet Kyuhyun had prepared, laughing and making funny noises together. When it’s bedtime for the kids Cheolhyun promptly refuses to brush his teeth before he is promised he gets to sit on Kyuhyun’s shoulders while brushing them. That, of course, means that Zhou Mi has to hoist Minhee up on his shoulders and their twins end up giggling and trying to push at one another while they’re standing in the small bathroom.
Finally, after what feels like a small eternity, the twins are in their beds, tucked under their blankets and fast asleep. Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun relocate on the couch, snuggling into the plush cushions and each other. “I am never ever going to read the three little piggies again,” Zhou Mi whines into Kyuhyun’s shoulder. “Never. I read it four times today! Four times!” He hisses, rubbing his nose into the other man’s shirt theatrically.
“Yesterday I read it five times,” Kyuhyun points out with a low chuckle that seems to rumble from somewhere deep in his chest, while he tangles his fingers into Zhou Mi’s silky smooth hair. “Which, I know, doesn’t break your record. What was it? Eleven times in one day?” They had never understood what had made the twins love that particular story so much, but they demanded it again and again and again until their parents were completely fed up with it and begun to form their own variations of the story.
“You know what,” Zhou Mi asks but doesn’t wait for an answer before going on, “when they turn eighteen I’m going to burn that book, I swear. Unless,” he thinks of something, sliding his large palm down Kyuhyun’s front to the round of his stomach. “Unless the newcomer likes it too. I guess we need to keep it then. For a while.”
The empty threat makes Kyuhyun smirk, but there is something that distracts him quite effectively. The touch is warm even through the thin fabric of his shirt and he shifts a little as Zhou Mi begins to rub gently, as if he is saying hello to the growing life inside of Kyuhyun’s body. It doesn’t leave Kyuhyun unaffected either, though, and he shifts until he can lift his leg a little and press Zhou Mi between his thighs.
At first Zhou Mi doesn’t seem to get it, not before Kyuhyun cants his hips a little and it makes their bodies rub together. “Kuixian?” He murmurs as he lifts his head a bit, tilts it to look up at the younger man from curiously sparkling eyes. It’s not like he doesn’t know what Kyuhyun is up to, he rather seems to be asking him why again, amusement clear in his expression.
“C’mon, the kids are asleep, it’s just the two of us…” Kyuhyun tries, and although he knows his voice always does things to Zhou Mi when he drops it to such low, sultry range, he practically holds his breath as he waits for a response.
The first reaction he gets is a chuckle. The second is a soft kiss. The third is an amused question. “How come you’re so horny all the time?” It doesn’t seem that Zhou Mi would be against the suggestion though, not judging by the way he is still moving his fingers slowly, drawing circles on Kyuhyun’s stomach through his clothes, lower and lower.
“I don’t know,” Kyuhyun whines. “Does it matter?” He is thankful that their couch is extra-wide when he shifts, practically pinning the other man between his body and the backrest of the couch. “I want you,” he purrs, ghosting his lips over the other man’s jaw. “Can’t we just enjoy it now before my belly will be the size of a beach ball and it gets in the way all the time?”
Zhou Mi doesn’t say anything at first, only captures his mouth in a wet, hot kiss. That’s all the encouragement Kyuhyun needs and he pushes one leg between Zhou Mi’s, shamelessly rubbing against him. Already the kissing and groping is enough to make Kyuhyun purr like a content cat, everything in his world aligning just right for once.
By the time he manages to work Zhou Mi’s pants open and push his hand inside, he is happily focused on the making out and shuts the rest of the world out. How could he not, with the way the other man is moving, making those low, sinful sounds in the back of his throat. “C’mon, help me,” Kyuhyun urges as he pulls back from a kiss, flashing what he hopes passes as a cocky smirk. “I need to get out of these pants and into you.”
At that, Zhou Mi grins. “Wouldn’t it be kind of freaky if we were both pregnant at the same time?” He tugs on Kyuhyun’s pants, twisting his fingers in a way that is completely, truly unfair. It’s not like he can catch a clear thought when he’s being touched like that.
Finally the meaning of the words sinks in. Kyuhyun groans. “It’s a statistical impossibility! Do you want me to do the math and present you the odds?” They both know he could, just to show he’s right. He doesn’t even wait for a response as he slips his long fingers underneath Zhou Mi’s shirt, marvelling in the feeling of the smooth skin beneath his touch.
Until Zhou Mi brings him back down to earth. “It’s statistically impossible for you to be pregnant, too.” He speaks with a devilish grin, and Kyuhyun could swear he enjoys seeing the baffled look on his face. And people say he is mean…
Kyuhyun sighs. “…second thoughts. You fuck me.” He rolls over with a low grumble, hooking his legs around the other man’s waist as he pulls him in for a kiss.
Some things never change. One of those things is Kyuhyun and his addiction to games. Addiction is at least what Zhou Mi calls it, half jokingly, as he tries to prod the other man into something more productive or social. Kyuhyun tells him it’s social enough: he is talking to Heechul while gaming, now isn’t he? Heechul counts as being social. “You’re just envious Heechul spends time online and isn’t out shopping with you,” he retorts, pushing at Zhou Mi with his toes. The taller man gives him a theatrical look, shaking his head slowly as he returns to his book. He isn’t even trying to hide the small grin though.
This is how they end up often when the children are napping: both sitting on the couch, Kyuhyun sideways with his computer propped up on his lap and his toes dug underneath Zhou Mi’s thigh. Zhou Mi might watch TV or entertain himself reading, and most often they don’t even talk. They simply enjoy the silent companionship. Until Kyuhyun ends up kicking Zhou Mi playfully to make him get some snacks, or until Zhou Mi decides it’s time to stop gaming and starts tickling Kyuhyun mercilessly.
Right now Kyuhyun is focused on the game, trying to beat Heechul for once. He used to win every time, but somehow recently he has been more than distracted. He blames Zhou Mi for knowing exactly how to grab his attention, and two little kids with endless energy and enthusiasm. Heechul tells him he’s making excuses. “I am not,” Kyuhyun frowns, setting out to destroy Heechul’s good mood with a surprise attack. It’s a new release, neither of them have been playing it for long yet.
“Oh yes you are,” Heechul’s voice sounds through the headset, cackling at him as he obviously forgot to watch his back. “And you are so losing, too.” He points out victoriously and despite his grumbles, Kyuhyun can’t really disagree. They keep on arguing absent-mindedly, their focus more on the actual game than the insults they mumble at one another.
For a while, Zhou Mi listens to Kyuhyun’s side of the discussion, amused. Sometimes he drops in a remark as well, gaining either disapproving looks from Kyuhyun or loud protests from Heechul. Finally Kyuhyun kicks him not-too-gently, informing him that it’s his duty to get his pregnant husband something to eat. Zhou Mi laughs, but obediently gets up and pads into the kitchen.
“You know, Kyuhyun,” Heechul speaks up after a while, sounding almost distracted. He probably is, judging by the way he blows up an entire battalion of Kyuhyun’s troops. “I’m surprised he hasn’t restricted your computer access yet.”
At first, Kyuhyun is too distracted cursing and swearing, and only when he manages to salvage at least something his mind catches up with him. “What? Why?” He demands, not appreciating it when people joke about his precious gaming time.
“Didn’t you hear?” Heechul asks and although he aims for a surprised tone, Kyuhyun knows he’s gloating. He so is. “Apparently there have been researches that the computer sends some …whatever, some radiation or waves or something. It’s not good for pregnant women.”
Kyuhyun refrains from pointing out that he is not a woman, since he isn’t too stupid to realize the pregnancy is the keyword here. “Does it mean..?” He asks slowly. Heechul cuts him off. “Yes it does. Bye bye games!”
“Listen, Heechul! If you will tell Zhou Mi I will personally castrate you and I promise it won’t be pret-”
“Tell me what?” Zhou Mi appears, of course, at the most inconvenient moment, frowning questioningly at Kyuhyun. Heechul laughs out loud, while Kyuhyun inwardly cries at the way his life is obviously going to suck from now on.
Kyuhyun still tries to explain it away but Heechul isn’t exactly helpful. And Zhou Mi isn’t stupid, either. In the end his computer ends up confiscated, locked in the top drawer of their dressed. Zhou Mi slides the key into his pocket and promises he still gets computer access. Sometimes.
The promise of some gaming every once in a while keeps Kyuhyun happy for only so long, before he realizes that he’s had to cut down on it so much he feels utterly deprived. He heaves a sigh, wondering when his life turned out like this, always something to crave he can’t have.
He is a good boy, though. For a few weeks. Then he begins to take out his frustrations on being even more demanding and clingy than he’s been up until then. Zhou Mi doesn’t seem to mind, sadly, so it’s time for more drastic measures.
That’s when Kyuhyun decides he can use the hours he’s home alone more effectively. He takes a few days to figure out where exactly Zhou Mi has hidden his laptop, but after that it’s all smooth sailing. Free, unlimited gaming, for several hours a day! It can’t really be dangerous, now can it? That’s surely just propaganda.
The first time Kyuhyun bumps into Heechul online is kind of an accident. Of course he knows Heechul plays on the same servers but he didn’t expect the other man to be there at this time of the day. Turns out, Heechul is skipping work and threatens Kyuhyun’s life if he tells someone. Kyuhyun instantly takes the opportunity to make a deal: he won’t tell anyone if Heechul doesn’t tell Zhou Mi he’s gaming again.
Their agreement lasts for a while, before Heechul gets bored of it. “I really think you should tell Seasoning about this. You’re kind of going behind his back.”
“You make it sound like I’m cheating on him,” Kyuhyun snorts.
“Well,” Heechul says, “in a way you do cheat him.”
There’s a brief pang of guilt in Kyuhyun’s gut but he pushes it off and harrumphs at his friend. “Shut up. What he doesn’t know, can’t hurt him! Now are we going to play or are we going to sit here blathering nonsense until my time is up?” He doesn’t receive more than a short agreeing sound, which instantly makes him grin. “Good, so now w-”
“Kyuhyun.”
Kyuhyun swallows hard. That isn’t Heechul’s voice and it doesn’t come from the headphones. It’s another, very familiar voice, and it comes from right behind him. He also knows he never gets called by his birth name in that tone unless he’s in trouble. Big trouble. Slowly, he reaches out to pause the game… second thoughts, he aborts the game altogether and clicks the laptop shut.
When he turns around, he tries the sweetest, most innocent smile he can manage. “Zhou Mi, I can explain…”
Kyuhyun kind of feels like a child when he receives the scolding of his life and is sent to bed without dinner. Not that Zhou Mi could stay mad at him for long, though, since in the evening he appears with a bowl of soup and a sandwich, even if he gives Kyuhyun a stern glare and tells him not to get up from bed.
In the morning they work out a compromise.
“Daddy, are you sure you want to eat that?” Cheolhyun asks his father, rather worriedly, as Kyuhyun is just about to shovel a generous spoonful of cake into his mouth. Kyuhyun frowns a little, setting the spoon back on the plate. That kind of was a slight hit to his appetite.
“What do you mean?” He asks.
Cheolhyun tries to jump on the couch but his legs are a little too stubby still, and in the end he has to use his hands as well to drag himself on the cushions. It’s painstakingly slow, but finally he’s sitting next to Kyuhyun, looking at him from clear eyes. “The auntie in day care says eating too much is bad,” he explains. “You’ve eaten much!”
Kyuhyun doesn’t even have the time to protest or ask for anything more, before Cheolhyun leans in and pokes his belly with his short index finger. “Look!”
Right then, Kyuhyun doesn’t have any idea whether he should laugh or just sputter indignantly. Zhou Mi, however, doesn’t have such qualms as he cracks up, laughing so hard he has to clutch his stomach helplessly. “Oh Kuixian,” he gasps through the giggles. “Our son has a point!”
Kyuhyun frowns. “I’m eating for two!” he protests.
That catches Minhee’s curiosity and she bounds over, her toys forgotten as she instead grabs Kyuhyun’s knee to signal he wants to be lifted on his lap. “Why is daddy eating for two?” she asks. “What does it mean? Can I eat for two, too? I want to eat for three!”
“Oh sweetie,” Zhou Mi smiles as he’s finally collected himself. He grabs Minhee under her armpits and lifts her up to sit on Kyuhyun’s knee, before patting her head softly. “You can’t eat for two, not like daddy does.”
“But I want to!” Minhee insists, a slight frown on her features. Cheolhyun looks like he agrees, even if he doesn’t say anything.
“Uhm.” Kyuhyun has no idea how he is going to tell the children they’re going to have a sibling. How do parents handle these things? “The thing is. There’s. You know. A baby?” Very eloquent. He’s almost proud of himself.
Zhou Mi chuckles as he sits on the couch as well. “Daddy means that you’re going to have a little sister or brother! But first, the baby needs to grow in daddy’s tummy.”
The twins look quite suspicious, as if they’re considering whether such a thing is possible or not. “Were we in daddy’s tummy too?” Cheolhyun asks finally, after a long pause.
“No,” Zhou Mi smiles. “You were in mine.”
“Both of us?” Minhee asks.
“Yes, both of you.”
The twins take a second to consider that, looking at one another. They seem to settle for the answer though, giving simultaneous nods. Minhee reaches out to pat Kyuhyun’s stomach, whispering something along the lines of I’ll wait for you little sister.
Cheolhyun, instead, turns to Zhou Mi. “Were you that huge too?”
“You know, Mi,” Kyuhyun muses out loud. He’s lying in bed right next to the other man, arm draped over his chest as he snuggles closer. Zhou Mi is focusing on a book he’s reading, but Kyuhyun is trying hard to come up with a way to get his attention back at him. Without flat out pushing his hand in his pants, that is. He is practicing his subtle. “Even your ears are pretty.”
“My what?” Zhou Mi turns his head and Kyuhyun can’t see the aforementioned bodypart any longer.
Kyuhyun makes a dissatisfied little grunt and tucks his nose between Zhou Mi’s head and the pillow, in the perfect gap left there just for him. “Your ear.” He mumbles silently, defiantly, and the next moment is teasingly breathing hot air against the sensitive spot beneath the other man’s ear.
“You’re horny again.” Zhou Mi concludes flatly. He doesn’t even look away from his book, but instead flips on the next page.
“And we have the perfect opportunity for some quality time together,” Kyuhyun purrs, shamelessly sliding his palm underneath Zhou Mi’s shirt to trace patterns on warm skin. Maybe it’s soon time for sticking his hand in his pants, subtle or not, he’s been controlling himself long enough.
Zhou Mi laughs. “But the kids,” he tries, lamely, and there is really no strength behind the words.
“Are asleep,” Kyuhyun fills in, placing a line of kisses on Zhou Mi’s jaw. He gets a low sigh of oh fine and Zhou Mi reaches to put his book away on the nightstand, so he can direct his attention where it rightfully belongs: to Kyuhyun.
In a while they’re so focused on one another that they barely register the first screech that cuts through the air. Zhou Mi only grunts and shifts a bit closer, pushing his leg between Kyuhyun’s, in an attempt to slot himself near without being too rough. There is a second cry though, followed by a third, and suddenly they land back to reality simultaneously.
Kyuhyun sighs and Zhou Mi smiles at him apologetically, as if it was his fault the children decided to interrupt. “Were asleep,” he sighs.
“Fuck,” Kyuhyun grunts, but nevertheless pushes himself off the mattress to go see what’s wrong.
Wherein Zhou Mi had to be forced into bedrest, Kyuhyun is the exact opposite. Even under normal circumstances he would gladly live in their bed and never get up, if only he could. It’s been his lifelong dream to hibernate through one winter, just so he doesn’t need to go through the bother to get up and dressed in the mornings.
Being pregnant has its good sides too, obviously. He is at least enjoying his days as a lazy bum.
Admittedly the moments he enjoys the most are the ones when the whole family is around him. They set up a television in the bedroom and thus the everyday tradition of watching evening cartoons is moved from the living room. Kyuhyun always gets the best place, propped up on pillows in the middle of the bed. Zhou Mi nuzzles close to him on one side, the twins choosing random spots depending on how they feel like.
Once upon a time the twins were the first ones to fall asleep in the evenings. Now their nights almost always end up in Minhee and Cheolhyun wrapping the sleeping Kyuhyun in blankets, kissing his forehead before they tiptoe out of the room. Zhou Mi thinks it’s absolutely hilarious.
One day, Kyuhyun is forcibly awakened from his afternoon nap when the sound of the doorbell ringing cuts through the air and jolts him from his sleep. It’s followed by quite insistent banging on the front door as well, and Kyuhyun already has a rising suspicion on who it could be. Even before he can hear the shrill “Open this door, Kyuhyun, or I will kick it down!” from the other side.
He waddles to the door as fast as he can, swinging it open only to be pushed aside by a clearly agitated Heechul. “Seasoning isn’t home, is he?” he asks, glancing at Kyuhyun shortly, before storming off into the living room. “Of course he isn’t, just my luck! Why is he the one working. Now I have to settle for you.”
Kyuhyun kind of wants to protest but he doesn’t get the chance, before Heechul spins around and gives him a once over, clearly looking distasteful. “…I hope to god I’m not going to get that huge.”
“What are you on, Heechul?” Kyuhyun asks, placing his hands on his hips. He does realize he looks like a frustrated hippo right now, but he can’t stop himself before it’s too late.
Surprisingly, Heechul doesn’t mock him for it, but instead sighs and drops to sit down on the couch. “I’m in the same boat as you now,” he sighs. “Although I am not sure if I like it.”
“You’re what?” Kyuhyun frowns.
Heechul groans. “I’m pregnant, you dipshit.”
Oh.
“Well,” Kyuhyun offers, lamely, “you will make a great mother?”
The next two hours he has to listen to Heechul go on and on about what an insensitive dick he is, and how he should never be allowed to have friends to console. Thankfully, Zhou Mi comes home then and he knows exactly how to handle Heechul. Before long the two end up squealing over some website with the most stylish baby-accessories available, and Kyuhyun silently escapes the scene.
Instead of walking, Kyuhyun waddles. He is also huge. As huge as Zhou Mi was, except he is only carrying one instead of twins. That is an endless source of amusement for Zhou Mi, who can’t stop from teasing Kyuhyun about it every chance he gets. That is how Kyuhyun already knows what’s going to follow when his better half gets that certain look in his eyes, looking at him with a thoughtful frown. “You know, Kuixian,” he drawls, “I think you gained a bit.”
Kyuhyun snorts. “I’m pregnant, Zhou Mi,” he says. “Of course I look fat and like I can’t possibly fit through any doorframes properly.” They’re folding the last load of laundry they washed and maybe he grabs the next shirt a little too roughly. No one needs to notice that though.
“No,” Zhou Mi says and shakes his head. “I don’t mean your belly. I mean your thighs. They look kind of squishy now. It’s cute though!”
Kyuhyun groans. This can’t end soon enough. “This is horrible!” he complains. “And you’re not helping. Where did that considerate and emphatic boyfriend go?” He’s nervous, he can’t help it. They both know that the baby might decide it’s time any day now.
“Don’t whine. I carried twins.” Zhou Mi’s voice is a little too chirpy, and his smile a notch too sunny. At least if one asks for Kyuhyun’s opinion on it. “You’re better suited for it anyway, you have sturdier, wider hips! If you were a woman, I bet you’d be a perfect build for giving birth.”
“You’re not helping,” Kyuhyun mutters. He knows his sulking will go unnoticed so he simply folds yet another shirt and carefully places it on the growing pile between them. “You should, I don’t know, cuddle me and bring me to bed and make me forget my aching ankles. Instead you just stand there and insult me.”
Suddenly, there’s a warm palm on his waist, soon joined by another. He closes his eyes as Zhou Mi slides his arms around him, pressing close to his back. “I’m cuddling you,” Zhou Mi practically purrs, the sound of it making Kyuhyun shiver a little bit in the embrace. “Want me to bring you to bed next?”
Kyuhyun takes one look at the pile of laundry that still needs to be folded. It only takes a split second and he covers Zhou Mi’s hands with his own, giving them a gentle squeeze. “Oh yes please.”
Finally the doctors decide they can’t wait any longer, it’s time for the little one to be born. The day of the operation it rains so much the roads are like rivers, the sky ripped open like the floodgates broke somewhere up there. Zhou Mi and the twins accompany Kyuhyun to the hospital and they’re given a single room, where the children spend their time being excited about every new item and machine they see.
Surprisingly, Kyuhyun is a lot calmer now that it’s him going into that operating room instead of Zhou Mi. It feels like their roles have been reversed in more ways than one. So when Heechul barges in with Han Geng close on his heels, uninvited, they both welcome them with bright smiles.
“I knew you would never survive through this without me,” Heechul sighs and waves his hand in the air. “I swear, once it’s my time to go through this you two owe me, big time!” He fusses over the blanket draped over Kyuhyun’s legs and makes Zhou Mi open the containers of food he smuggled in for them. Han Geng only watches, amused, trying to hold back all comments about Heechul already acting like a mother hen.
Han Geng ends up sitting on the floor with the twins, playing doctor with the random instruments they managed to find or steal in the hospital. They barely look up when Kyuhyun is taken away, waving at him and telling him to be a good daddy.
Zhou Mi is eerily pale, clutching on the armrest of the chair he’s sitting on. He tries to focus on the happy noises the kids make, the laughter that rings through the air in the room, the presence of his friends who he knows will be there throughout it all.
“It’s going to be fine,” Heechul smiles and squeezes Zhou Mi’s arm. It makes him feel a whole lot better.
“Mommy, mommy, look!” Minhee sounds so excited she might burst when she runs to Zhou Mi, her pigtails bouncing as she goes. She tugs on her father’s sleeve, distracting him from where he’s trying to feed the baby girl bundled up in the carriage. “They have cotton candy!” she says, as if it’s the best thing that has ever happened to her. As if all amusement parks don’t have that.
Zhou Mi laughs and digs into his pocket to see if he has some money. “Want to go buy some? Remember to get some for Cheolhyun too,” he reminds her, and instantly gets a serious nod as a reply.
“For the baby too!” Minhee announces, but Zhou Mi quickly shakes his head, explaining that the baby is too small for cotton candy. Kyuhyun agrees to go with her, seeing she’s so small she wouldn’t even reach over the counter to place her order. Meanwhile, Cheolhyun has found a collection of colourful rocks on the ground and is poking at them with a stick, as if they might suddenly come alive and attack him.
Soon enough the two return with their purchases, and Kyuhyun offers Zhou Mi a bite of his own pink and fluffy candy. “I figured they can share one,” he nods towards Minhee, who is already skipping over to her brother to offer him his half. The little dog is yapping next to them, displeased since he’d want to have a treat too, but they skilfully ignore him.
Kyuhyun doesn’t say anything, but Zhou Mi catches the longing glance he sends towards the Tornado, the newest death trap in the park. He grins, licking sugar off his lips. “I’ll watch the kids, you catch the wheel of death.”
“For real?” Kyuhyun’s eyes shine with enthusiasm. He gives a big, goofy smile as he leans in to peck Zhou Mi’s lips and thrusts the cotton candy into his hand. It’s been a while since he practically ran anywhere.
Zhou Mi laughs as he follows Kyuhyun with his eyes.
Zhou Mi watches Kyuhyun practically glow after the ride, tries to make the baby sleep again, changes Minhee’s puked on shirt and tells Cheolhyun for the umpteenth time he can’t have another ice cream.
He couldn’t be happier.
---
(9533 words)
add/subscribe | masterlist (LJ)/masterlist (DW) | request
THIS IS THE LATEST SEQUEL OF ALL LATE SEQUELS OMG I’M SO SORRY ;-; also /kicks fic/ this ate my soul. now can I have a life again.
I am also the slowest writer (or finisher…) of fics ever ;-; raaaaah
I put “Korean baby names” in Google. If Google lied to me, it’s not my fault ;~;
I CRY.
This entry was originally posted at http://rabenhorst.dreamwidth.org/91921.html. You can also comment there using OpenID!
Author: fonulyn
Rating: PG13
Warnings: MPREG
Pairing: Kyuhyun/Zhou Mi, Han Geng/Heechul, Sungmin
Disclaimer: I own no one, only my dirty imagination.
Summary: They didn’t think it could happen twice. They were wrong.
Comments: The long awaited sequel to Why Louis Vuitton Should Make Maternity Pants and a part of the mpreg!verse. I know I wrote the first part like… a year ago and clearly, I suck :( but I hope you like this anyway. Basically it’s almost as fluffy and nauseatingly sweet as the first part! \o/ Except now the role of the mommy changes.
This is dedicated to nashirah since without her insistent but endlessly patient nagging and reminding it would have never been finished. Ilubb ;~;♥ Also daidetre’s existence was vital for this to happen.
It isn’t like Kyuhyun thought raising children would be easy, but this is proving to be even more than he was prepared for.
First of all, he thinks, a few lousy months to prepare for it is so not enough. The first couple of months of pregnancy go by in such a haze, he doesn’t even really count them. Sometimes he wishes they wrote a manual for all this, so he could just go there and see what to do. Like, what is he supposed to do when his four-year-old daughter comes to him, beaming proudly because she spilled juice on the floor but cleaned it up herself. …wiping up the mess with her father’s new, expensive silk shirt. He can’t be mad at her then, now can he?
With Cheolhyun and Minhee, everything proves to be a challenge. They are happy kids, but along with the happiness comes such an amount of sheer energy that neither Kyuhyun nor Zhou Mi knows where it all originates from. They certainly have never been that hyperactive, at least not that either of them admits it.
Already when she was born, Minhee looked so much like Zhou Mi that everyone assumed she’d grow to be exactly like him. As a stubborn four-year-old she proves to be more like Kyuhyun, though. She loves games, everything from simple four-piece jigsaw puzzles to watching her father blow up spaceships. She could spend endless amounts of time just observing everyone around her, watching from big, clear eyes.
Meanwhile, Cheolhyun looks a lot like Kyuhyun but couldn’t be further from him personality-wise. The little boy loves going through the closet and pulls down all the clothes from the hangers, only to wrap himself in the nicest fabrics he finds. He loves getting dressed in the mornings since Zhou Mi lets him pick if he wants to wear his dark blue pants or his green-red striped pants. He has also already lectured Kyuhyun about his style, with all the determination and conviction of his four year old life.
Heechul says it’s almost scary. It’s like watching a mini-Kyuhyun and mini-Zhou Mi with switched personalities and he thinks it disturbs the balance of the world. He also loves teaching the children little pranks when no one else is watching, feigning innocence right afterwards. When someone asks he loudly exclaims how much he hates children and how they’re so inconvenient, but whenever a babysitter is needed he is the first one they call. He never says no.
“Cheolhyun get back here!” Kyuhyun raises his voice, not caring that pretty much every customer in the supermarket is looking at him by then. Or if not at him, then at his son, who is currently laughing and screeching as he runs along the corridor as fast as he can. The only reason Kyuhyun isn’t running after him is that he is not quite sure how well he could run with a squirming four-year-old girl in his arms without crashing them both into a shelf. Minhee would much rather run with her brother, but Kyuhyun doesn’t really feel like chasing two kids. One is plenty enough. Add a barking dog on a leash to the equation and Kyuhyun is pretty much screwed.
“Now get back here, or else - !” Unfortunately the ultimatum goes by unnoticed, if anything it makes the child speed up before he slips behind the stack of oranges. Great, Kyuhyun curses inwardly. Now it will take ages to get the boy give up on the hide and seek. “C’mon. Dad won’t be angry if you now come here and behave like a nice boy should,” Kyuhyun tries in the most patient fatherly voice he can manage. He doesn’t do very well.
Minhee giggles. “Daddy already is angry!” She announces, her smile so bright it seems to be enough to split her face in half. She squirms just a little and Kyuhyun adjusts her, shifting her better on his hip. The dog tries to use the moment to dash under a shelf but a gentle tug on the leash stops it. “No,” he denies, “daddy is just …frustrated. It’s dinnertime soon!” He explains to the little girl, who looks at him with all the worldly wisdom in her eyes. She pulls a little on the adorable pigtail Zhou Mi tied of her hair in the morning, managing to make it a little askew and Kyuhyun curses the way it makes his heart melt a little. He is never going to win with these kids.
“Alright,” he sighs in deep, circling around the vegetable stand until he spots the blue of Cheolhyun’s sweater. “Dad will get you ice cream.” He knows Zhou Mi won’t be happy about that, after all they agreed on no sweets before dinner, but he sees no other valid plan to salvage the situation. If only life was as easy as a video game. Thus far he’s found no logic in children though, and he can’t just pause them when he needs a break.
The mention of ice cream works though. Cheolhyun is beaming as he pads around the veggies and runs back to his father, hugging his leg as tight as he can. “Swawbewwy!” He demands and Kyuhyun grabs his little hand as a reassurance that he won’t be running away again. “Strawberry,” he agrees.
After he promises that the twins can both ride in the shopping cart he gets them to calm down, even if he bypasses half of the items on the list. Who needs fabric softener anyway, they can very well do without it if it means he gets to live a little longer. As he grabs the children their ice creams he makes sure to pick himself an extra large one.
Next time, he thinks, he should put the twins on a leash. The dog can run free.
“Mommy, mommy!” Minhee screams as soon as the door opens, dashing off to find the person in question. With endless patience Zhou Mi has tried to make the twins call them both dad, or any variation of that, but Kyuhyun already made sure they would always refer to Zhou Mi as mommy. He likes it that way. With time, Zhou Mi adapts to it too, instead of always frowning when he is addressed.
The happiness on her features is indescribable when Zhou Mi rounds the corner and crouches down to her level, a bright smile on his face. “Oh hey big girl! Did you have fun shopping with dad?” He laughs as he wraps his arms around the girl and spins her around, her laughter joining his in mere seconds. “Yes!” Minhee nearly yells, in the midst of sunny giggles. “Daddy got us ice cream!” She beams, and only now Zhou Mi notices the chocolate stains on her round cheeks. He shoots Kyuhyun a look but only gets an innocent smile in turn.
“Is the dinner ready?” Kyuhyun asks nonchalantly, this time balancing Cheolhyun on his hip as the boy got tired of walking approximately two steps after they exited the store. That was to be expected, with all that running indoors. Kyuhyun reaches to plant a loud kiss on Zhou Mi’s cheek, which leads to Minhee loudly demanding a kiss as well. Of course Cheolhyun doesn’t want to be left out and thus he gets one too. Kyuhyun doesn’t remember ever being even half this snuggly in his whole life.
Thankfully, that seems to serve as distraction and Zhou Mi is smiling again, leaning down to let Minhee down on her own two feet again. “Yes, dinner is ready. Just go wash your hands - and your faces.” He grabs Cheolhyun to lift him off Kyuhyun’s arms and on the floor as well, and the twins dash off happily towards the bathroom. “I hope you’re hungry,” Zhou Mi smiles at Kyuhyun.
Kyuhyun groans. “I hope you’re not. One of us has to make sure the food stays where it’s supposed to.” He can’t help but grin, though, especially when Zhou Mi steps closer and wraps his arms loosely around his neck. “I’m not hungry. Not for food…” He drawls, and for a split second they look straight at each other.
Until they burst out laughing. “That was awful, Zhou Mi,” Kyuhyun snickers, his eyes sparkling with sheer amusement. “You’ve been living with me for too long,” he says. Zhou Mi agrees.
They don’t get any further with that since suddenly there is loud screeching and yelling and barking and it sounds like a small natural disaster suddenly emerged in their bathroom. They both get a mild panic attack as they run to help, only to see that their medicine cabinet is no longer hanging on the wall but rather strewn all across the floor. Dinner has to wait a while.
It is the first day of day care for the children when Kyuhyun wakes up feeling like his guts want to climb out through his mouth. He doesn’t remember ever feeling this nauseous before and he spends a good moment in bed just counting the colourful postcards glued to the opposite wall, unmoving. He can hear the sounds in the kitchen; Zhou Mi is obviously preparing breakfast and judging by the yapping sounds their dog is trying to be as much of a bother as possible. Cheolhyun and Minhee are laughing and screeching, and the high pitched sounds of it make Kyuhyun close his eyes and wish he could teleport them away with magical powers.
He is still in bed ten minutes later when Zhou Mi appears in the doorframe, smiling at the bundle of blankets in the middle of the mattress. “C’mon Kyuhyun, I made pancakes. You still have time to eat before work if you get up now!” He chirps, unbearably happy at such an early moment in the morning. Zhou Mi practically waltzes to the window, opening it for some fresh air. “It was raining during the night so I packed the kids raincoats and I think they’ll wear rubber boots today,” he babbles on, approaching the bed now to perch on the edge.
The only answer Kyuhyun manages is an unintelligible garble. It’s not like he is usually pure sunshine in the mornings but this is weird even for him, and Zhou Mi frowns slightly. “Are you feeling well?” He reaches out to touch Kyuhyun’s forehead. “You don’t feel hot, though.” He muses out loud, gently rubbing soothing circles on Kyuhyun’s arm.
As a thank you, Kyuhyun promptly throws up on his lap.
The rest of the morning turns out hectic since Zhou Mi now has to shower, change clothes and get himself presentable before work, in addition to changing the sheets and feeding the children and making sure Kyuhyun is alright where he is crouched in front of the toilet bowl, retching his guts out. By the time he gets the kids dressed in their bright raincoats and rubber boots, he hasn’t had a second to even consider eating breakfast, and he throws a longing glance towards the leftover pancakes. He packs them into the fridge though, piling the unwashed dishes on the side of the sink.
“Are you sure you’ll be fine?” Zhou Mi asks as he pokes his head into the bathroom, frowning worriedly. “I called your boss and he said he’ll deal with things. You just need to go see a doctor when you’re feeling like you can. Ask him to write you sick for the rest of the week.” He babbles on and on, a typical sign that he is feeling restless. This isn’t the first morning Kyuhyun has been feeling nauseous, even if it’s the first time he’s quite this sick.
Kyuhyun waves it off, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. “I’ll live. Get the kids to day care.” He doesn’t even have the needed energy to go say bye to the twins, leaning weakly against the toilet seat. This is so unfair. It’s getting a bit too much to blame the sickness on food poisoning now that it’s been happening for longer, especially since no one else in the family is sick.
If there is one thing Kyuhyun hates, passionately, it’s doctors. Not them personally, no, but what they stand for and everything that has to do with them, from the clinic surroundings to hushed voices and faked sympathy. He knows he’s being unfair. Yet he can’t help it.
Still, he knows Zhou Mi will have his head if he doesn’t get checked up. And what’s left of him, his boss will grind and throw off a cliff. So, when the throwing up eases, he picks up his cell phone.
They all forget about that for a few days. Kyuhyun gets written sick and his doctor runs some tests, telling him he’ll get the results on the following Friday. It’s consequently the same Friday when the twins are having a sleep over with Kyuhyun’s parents. The grandparents are very insistent on spending as much time with the children as possible. Not that Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi mind, a day a week is mostly welcome rest.
After work, Zhou Mi gets the twins from day care and brings them to his parents, lured in by the mention of tea and cake, and he only manages to leave a couple of hours later. Finally he comes home to a pale, frozen Kyuhyun sitting on the couch. He looks like he has seen a ghost and Zhou Mi can’t help but to feel vaguely concerned. Swiftly he moves over, taking a seat right next to the other man, and rests his palm between his shoulder blades. “Was it something serious?” He looks straight at Kyuhyun from clear, worried eyes. He remembers very well that today was the day for the test results.
“No.” Kyuhyun shakes his head. He looks kind of desperate though, his eyes wide as he turns towards the other man. “Yes.” He nods, then harrumphs impatiently. “Kind of.” He obviously doesn’t really know what to say or what to do, sighing as he rubs his temples and runs his fingers through the mess of his hair.
Zhou Mi arches an eyebrow. “Kind of..?” Inwardly he is going through all the possible scenarios, his mind frantically trying to find an explanation. It can’t be anything too severe, now can it? There would have been other symptoms than throwing up and feeling nauseous, and if it’s a stomach flu then it could very well be taken care of and -
“Shouldn’t you know,” Kyuhyun snaps, interrupting his thought process. He pouts and it makes him look very young and very stubborn, defiance clear in his voice as he goes on. “You already went through this. Even if you didn’t have these horrible, horrible morning sicknesses. What did I ever do to deserve this?”
“What are you talking about, morning sickness? Wasn’t it a stomach flu or-” Zhou mi begins but then suddenly something snaps in his mind, something clicks just right and the realization dawns on him. “Oh. Oh.” His eyes widen. “You’re pregnant!?”
Kyuhyun’s answer is a deep sigh. “No shit, Sherlock.”
Turns out Zhou Mi is rather excited about the news. A part of him is delighted since now Kyuhyun will have to go through all the hardships he faced a bit over four years ago, everything from backaches to water in the legs and horrible mood swings. A part of him is content since at least Kyuhyun has no good excuse to make the new baby call him mommy. A part of him is just happy since now the twins will get a new friend to play with, amongst other things. He’s always loved children and having three of his own… well it’s three more than he ever thought they would get.
Turns out Kyuhyun is rather whiny now that he knows what’s going on. He acts like it’s the end of the world, making a huge number out of the fact he needs to go puke at least three times every morning. At first it works and he can blackmail Zhou Mi into doing everything for him, from reading the morning papers out loud to bringing him snacks and drinks every other second. That only lasts for so long. After a couple of weeks, Zhou Mi already skilfully ignores Kyuhyun’s complaints and lets him whine in peace. He still does Kyuhyun’s part of the chores though, practically holding up the whole household alone.
They wait until it’s been two months after the initial doctor’s check up. By then, Kyuhyun is so restless he feels like he absolutely needs to talk to someone about it. He has a strong feeling of déjà vu when he picks up his phone and calls his best friend. Sungmin picks up after three rings and it’s already quite reassuring to listen to him chatter on and on about what’s up. Sungmin asks a lot about the twins too, and Kyuhyun ends up describing their latest adventures quite animatedly.
Finally there’s a pause in conversation and Kyuhyun think this is it. This is now the good moment to spill his guts to his friend and get some much needed guidance. He clears his throat and even though he can’t see Sungmin he knows he’s listening attentively. “We… we’re having a baby again.” He ventures forward, thinking it’d be the best to get it out straight.
There’s silence for a second, then. “You knocked Mimi up again?” Sungmin sounds more amused than anything else. Except maybe surprised since honestly, the first pregnancy was already unexpected. The odds of a man getting pregnant are quite damn low, and for the same person to get pregnant twice? Statistical impossibility, pretty much. Then again so are two-headed calves and those are born too.
This is the hardest part. Kyuhyun steels himself. “Well, no. It’s me.”
The next fifteen minutes straight, Sungmin laughs.
Heechul’s reaction is similar. Three days later he and Han Geng come over to visit. It’s somewhat of a regular occurrence after the twins were born. Heechul calls it becoming old, and complains lengthily about how they’re now these old married couples sipping tea and eating biscuits. He doesn’t care that someone always points out they’re barely in their thirties, he simply waves it off and goes on with his rant. Heechul has always been selective with the reality he accepts.
Right now, he is staring at Kyuhyun over a cup of tea, his mouth hanging slightly open as he scans his appearance. Kyuhyun knows one can’t see the pregnancy yet, but he still feels self-conscious as Heechul’s gaze lingers around his waist as if to see if he’s rounded already. “You’ve got to be fucking kidding me!” The words come bursting out and Heechul barely manages to set his cup down on the table. And that pretty much sums it all up.
Except of course Minhee has to be right there, right next to Heechul. She reaches up to tug on his sleeve. “Auntie Heehee,” she begins. The nickname makes Heechul shoot a poisonous glare towards Kyuhyun, who feigns innocence as usual. Minhee doesn’t pay any attention to that, still holding Heechul’s sleeve as she looks up at him from curious eyes. “What does ‘fucking’ mean?”
Heechul looks surprised first, then even moderately embarrassed, only to open his mouth to explain it. They all know he would probably give the actual explanation, but Zhou Mi decides his four-year-old daughter doesn’t need to yet know the mechanics of human reproduction. “It’s a very bad word and Heechul is going to apologize for using it,” Zhou Mi looks pointedly at Heechul who rolls his eyes but mumbles a sort of apology under his breath.
That seems to be enough for Minhee and she smiles, using the moment to climb up to sit on Heechul’s lap instead. Heechul doesn’t even say anything, instead wraps an arm around her and reaches for a chocolate chip cookie to hand over to the little girl. The scene is kind of heart-warming and for a second, Han Geng catches himself thinking it would be quite nice to have a little one in their family too. Then he thinks it over, imagining the dragon Heechul would be when pregnant, and thanks all the gods he can think of that he’s been spared of that.
“So, Heechul,” Zhou Mi begins after a second, his eyes shining happily as he looks at his friend, the smile on his lips so wide it’s nearly impossible. “We should go shopping for baby clothes!” He exclaims and instantly Heechul’s expression brightens and he agrees.
They seem to get a little addition to their shopping trip though, since the next second Cheolhyun speaks up in a determined voice. “I want to shop, too!”
Zhou Mi smiles affectionately at his fashionable little boy, ruffling his hair. “Of course you get to shop too.”
Kyuhyun frowns, though. “But we still have all the baby clothes from Cheolhyun and Minhee. It means we have both girl-clothes and boy-clothes, so we’re fully prepared! I didn’t pack the clothes into boxes so they’d just be lying around taking up space…”
“Aw don’t get so whiny,” Zhou Mi smiles as he leans in to plant a kiss on his cheek. “Those are so last decade! They’ve been out of fashion for years!” They all know that Kyuhyun will grumble and sigh and try to convince Zhou Mi it’s not necessary to spend another fortune on clothes, and in the end just give in since that’s what he always does.
A while later Han Geng takes the dog out with the children, assuring that it’s alright and that he can handle all three. He’s remarkably good with children and the dog knows him more than well, so they simply wish him a good time. The other adults move over to the living room, Heechul claiming the comfortable plush armchair as his own while Kyuhyun and Zhou Mi share the couch.
“You know,” Heechul shakes his head. “I still can’t believe this is happening. How the fuck can you be pregnant!?” He directs the disbelieving look at Kyuhyun, who automatically presses his palm on his stomach as if Heechul’s gaze is automatically radioactive and he needs to shield the life inside of him. Heechul doesn’t mind. “Shouldn’t it be like a… statistical impossibility?”
“It must be my super-sperm!” Zhou Mi sounds happy about it, his voice chirpy as he pulls Kyuhyun closer by an arm around his shoulders.
Kyuhyun sputters. “Hey, I knocked you up first!” He points out. No one listens.
“It must be,” Heechul agrees, leaning back in his chair with a long suffering sigh. “Well. Good luck with this. You’re going to need it.”
When Kyuhyun begins to show, it somehow makes everything more real for them. It’s like it’s the last sign to show they’re not dreaming, but it’s very much happening. It also triggers a change in Zhou Mi, much to Kyuhyun’s dismay.
That is why Kyuhyun finds himself in the midst of yet another phone-call to Sungmin. “He won’t let me do anything!” Kyuhyun tries to show the extent of his desperation in his voice. “And by anything, I mean anything! He thinks it might harm me somehow.”
Sungmin is eating something, crackers or chips judging by the crunching sounds every time it’s Kyuhyun’s turn to speak. Somehow it makes Kyuhyun feel like he’s just cheap entertainment for his friend, something like a fun show to watch with a bowl of popcorn. “Why does it bother you so much?” Sungmin asks finally, and one can nearly hear him shrugging. Figuratively speaking of course. “You get to laze around all day and do absolutely nothing.”
“Well, no,” Kyuhyun denies, a little bit annoyed. “I still go to work you know. It’s not like I’m breaking apart! I’m pregnant, not dying. But he seems to think it’s somehow…” He doesn’t know what to say, so he settles for making a frustrated noise, something between a harrumph and a growl.
“So he doesn’t let you …watch TV?” Sungmin asks to clarify.
Kyuhyun grumbles. “He does.”
“Game?”
“Yes.”
“Walk? Hold the kids? Wash the dishes?”
“Yes, yes and yes.”
Sungmin rattles off a few more suggestions and after receiving the same answer to everything he groans loudly. “C’mon, Kyuhyun, spit it out. What is the problem?”
“Sex, alright!” Kyuhyun cries. “Almost every time I try to touch him more… suggestively he smiles and kisses me and guides my hands away. Or tells me he’ll get some ice cream and comes back with a sappy movie. Or gets the twins! That’s a blow below the belt, seriously. He is depriving me!”
“Kyuhyun, I am not sure if I want to hear more,” Sungmin warns him, cutting off the exasperated monologue.
“Sorry,” Kyuhyun apologizes but goes on the next second. “I just feel like I’m going to explode soon. Or spend my coffee breaks at work jerking off.” He knows he is being slightly unreasonable. It’s not like Zhou Mi put him on celibacy and doesn’t give him any, it’s just that… well, he would want more. Lots more. Lots and lots more.
Sungmin makes an agreeing noise, obviously thinking of something. “Did you have sex while he was expecting the twins?”
“Yes,” Kyuhyun answers with a curt nod he doesn’t realize goes unseen.
“Then remind him of that,” Sungmin prods gently. “Tell him it’s no different now and you want him. He’s not going to kick you out of bed for suggesting it.”
Kyuhyun grumbles. “I guess so.” Actually, it doesn’t sound like a bad idea at all, and by this point he is ready to try pretty much anything. Usually Sungmin’s advice is worth taking, even if he might not admit it out loud. He still spends good fifteen minutes complaining to his friend how he is getting more and more frustrated, until Sungmin cuts him off and tells him to grow some balls and do something about it.
When Zhou Mi comes home with the children and their fluffy dog, Kyuhyun has already spread snacks and a board game right there on the living room floor. He cut apples and bananas, peeled mandarins and found fresh juice, trying to come up with a child-friendly buffet instead of having his family snack on crisps and candy all the time. He was feeling a lot calmer after his talk with Sungmin and was in a good enough mood to even hum to himself as he waited, flipping through a magazine.
As soon as he hears the door open there’s also enthusiastic barking and yipping, and in mere seconds a small ball of fur launches itself right at him. He laughs as he grabs the dog, ruffling the curly fur in a way that makes their pet even more enthusiastic to be back home. Somewhere near the door the voices of children are loud and clear, Zhou Mi’s rising above them to sternly tell them they should take their shoes off before dashing off to find daddy.
Soon enough Kyuhyun has two enthusiastic toddlers in his arms, both trying to tell him about the trip to the park at the same time so he has no idea who to listen to. Most of the explanation goes past without him grasping any of it, but he has to smile as he watches the rosy cheeks and the sparkling eyes, the enthusiastic hand gestures that get wilder the further the explanations get. “We got to play in the swings!” one of the twins exclaims only for the other to go on with “Mommy built us a sandcastle!” and it’s all underlined by the yips and bounces of the dog.
It’s chaos. But it’s the kind of chaos Kyuhyun never wants to live without. Somewhere in the midst of it all Zhou Mi leans in and steals a short kiss from him. It makes Kyuhyun smile, even though Zhou Mi’s nose is cold as it brushes against his cheek, and he reaches to tug on the man’s sleeve to make him sit down as well. “Snakes and ladders!” Minhee announces as soon as she realizes there’s the game in front of them, scrambling to get the red piece before anyone else. Cheolhyun is classier than that, picking the blue one for it matches his new sweater.
“Daddy is pink!” Minhee decides and drops the pink piece into Kyuhyun’s palm, looking expectantly at her brother to decide which one Zhou Mi would get. After a brief consideration Cheolhyun settles for the yellow one, handing it to their father with a bright smile. “It’s sunshine colour!” He explains happily. Kyuhyun decides that nothing else could be more fitting.
Kyuhyun has to fight down the competitive streak to accidentally lose the game when it already looks like he will win. Zhou Mi has never been good at games that require luck anyway, always joking that it just means his luck in love has to multiply to compensate. Followed by pointed looks at Kyuhyun, who sputters and exclaims he is worth plenty stupid board games, before kissing the grin off Zhou Mi’s lips.
They play three rounds before the twins get tired of it and afterwards spend the remainder of the afternoon eating the fruit buffet Kyuhyun had prepared, laughing and making funny noises together. When it’s bedtime for the kids Cheolhyun promptly refuses to brush his teeth before he is promised he gets to sit on Kyuhyun’s shoulders while brushing them. That, of course, means that Zhou Mi has to hoist Minhee up on his shoulders and their twins end up giggling and trying to push at one another while they’re standing in the small bathroom.
Finally, after what feels like a small eternity, the twins are in their beds, tucked under their blankets and fast asleep. Zhou Mi and Kyuhyun relocate on the couch, snuggling into the plush cushions and each other. “I am never ever going to read the three little piggies again,” Zhou Mi whines into Kyuhyun’s shoulder. “Never. I read it four times today! Four times!” He hisses, rubbing his nose into the other man’s shirt theatrically.
“Yesterday I read it five times,” Kyuhyun points out with a low chuckle that seems to rumble from somewhere deep in his chest, while he tangles his fingers into Zhou Mi’s silky smooth hair. “Which, I know, doesn’t break your record. What was it? Eleven times in one day?” They had never understood what had made the twins love that particular story so much, but they demanded it again and again and again until their parents were completely fed up with it and begun to form their own variations of the story.
“You know what,” Zhou Mi asks but doesn’t wait for an answer before going on, “when they turn eighteen I’m going to burn that book, I swear. Unless,” he thinks of something, sliding his large palm down Kyuhyun’s front to the round of his stomach. “Unless the newcomer likes it too. I guess we need to keep it then. For a while.”
The empty threat makes Kyuhyun smirk, but there is something that distracts him quite effectively. The touch is warm even through the thin fabric of his shirt and he shifts a little as Zhou Mi begins to rub gently, as if he is saying hello to the growing life inside of Kyuhyun’s body. It doesn’t leave Kyuhyun unaffected either, though, and he shifts until he can lift his leg a little and press Zhou Mi between his thighs.
At first Zhou Mi doesn’t seem to get it, not before Kyuhyun cants his hips a little and it makes their bodies rub together. “Kuixian?” He murmurs as he lifts his head a bit, tilts it to look up at the younger man from curiously sparkling eyes. It’s not like he doesn’t know what Kyuhyun is up to, he rather seems to be asking him why again, amusement clear in his expression.
“C’mon, the kids are asleep, it’s just the two of us…” Kyuhyun tries, and although he knows his voice always does things to Zhou Mi when he drops it to such low, sultry range, he practically holds his breath as he waits for a response.
The first reaction he gets is a chuckle. The second is a soft kiss. The third is an amused question. “How come you’re so horny all the time?” It doesn’t seem that Zhou Mi would be against the suggestion though, not judging by the way he is still moving his fingers slowly, drawing circles on Kyuhyun’s stomach through his clothes, lower and lower.
“I don’t know,” Kyuhyun whines. “Does it matter?” He is thankful that their couch is extra-wide when he shifts, practically pinning the other man between his body and the backrest of the couch. “I want you,” he purrs, ghosting his lips over the other man’s jaw. “Can’t we just enjoy it now before my belly will be the size of a beach ball and it gets in the way all the time?”
Zhou Mi doesn’t say anything at first, only captures his mouth in a wet, hot kiss. That’s all the encouragement Kyuhyun needs and he pushes one leg between Zhou Mi’s, shamelessly rubbing against him. Already the kissing and groping is enough to make Kyuhyun purr like a content cat, everything in his world aligning just right for once.
By the time he manages to work Zhou Mi’s pants open and push his hand inside, he is happily focused on the making out and shuts the rest of the world out. How could he not, with the way the other man is moving, making those low, sinful sounds in the back of his throat. “C’mon, help me,” Kyuhyun urges as he pulls back from a kiss, flashing what he hopes passes as a cocky smirk. “I need to get out of these pants and into you.”
At that, Zhou Mi grins. “Wouldn’t it be kind of freaky if we were both pregnant at the same time?” He tugs on Kyuhyun’s pants, twisting his fingers in a way that is completely, truly unfair. It’s not like he can catch a clear thought when he’s being touched like that.
Finally the meaning of the words sinks in. Kyuhyun groans. “It’s a statistical impossibility! Do you want me to do the math and present you the odds?” They both know he could, just to show he’s right. He doesn’t even wait for a response as he slips his long fingers underneath Zhou Mi’s shirt, marvelling in the feeling of the smooth skin beneath his touch.
Until Zhou Mi brings him back down to earth. “It’s statistically impossible for you to be pregnant, too.” He speaks with a devilish grin, and Kyuhyun could swear he enjoys seeing the baffled look on his face. And people say he is mean…
Kyuhyun sighs. “…second thoughts. You fuck me.” He rolls over with a low grumble, hooking his legs around the other man’s waist as he pulls him in for a kiss.
Some things never change. One of those things is Kyuhyun and his addiction to games. Addiction is at least what Zhou Mi calls it, half jokingly, as he tries to prod the other man into something more productive or social. Kyuhyun tells him it’s social enough: he is talking to Heechul while gaming, now isn’t he? Heechul counts as being social. “You’re just envious Heechul spends time online and isn’t out shopping with you,” he retorts, pushing at Zhou Mi with his toes. The taller man gives him a theatrical look, shaking his head slowly as he returns to his book. He isn’t even trying to hide the small grin though.
This is how they end up often when the children are napping: both sitting on the couch, Kyuhyun sideways with his computer propped up on his lap and his toes dug underneath Zhou Mi’s thigh. Zhou Mi might watch TV or entertain himself reading, and most often they don’t even talk. They simply enjoy the silent companionship. Until Kyuhyun ends up kicking Zhou Mi playfully to make him get some snacks, or until Zhou Mi decides it’s time to stop gaming and starts tickling Kyuhyun mercilessly.
Right now Kyuhyun is focused on the game, trying to beat Heechul for once. He used to win every time, but somehow recently he has been more than distracted. He blames Zhou Mi for knowing exactly how to grab his attention, and two little kids with endless energy and enthusiasm. Heechul tells him he’s making excuses. “I am not,” Kyuhyun frowns, setting out to destroy Heechul’s good mood with a surprise attack. It’s a new release, neither of them have been playing it for long yet.
“Oh yes you are,” Heechul’s voice sounds through the headset, cackling at him as he obviously forgot to watch his back. “And you are so losing, too.” He points out victoriously and despite his grumbles, Kyuhyun can’t really disagree. They keep on arguing absent-mindedly, their focus more on the actual game than the insults they mumble at one another.
For a while, Zhou Mi listens to Kyuhyun’s side of the discussion, amused. Sometimes he drops in a remark as well, gaining either disapproving looks from Kyuhyun or loud protests from Heechul. Finally Kyuhyun kicks him not-too-gently, informing him that it’s his duty to get his pregnant husband something to eat. Zhou Mi laughs, but obediently gets up and pads into the kitchen.
“You know, Kyuhyun,” Heechul speaks up after a while, sounding almost distracted. He probably is, judging by the way he blows up an entire battalion of Kyuhyun’s troops. “I’m surprised he hasn’t restricted your computer access yet.”
At first, Kyuhyun is too distracted cursing and swearing, and only when he manages to salvage at least something his mind catches up with him. “What? Why?” He demands, not appreciating it when people joke about his precious gaming time.
“Didn’t you hear?” Heechul asks and although he aims for a surprised tone, Kyuhyun knows he’s gloating. He so is. “Apparently there have been researches that the computer sends some …whatever, some radiation or waves or something. It’s not good for pregnant women.”
Kyuhyun refrains from pointing out that he is not a woman, since he isn’t too stupid to realize the pregnancy is the keyword here. “Does it mean..?” He asks slowly. Heechul cuts him off. “Yes it does. Bye bye games!”
“Listen, Heechul! If you will tell Zhou Mi I will personally castrate you and I promise it won’t be pret-”
“Tell me what?” Zhou Mi appears, of course, at the most inconvenient moment, frowning questioningly at Kyuhyun. Heechul laughs out loud, while Kyuhyun inwardly cries at the way his life is obviously going to suck from now on.
Kyuhyun still tries to explain it away but Heechul isn’t exactly helpful. And Zhou Mi isn’t stupid, either. In the end his computer ends up confiscated, locked in the top drawer of their dressed. Zhou Mi slides the key into his pocket and promises he still gets computer access. Sometimes.
The promise of some gaming every once in a while keeps Kyuhyun happy for only so long, before he realizes that he’s had to cut down on it so much he feels utterly deprived. He heaves a sigh, wondering when his life turned out like this, always something to crave he can’t have.
He is a good boy, though. For a few weeks. Then he begins to take out his frustrations on being even more demanding and clingy than he’s been up until then. Zhou Mi doesn’t seem to mind, sadly, so it’s time for more drastic measures.
That’s when Kyuhyun decides he can use the hours he’s home alone more effectively. He takes a few days to figure out where exactly Zhou Mi has hidden his laptop, but after that it’s all smooth sailing. Free, unlimited gaming, for several hours a day! It can’t really be dangerous, now can it? That’s surely just propaganda.
The first time Kyuhyun bumps into Heechul online is kind of an accident. Of course he knows Heechul plays on the same servers but he didn’t expect the other man to be there at this time of the day. Turns out, Heechul is skipping work and threatens Kyuhyun’s life if he tells someone. Kyuhyun instantly takes the opportunity to make a deal: he won’t tell anyone if Heechul doesn’t tell Zhou Mi he’s gaming again.
Their agreement lasts for a while, before Heechul gets bored of it. “I really think you should tell Seasoning about this. You’re kind of going behind his back.”
“You make it sound like I’m cheating on him,” Kyuhyun snorts.
“Well,” Heechul says, “in a way you do cheat him.”
There’s a brief pang of guilt in Kyuhyun’s gut but he pushes it off and harrumphs at his friend. “Shut up. What he doesn’t know, can’t hurt him! Now are we going to play or are we going to sit here blathering nonsense until my time is up?” He doesn’t receive more than a short agreeing sound, which instantly makes him grin. “Good, so now w-”
“Kyuhyun.”
Kyuhyun swallows hard. That isn’t Heechul’s voice and it doesn’t come from the headphones. It’s another, very familiar voice, and it comes from right behind him. He also knows he never gets called by his birth name in that tone unless he’s in trouble. Big trouble. Slowly, he reaches out to pause the game… second thoughts, he aborts the game altogether and clicks the laptop shut.
When he turns around, he tries the sweetest, most innocent smile he can manage. “Zhou Mi, I can explain…”
Kyuhyun kind of feels like a child when he receives the scolding of his life and is sent to bed without dinner. Not that Zhou Mi could stay mad at him for long, though, since in the evening he appears with a bowl of soup and a sandwich, even if he gives Kyuhyun a stern glare and tells him not to get up from bed.
In the morning they work out a compromise.
“Daddy, are you sure you want to eat that?” Cheolhyun asks his father, rather worriedly, as Kyuhyun is just about to shovel a generous spoonful of cake into his mouth. Kyuhyun frowns a little, setting the spoon back on the plate. That kind of was a slight hit to his appetite.
“What do you mean?” He asks.
Cheolhyun tries to jump on the couch but his legs are a little too stubby still, and in the end he has to use his hands as well to drag himself on the cushions. It’s painstakingly slow, but finally he’s sitting next to Kyuhyun, looking at him from clear eyes. “The auntie in day care says eating too much is bad,” he explains. “You’ve eaten much!”
Kyuhyun doesn’t even have the time to protest or ask for anything more, before Cheolhyun leans in and pokes his belly with his short index finger. “Look!”
Right then, Kyuhyun doesn’t have any idea whether he should laugh or just sputter indignantly. Zhou Mi, however, doesn’t have such qualms as he cracks up, laughing so hard he has to clutch his stomach helplessly. “Oh Kuixian,” he gasps through the giggles. “Our son has a point!”
Kyuhyun frowns. “I’m eating for two!” he protests.
That catches Minhee’s curiosity and she bounds over, her toys forgotten as she instead grabs Kyuhyun’s knee to signal he wants to be lifted on his lap. “Why is daddy eating for two?” she asks. “What does it mean? Can I eat for two, too? I want to eat for three!”
“Oh sweetie,” Zhou Mi smiles as he’s finally collected himself. He grabs Minhee under her armpits and lifts her up to sit on Kyuhyun’s knee, before patting her head softly. “You can’t eat for two, not like daddy does.”
“But I want to!” Minhee insists, a slight frown on her features. Cheolhyun looks like he agrees, even if he doesn’t say anything.
“Uhm.” Kyuhyun has no idea how he is going to tell the children they’re going to have a sibling. How do parents handle these things? “The thing is. There’s. You know. A baby?” Very eloquent. He’s almost proud of himself.
Zhou Mi chuckles as he sits on the couch as well. “Daddy means that you’re going to have a little sister or brother! But first, the baby needs to grow in daddy’s tummy.”
The twins look quite suspicious, as if they’re considering whether such a thing is possible or not. “Were we in daddy’s tummy too?” Cheolhyun asks finally, after a long pause.
“No,” Zhou Mi smiles. “You were in mine.”
“Both of us?” Minhee asks.
“Yes, both of you.”
The twins take a second to consider that, looking at one another. They seem to settle for the answer though, giving simultaneous nods. Minhee reaches out to pat Kyuhyun’s stomach, whispering something along the lines of I’ll wait for you little sister.
Cheolhyun, instead, turns to Zhou Mi. “Were you that huge too?”
“You know, Mi,” Kyuhyun muses out loud. He’s lying in bed right next to the other man, arm draped over his chest as he snuggles closer. Zhou Mi is focusing on a book he’s reading, but Kyuhyun is trying hard to come up with a way to get his attention back at him. Without flat out pushing his hand in his pants, that is. He is practicing his subtle. “Even your ears are pretty.”
“My what?” Zhou Mi turns his head and Kyuhyun can’t see the aforementioned bodypart any longer.
Kyuhyun makes a dissatisfied little grunt and tucks his nose between Zhou Mi’s head and the pillow, in the perfect gap left there just for him. “Your ear.” He mumbles silently, defiantly, and the next moment is teasingly breathing hot air against the sensitive spot beneath the other man’s ear.
“You’re horny again.” Zhou Mi concludes flatly. He doesn’t even look away from his book, but instead flips on the next page.
“And we have the perfect opportunity for some quality time together,” Kyuhyun purrs, shamelessly sliding his palm underneath Zhou Mi’s shirt to trace patterns on warm skin. Maybe it’s soon time for sticking his hand in his pants, subtle or not, he’s been controlling himself long enough.
Zhou Mi laughs. “But the kids,” he tries, lamely, and there is really no strength behind the words.
“Are asleep,” Kyuhyun fills in, placing a line of kisses on Zhou Mi’s jaw. He gets a low sigh of oh fine and Zhou Mi reaches to put his book away on the nightstand, so he can direct his attention where it rightfully belongs: to Kyuhyun.
In a while they’re so focused on one another that they barely register the first screech that cuts through the air. Zhou Mi only grunts and shifts a bit closer, pushing his leg between Kyuhyun’s, in an attempt to slot himself near without being too rough. There is a second cry though, followed by a third, and suddenly they land back to reality simultaneously.
Kyuhyun sighs and Zhou Mi smiles at him apologetically, as if it was his fault the children decided to interrupt. “Were asleep,” he sighs.
“Fuck,” Kyuhyun grunts, but nevertheless pushes himself off the mattress to go see what’s wrong.
Wherein Zhou Mi had to be forced into bedrest, Kyuhyun is the exact opposite. Even under normal circumstances he would gladly live in their bed and never get up, if only he could. It’s been his lifelong dream to hibernate through one winter, just so he doesn’t need to go through the bother to get up and dressed in the mornings.
Being pregnant has its good sides too, obviously. He is at least enjoying his days as a lazy bum.
Admittedly the moments he enjoys the most are the ones when the whole family is around him. They set up a television in the bedroom and thus the everyday tradition of watching evening cartoons is moved from the living room. Kyuhyun always gets the best place, propped up on pillows in the middle of the bed. Zhou Mi nuzzles close to him on one side, the twins choosing random spots depending on how they feel like.
Once upon a time the twins were the first ones to fall asleep in the evenings. Now their nights almost always end up in Minhee and Cheolhyun wrapping the sleeping Kyuhyun in blankets, kissing his forehead before they tiptoe out of the room. Zhou Mi thinks it’s absolutely hilarious.
One day, Kyuhyun is forcibly awakened from his afternoon nap when the sound of the doorbell ringing cuts through the air and jolts him from his sleep. It’s followed by quite insistent banging on the front door as well, and Kyuhyun already has a rising suspicion on who it could be. Even before he can hear the shrill “Open this door, Kyuhyun, or I will kick it down!” from the other side.
He waddles to the door as fast as he can, swinging it open only to be pushed aside by a clearly agitated Heechul. “Seasoning isn’t home, is he?” he asks, glancing at Kyuhyun shortly, before storming off into the living room. “Of course he isn’t, just my luck! Why is he the one working. Now I have to settle for you.”
Kyuhyun kind of wants to protest but he doesn’t get the chance, before Heechul spins around and gives him a once over, clearly looking distasteful. “…I hope to god I’m not going to get that huge.”
“What are you on, Heechul?” Kyuhyun asks, placing his hands on his hips. He does realize he looks like a frustrated hippo right now, but he can’t stop himself before it’s too late.
Surprisingly, Heechul doesn’t mock him for it, but instead sighs and drops to sit down on the couch. “I’m in the same boat as you now,” he sighs. “Although I am not sure if I like it.”
“You’re what?” Kyuhyun frowns.
Heechul groans. “I’m pregnant, you dipshit.”
Oh.
“Well,” Kyuhyun offers, lamely, “you will make a great mother?”
The next two hours he has to listen to Heechul go on and on about what an insensitive dick he is, and how he should never be allowed to have friends to console. Thankfully, Zhou Mi comes home then and he knows exactly how to handle Heechul. Before long the two end up squealing over some website with the most stylish baby-accessories available, and Kyuhyun silently escapes the scene.
Instead of walking, Kyuhyun waddles. He is also huge. As huge as Zhou Mi was, except he is only carrying one instead of twins. That is an endless source of amusement for Zhou Mi, who can’t stop from teasing Kyuhyun about it every chance he gets. That is how Kyuhyun already knows what’s going to follow when his better half gets that certain look in his eyes, looking at him with a thoughtful frown. “You know, Kuixian,” he drawls, “I think you gained a bit.”
Kyuhyun snorts. “I’m pregnant, Zhou Mi,” he says. “Of course I look fat and like I can’t possibly fit through any doorframes properly.” They’re folding the last load of laundry they washed and maybe he grabs the next shirt a little too roughly. No one needs to notice that though.
“No,” Zhou Mi says and shakes his head. “I don’t mean your belly. I mean your thighs. They look kind of squishy now. It’s cute though!”
Kyuhyun groans. This can’t end soon enough. “This is horrible!” he complains. “And you’re not helping. Where did that considerate and emphatic boyfriend go?” He’s nervous, he can’t help it. They both know that the baby might decide it’s time any day now.
“Don’t whine. I carried twins.” Zhou Mi’s voice is a little too chirpy, and his smile a notch too sunny. At least if one asks for Kyuhyun’s opinion on it. “You’re better suited for it anyway, you have sturdier, wider hips! If you were a woman, I bet you’d be a perfect build for giving birth.”
“You’re not helping,” Kyuhyun mutters. He knows his sulking will go unnoticed so he simply folds yet another shirt and carefully places it on the growing pile between them. “You should, I don’t know, cuddle me and bring me to bed and make me forget my aching ankles. Instead you just stand there and insult me.”
Suddenly, there’s a warm palm on his waist, soon joined by another. He closes his eyes as Zhou Mi slides his arms around him, pressing close to his back. “I’m cuddling you,” Zhou Mi practically purrs, the sound of it making Kyuhyun shiver a little bit in the embrace. “Want me to bring you to bed next?”
Kyuhyun takes one look at the pile of laundry that still needs to be folded. It only takes a split second and he covers Zhou Mi’s hands with his own, giving them a gentle squeeze. “Oh yes please.”
Finally the doctors decide they can’t wait any longer, it’s time for the little one to be born. The day of the operation it rains so much the roads are like rivers, the sky ripped open like the floodgates broke somewhere up there. Zhou Mi and the twins accompany Kyuhyun to the hospital and they’re given a single room, where the children spend their time being excited about every new item and machine they see.
Surprisingly, Kyuhyun is a lot calmer now that it’s him going into that operating room instead of Zhou Mi. It feels like their roles have been reversed in more ways than one. So when Heechul barges in with Han Geng close on his heels, uninvited, they both welcome them with bright smiles.
“I knew you would never survive through this without me,” Heechul sighs and waves his hand in the air. “I swear, once it’s my time to go through this you two owe me, big time!” He fusses over the blanket draped over Kyuhyun’s legs and makes Zhou Mi open the containers of food he smuggled in for them. Han Geng only watches, amused, trying to hold back all comments about Heechul already acting like a mother hen.
Han Geng ends up sitting on the floor with the twins, playing doctor with the random instruments they managed to find or steal in the hospital. They barely look up when Kyuhyun is taken away, waving at him and telling him to be a good daddy.
Zhou Mi is eerily pale, clutching on the armrest of the chair he’s sitting on. He tries to focus on the happy noises the kids make, the laughter that rings through the air in the room, the presence of his friends who he knows will be there throughout it all.
“It’s going to be fine,” Heechul smiles and squeezes Zhou Mi’s arm. It makes him feel a whole lot better.
“Mommy, mommy, look!” Minhee sounds so excited she might burst when she runs to Zhou Mi, her pigtails bouncing as she goes. She tugs on her father’s sleeve, distracting him from where he’s trying to feed the baby girl bundled up in the carriage. “They have cotton candy!” she says, as if it’s the best thing that has ever happened to her. As if all amusement parks don’t have that.
Zhou Mi laughs and digs into his pocket to see if he has some money. “Want to go buy some? Remember to get some for Cheolhyun too,” he reminds her, and instantly gets a serious nod as a reply.
“For the baby too!” Minhee announces, but Zhou Mi quickly shakes his head, explaining that the baby is too small for cotton candy. Kyuhyun agrees to go with her, seeing she’s so small she wouldn’t even reach over the counter to place her order. Meanwhile, Cheolhyun has found a collection of colourful rocks on the ground and is poking at them with a stick, as if they might suddenly come alive and attack him.
Soon enough the two return with their purchases, and Kyuhyun offers Zhou Mi a bite of his own pink and fluffy candy. “I figured they can share one,” he nods towards Minhee, who is already skipping over to her brother to offer him his half. The little dog is yapping next to them, displeased since he’d want to have a treat too, but they skilfully ignore him.
Kyuhyun doesn’t say anything, but Zhou Mi catches the longing glance he sends towards the Tornado, the newest death trap in the park. He grins, licking sugar off his lips. “I’ll watch the kids, you catch the wheel of death.”
“For real?” Kyuhyun’s eyes shine with enthusiasm. He gives a big, goofy smile as he leans in to peck Zhou Mi’s lips and thrusts the cotton candy into his hand. It’s been a while since he practically ran anywhere.
Zhou Mi laughs as he follows Kyuhyun with his eyes.
Zhou Mi watches Kyuhyun practically glow after the ride, tries to make the baby sleep again, changes Minhee’s puked on shirt and tells Cheolhyun for the umpteenth time he can’t have another ice cream.
He couldn’t be happier.
---
(9533 words)
add/subscribe | masterlist (LJ)/masterlist (DW) | request
THIS IS THE LATEST SEQUEL OF ALL LATE SEQUELS OMG I’M SO SORRY ;-; also /kicks fic/ this ate my soul. now can I have a life again.
I am also the slowest writer (or finisher…) of fics ever ;-; raaaaah
I put “Korean baby names” in Google. If Google lied to me, it’s not my fault ;~;
I CRY.
This entry was originally posted at http://rabenhorst.dreamwidth.org/91921.html. You can also comment there using OpenID!