Such is life, people don't owe you friendship in return for being nice to them and I don't see what this has to do with your issues. That you copypasted this doesn't matter, apparently you felt like it was true and relevant to your situation even though it's a deeply fucked up way of thinking. I've seen it in other parts of your journal too: you feel sorry for yourself when girls don't want to date you and instead of actually thinking about why they might not want to date you you blame them for not seeing how wonderful you are.
"Girls don't want to date me because I'm nice" is a way of telling yourself "it's not my fault girls want to date me, it's just that girls are mean" which is very immature and shallow. It doesn't matter what you do for a lady because they don't give a shit about that. They don't want a personal doormat who only exists to meet her every (emotional)need, they want someone who is fun, engaging, suits them, is smart etc. in short: what counts is personality. Telling yourself that girls are shallow bitches who only want money/muscles/jerks is a very shallow thing to do and so is thinking that women should like you just because you would do everything you think should make them happy. Treat them like people, not just prospective girlfriends.
Try actually responding to what I say beyond a childish "I'm not shallow!" because these problems are the reason girls won't date you.
Ok. Think that girls don't see how wonderful I am? I have problems thinking that I'm somehow "defective", it's taking me a long time to get over that. It's a long and slow process. I have issues, definitely.
But at the same time....sometimes I feel like.....well, I get doors slammed in my face in a way similar to that message. That's what made me...sympathize with it. Thankfully, it's not that all girls and women are attracted to jerks, I know. Honestly. Just sometimes I end up feeling like I'm taking crazy pills...and a couple of times I've been "cliche bombed".....that a girl I had hopes for....fell in love with some guy who seems like a cliche (and I understand by saying this I probably seem very shallow)
You have a very good point there, because ironically by subscribing to this, I'm....turning into the type of guy I do NOT want to be...the "misogynist by frustration"....a couple of guys I knew who threw around the b word like it was candy, because of....frustration. It's like I'm indirectly doing that, without use of any canine terminology. I guess....after so much...hurt....it's easy to fall into that trap, of that very shallow thing.
I do my best to not think "YOU OWE ME" either, but I have some ways to go.
"Girls don't want to date me because I'm nice" is a way of telling yourself "it's not my fault girls want to date me, it's just that girls are mean" which is very immature and shallow. It doesn't matter what you do for a lady because they don't give a shit about that. They don't want a personal doormat who only exists to meet her every (emotional)need, they want someone who is fun, engaging, suits them, is smart etc. in short: what counts is personality. Telling yourself that girls are shallow bitches who only want money/muscles/jerks is a very shallow thing to do and so is thinking that women should like you just because you would do everything you think should make them happy. Treat them like people, not just prospective girlfriends.
Try actually responding to what I say beyond a childish "I'm not shallow!" because these problems are the reason girls won't date you.
Reply
But at the same time....sometimes I feel like.....well, I get doors slammed in my face in a way similar to that message. That's what made me...sympathize with it. Thankfully, it's not that all girls and women are attracted to jerks, I know. Honestly. Just sometimes I end up feeling like I'm taking crazy pills...and a couple of times I've been "cliche bombed".....that a girl I had hopes for....fell in love with some guy who seems like a cliche (and I understand by saying this I probably seem very shallow)
You have a very good point there, because ironically by subscribing to this, I'm....turning into the type of guy I do NOT want to be...the "misogynist by frustration"....a couple of guys I knew who threw around the b word like it was candy, because of....frustration. It's like I'm indirectly doing that, without use of any canine terminology. I guess....after so much...hurt....it's easy to fall into that trap, of that very shallow thing.
I do my best to not think "YOU OWE ME" either, but I have some ways to go.
Oh, I posted this a few years ago, if it means anything.... http://raakone.livejournal.com/22379.html
May I ask who you are, where you are from, and how you found me?
Reply
Leave a comment