I wanna go back to Gainesville...
It's so hard to sleep when you are used to going to bed at 4am and everyone else in the family goes to bed at 10pm. So I just lay there for about 6 hours til I fall asleep then it's time for my sister to get up for school, so on go the lights and Im up again...this is rediculous. So what do I do for 6 hours in the middle of the night when I don't have AIM because my laptop is in Gainesville and I have no access to the other computers in my house because everyone is sleeping....? I stay up all night and think...and sometimes that's not the best thing for me to do... because I start to think about things that I shouldnt.
We can never be together I know it, unless he somehow changes. And some people just don't change. Then why do I STILL feel this way? Why do I feel like I can't let go, can't forget and move on? I want to be with someone but not like that. And I can't let myself find that person if part of me is still attached to him. I know what I need to do. I need to let go completely. I can't talk to him, I can't see him, I can't talk about him, and that's so hard. Because the next time he calls or I run into him, it's all gonna start right back up again, because he is my weakness.
We can never be together I know it, unless he somehow changes. And some people just don't change. Then why do I STILL feel this way? Why do I feel like I can't let go, can't forget and move on? I want to be with someone but not like that. And I can't let myself find that person if part of me is still attached to him. I know what I need to do. I need to let go completely. I can't talk to him, I can't see him, I can't talk about him, and that's so hard. Because the next time he calls or I run into him, it's all gonna start right back up again, because he is my weakness.