[hpsixwords timeline] owl for bigbadpadfoot. charmed for his eyes only.
((set in the hpsixwords 'verse. So very, extremely locked from muse knowledge. In every way possible. Unless, you know, your name is Sirius since the owl is for him. What he says in the beginning of the owl is not a lie; this is the only way that he was able to get anything out about this.))
Sirius,
I have been staring at this piece of parchment for, literally, hours now and even if there are so many things I want to say...nothing really makes enough sense to write down. Everything I feel, everything I'm thinking - nothing makes sense.
Then again, this whole bloody situation is absolutely senseless.
And I need to say something. I need to at least write it, because I feel like I am choking with everything I should be saying. But leave it to me, yes? Leave it to me to not say anything just yet. At the same time, I know that I shouldn't. Maisie doesn't deserve to be caught in the middle of this. Teddy and Harry shouldn't have gotten dragged into whatever all this is, and... Merlin, I just...
I cannot understand it. I cannot wrap my mind around what Dora said, and I cannot understand why she said it out loud where Harry and Teddy were able to hear. I try, and I try to make sense of it, yet it doesn't. Then again, I was the one that clearly said how I didn't regret going into the battle when I should have stayed behind for Teddy and Harry, so perhaps I shouldn't even say anything at all. What I said, however, wasn't... Merlin, I don't even know how to classify it as. All I know is that my sons (because that overprotectiveness has kicked in, and right now Harry is more than just a mixture of a nephew and a son - right now he is simply a son, but I am sure you understand) got hurt. They both got very hurt, and I have no idea how to fix it. Time will help, I'm sure, but I cannot stand the fact that I cannot do a thing about it. I hate it, Sirius. I just hate this whole situation, and good Godric I am just so angry. Thankfully I am doing a rather good job at hiding it, because I refuse to let Maisie see it, and Dora is pregnant and therefore shouldn't be upset, but it doesn't change that I am just...angry. So. bloody. angry. At what she said, what she implied, the fact that she might actually mean it, how it affected the boys. Everything. Just... Merlin. I don't even know what to say.
I know that Teddy moved into Grimmauld, and since you are there, could you please keep an eye on him for me? And on Harry as well, please. I know Harry will do just fine watching after Teddy, but he was also very upset over everything. I would try to help them make sense of everything, but at the moment I am having as much difficulty as they are. Please, just...watch after them, will you?
Sorry, for rambling the way I did and probably not making any sense. Like I said...nothing in all this has been making much sense at all.
Love,
Remus
Sirius,
I have been staring at this piece of parchment for, literally, hours now and even if there are so many things I want to say...nothing really makes enough sense to write down. Everything I feel, everything I'm thinking - nothing makes sense.
Then again, this whole bloody situation is absolutely senseless.
And I need to say something. I need to at least write it, because I feel like I am choking with everything I should be saying. But leave it to me, yes? Leave it to me to not say anything just yet. At the same time, I know that I shouldn't. Maisie doesn't deserve to be caught in the middle of this. Teddy and Harry shouldn't have gotten dragged into whatever all this is, and... Merlin, I just...
I cannot understand it. I cannot wrap my mind around what Dora said, and I cannot understand why she said it out loud where Harry and Teddy were able to hear. I try, and I try to make sense of it, yet it doesn't. Then again, I was the one that clearly said how I didn't regret going into the battle when I should have stayed behind for Teddy and Harry, so perhaps I shouldn't even say anything at all. What I said, however, wasn't... Merlin, I don't even know how to classify it as. All I know is that my sons (because that overprotectiveness has kicked in, and right now Harry is more than just a mixture of a nephew and a son - right now he is simply a son, but I am sure you understand) got hurt. They both got very hurt, and I have no idea how to fix it. Time will help, I'm sure, but I cannot stand the fact that I cannot do a thing about it. I hate it, Sirius. I just hate this whole situation, and good Godric I am just so angry. Thankfully I am doing a rather good job at hiding it, because I refuse to let Maisie see it, and Dora is pregnant and therefore shouldn't be upset, but it doesn't change that I am just...angry. So. bloody. angry. At what she said, what she implied, the fact that she might actually mean it, how it affected the boys. Everything. Just... Merlin. I don't even know what to say.
I know that Teddy moved into Grimmauld, and since you are there, could you please keep an eye on him for me? And on Harry as well, please. I know Harry will do just fine watching after Teddy, but he was also very upset over everything. I would try to help them make sense of everything, but at the moment I am having as much difficulty as they are. Please, just...watch after them, will you?
Sorry, for rambling the way I did and probably not making any sense. Like I said...nothing in all this has been making much sense at all.
Love,
Remus