hate me so you can finally see what's good for you..

[r_is_for_riot]

i was unhappy. not because of anything you did, but once i got myself involved in something it was too late when i realized that it wasn't what i wanted. i dont like being anyone's girlfriend. it's not that i like sleeping around with anyone or anything like that, but that label and what comes along with it isn't something i want to live up to right NOW. it leaves way too much room for disappointment.i was so focused on worrying what other people would think i overlooked what i wanted.

im so aware that i fucked up. i fucked around... i realized i wasnt happy and i tried to fix it and ignore things, but that didn't work. think im a bad person..think im a slut..think im a little girl..think ANYTHING..i really don't care. but right now, i'm happy. i dont hold grudges, and i really wish you wouldnt either.

i just wish i could have achieved that happiness by being a little more honest with you and myself, it would have been much easier. and for that, i am sorry.