Who knew?
So I finally did something that I've told myself would only make me upset.
I looked at Jonny's Myspace and the new photos of him and his boyfriend.
At first, I got the usual anxiety that I can't explain. And then after seeing the photos, I seriously feel so much better. It helps that his boyfriend is really really ugly. And I'm not just saying that, I really think he's truly unattractive (I know other people would side with me on this). It also helps that Jonny doesn't look too attractive himself. I think I saw, maybe for the first time, him for who he is. And I don't find it attractive anymore. The only thing that kind of pissed me off is that his boyfriend is wearing a t-shirt that I bought him, but it's really not a big deal. I just can't believe that something that I thought I would be upset over has made me feel better.
In a way, I feel bad for finally and totally getting over my past relationship at a point in my life where I'm already in a new one. But I can't change anything, and I'm happy that I feel good about it all.
I'll think the memories of that relationship will always be with me, the good and the bad. I was with him for a very long time, and there will always be a place for him in my heart. But it's over, and has been for while. And I'm finally okay with it all.
I'm so happy where I'm at right now. I couldn't ask for a better boy to be with. He treats me better than I've ever been treated before. And I love him and I hope I'm with him for a very long time. I hope I'm here for a very long time.
Coming here is probably the best decision I've ever made. Right along with coming back.
I looked at Jonny's Myspace and the new photos of him and his boyfriend.
At first, I got the usual anxiety that I can't explain. And then after seeing the photos, I seriously feel so much better. It helps that his boyfriend is really really ugly. And I'm not just saying that, I really think he's truly unattractive (I know other people would side with me on this). It also helps that Jonny doesn't look too attractive himself. I think I saw, maybe for the first time, him for who he is. And I don't find it attractive anymore. The only thing that kind of pissed me off is that his boyfriend is wearing a t-shirt that I bought him, but it's really not a big deal. I just can't believe that something that I thought I would be upset over has made me feel better.
In a way, I feel bad for finally and totally getting over my past relationship at a point in my life where I'm already in a new one. But I can't change anything, and I'm happy that I feel good about it all.
I'll think the memories of that relationship will always be with me, the good and the bad. I was with him for a very long time, and there will always be a place for him in my heart. But it's over, and has been for while. And I'm finally okay with it all.
I'm so happy where I'm at right now. I couldn't ask for a better boy to be with. He treats me better than I've ever been treated before. And I love him and I hope I'm with him for a very long time. I hope I'm here for a very long time.
Coming here is probably the best decision I've ever made. Right along with coming back.