(no subject)
Well, I'm home. Safe and sound and with a brand new obsession in tow. Everyone knows tornadoes turn me on. But in the past I've been satisfied with a tornado calender and watching the occasional documentary.
now I am eating sleeping and dreaming weather patterns, cloud shapes and colours, climatology, and photographing the weather.
The holiday was unbelievable. I've booked a 2nd tour and if all goes well I'll be back out chasing again in five weeks.
No words can describe how complete and content I felt. Sat in the van for 12 hours a day, looking at clouds, and trying to make some sense from the plethora of science being banded about. I felt like Id come home. Like Id found my 'thing'. Everyone else has always had a thing. I never did. Now I feel like I have a thing, and that thing is all encompassing. Chasing is the perfect mix of art and science. Im so frustrated at not understanding it all already, but Im enjoying spending every spare second reading up on it.
Today was my first day back at work, and everything has changed. Or rather, I have changed. Work has lost all its importance on my life. It seems insignificant now. Pointless, mundane, dull. All the things I got off on before the holiday are now nothing more than interruptions in my storm chasing research. Perhaps this will ease with time. Im not stupid. I know everyone has a comedown after a great holiday. I really hope I get my buzz back for work soon.
Theres more than a little jet lag to work though, which probably isnt helping. Im on my knees with exhaustion. I was hoping to spend all of yesterday asleep, but life has a way of throwing you off guard sometimes. On this occasion, as soon as I got back home I found out my grandad's had a stroke. Hes in hospital, unconscious. They cant get the tube down his throat and so have decided not to feed him. There are three options available to him.
1) He starts to improve enough to wake up and feed himself.
2) He'll die quickly
3) He'll starve to death over the next two or three weeks.
I have so many mixed emotions the storm chasing research is proving a good distraction. I feel so guilty though. Three people in two days have said they've never seen me so happy. five people have asked if Im going to move out to the US, because Ive been so enthralled. All this, with Grandad about to kark it. I feel so guilty. I cant even go and be with him, and my family. I only get five days compassionate leave, and this could go on for weeks. So whilst my family spend 8 hours a day at his bedside, waiting for him to die, and cleaning up the blood that the hospital staff fail to do, I am happy with my head in the clouds. Again with the guilt. I am a terrible daughter / granddaughter.
I wish I was back out on the plains.
now I am eating sleeping and dreaming weather patterns, cloud shapes and colours, climatology, and photographing the weather.
The holiday was unbelievable. I've booked a 2nd tour and if all goes well I'll be back out chasing again in five weeks.
No words can describe how complete and content I felt. Sat in the van for 12 hours a day, looking at clouds, and trying to make some sense from the plethora of science being banded about. I felt like Id come home. Like Id found my 'thing'. Everyone else has always had a thing. I never did. Now I feel like I have a thing, and that thing is all encompassing. Chasing is the perfect mix of art and science. Im so frustrated at not understanding it all already, but Im enjoying spending every spare second reading up on it.
Today was my first day back at work, and everything has changed. Or rather, I have changed. Work has lost all its importance on my life. It seems insignificant now. Pointless, mundane, dull. All the things I got off on before the holiday are now nothing more than interruptions in my storm chasing research. Perhaps this will ease with time. Im not stupid. I know everyone has a comedown after a great holiday. I really hope I get my buzz back for work soon.
Theres more than a little jet lag to work though, which probably isnt helping. Im on my knees with exhaustion. I was hoping to spend all of yesterday asleep, but life has a way of throwing you off guard sometimes. On this occasion, as soon as I got back home I found out my grandad's had a stroke. Hes in hospital, unconscious. They cant get the tube down his throat and so have decided not to feed him. There are three options available to him.
1) He starts to improve enough to wake up and feed himself.
2) He'll die quickly
3) He'll starve to death over the next two or three weeks.
I have so many mixed emotions the storm chasing research is proving a good distraction. I feel so guilty though. Three people in two days have said they've never seen me so happy. five people have asked if Im going to move out to the US, because Ive been so enthralled. All this, with Grandad about to kark it. I feel so guilty. I cant even go and be with him, and my family. I only get five days compassionate leave, and this could go on for weeks. So whilst my family spend 8 hours a day at his bedside, waiting for him to die, and cleaning up the blood that the hospital staff fail to do, I am happy with my head in the clouds. Again with the guilt. I am a terrible daughter / granddaughter.
I wish I was back out on the plains.