Only One Thing Went Right Today
Only one thing went right today, and it wouldn't surprise me if it weren't the very best thing that happens to me all week. Scratch that....I think I mean more that it was much more likely that God put this situation in front of me at the beginning of my horrible week to come so that I could GET through this week. Yeah, that'll be more like it, I'll bet.
Before I get to the good part, the reason this week is going to be SO bad is that I have to disengage from 2 crack/heroine addicts who are my new neighbors, and who have 24/7 access to my door, my car, my mailbox and everything in my life, and the female has attached herself to me like I am her new best friend. And I am SUCH a weak coward, and SUCH a BAD liar. If I were a better liar, I could tell lies to get out of situations perhaps, but no.... I will have to take the bull by the horns, stop being a coward and cut her completely out of my life - but somehow without making her mad enough to use that knife in her purse or mad enough to just rob my apartment when I'm out or sabotage my car/cut my brakelines when I'm home.
OK, so, today, I had to take her to the county courthouse because the other heroine addict, who was her fiance had physically assaulted her Saturday, choking her and dragging her 50 yards by the hair and the throat into the building. She brings this trouble into MY door, and tells me to call 911. So he is still in jail now, on Monday, and we are at the courthouse, getting her a PPO (Personal Protection Order). When I get done with this errand, which she legitimately needs, I am supposed to tell her that I will never take her anywhere again.
OK, here finally, comes that "One Thing that Went Right Today"
While I was waiting alone in the hallway of the courthouse, (Crackheads with nicotine fits aren't good at patiently waiting, and tend to wander off -- good riddance for a few minutes!), there was an older black woman with a very young baby. She was obviously either the grandmother, or just watching the baby, as she was about 60 or more. The baby had a small bottle of water only, and that wasn't working and "granny" was not choosing to stand up and walk with the baby whose cries were getting louder.
And I was feeling or hearing that little quiet Voice inside - Do you know that one? The one that you are not sure if it is God telling you to get involved, or if it is just YOU wanting to get involved? Well, either way, I figured if she allowed me to try to help, that it wouldn't matter if it were GOD, or me, since it would be a good deed, right? And if God didn't want it, He certainly could stop it right at the start. (And besides, neither of these was my only purpose anyway, as you'll find out later.)
So I approached the three seats where she was, and I asked if I could sit in the one 2 spots over, leaving that "safety zone" between us. After all, she didn't know me from Adam, and we did perhaps have a racial barrier between us to figure out. OK, so I look pretty darn safe near a baby. Frankly, I don't look like I can run very far, and I look clean and decent anyway, if not pretty and girly anymore. That, and the fact that there were other folks in the hallway, including men and sheriffs for her to scream for help to, may have helped my case. I asked very gently if she would TRUST me to try holding the baby, smiling, and pointing out with a small laugh that I really couldn't run very far. And she let me!
This baby was only 2 months old. I already knew this, and I know that most youngies like to feel very safe. Safe means skin contact, not the feel of Granny's coat. And safety means pressure or contact all along the baby's BELLY, not face up. Babies that young up feel exposed when facing up. It's just like a cat or other animal - instinctively they need to protect their bellies - where all their important organs are. If you have a cat who will let you hold it belly up "like a baby" and let you rub its tummy - that's a very submissive cat. So I put this little cherub in what's called the "Football Hold", along my forearm (contact me if you need explanation) and I brought her up closer to my mouth and began to sing.
That was the real purpose after all. Other than me knowing this different face-down hold, the real "trick up my sleeve" that I thought would help this woman - the real gift that I had to give at that moment was my voice - that, and the courage to sing in a public place. Courage indeed, because the ONLY songs I know are HYMNS or Christian solo pieces.
Two verses of "In the Garden" and the baby was no longer crying and by the middle of "Old Rugged Cross" that baby was long gone asleep, and I had peeked at the grandmother and suspected that sniffle wasn't a sniffle, but a sniff. The only thing I said to the grandmother was a small joke as I switched to the third song - I said, "Hey, I think we have the makings of a good Baptist here."
Several people passed by during my three songs, and they must have heard the words. It's not a loud hallway, and the acoustics were great. And I have excellent diction, but I was singing quite softly. The point wasn't to reach all the people in the hallway, although I did chalk that up as an added bonus. The point wasn't even to reach that grandmother really. I don't get any "points" for doing anything for the kingdom of God. Forgive me, but my point was that I just SOOOO wanted to sing to that little baby. I'm just that selfish. Every time I go to do something good - that is just SO in there.
In this Ghastly day and week that I was facing, this Horrible weekend I had and the Awful drug addict I had brought with me -
I just wanted a few minutes of SWEETNESS and PURITY.
And this wonderful woman trusted me with her baby, and I was so BLESSED and HONORED.
Before I get to the good part, the reason this week is going to be SO bad is that I have to disengage from 2 crack/heroine addicts who are my new neighbors, and who have 24/7 access to my door, my car, my mailbox and everything in my life, and the female has attached herself to me like I am her new best friend. And I am SUCH a weak coward, and SUCH a BAD liar. If I were a better liar, I could tell lies to get out of situations perhaps, but no.... I will have to take the bull by the horns, stop being a coward and cut her completely out of my life - but somehow without making her mad enough to use that knife in her purse or mad enough to just rob my apartment when I'm out or sabotage my car/cut my brakelines when I'm home.
OK, so, today, I had to take her to the county courthouse because the other heroine addict, who was her fiance had physically assaulted her Saturday, choking her and dragging her 50 yards by the hair and the throat into the building. She brings this trouble into MY door, and tells me to call 911. So he is still in jail now, on Monday, and we are at the courthouse, getting her a PPO (Personal Protection Order). When I get done with this errand, which she legitimately needs, I am supposed to tell her that I will never take her anywhere again.
OK, here finally, comes that "One Thing that Went Right Today"
While I was waiting alone in the hallway of the courthouse, (Crackheads with nicotine fits aren't good at patiently waiting, and tend to wander off -- good riddance for a few minutes!), there was an older black woman with a very young baby. She was obviously either the grandmother, or just watching the baby, as she was about 60 or more. The baby had a small bottle of water only, and that wasn't working and "granny" was not choosing to stand up and walk with the baby whose cries were getting louder.
And I was feeling or hearing that little quiet Voice inside - Do you know that one? The one that you are not sure if it is God telling you to get involved, or if it is just YOU wanting to get involved? Well, either way, I figured if she allowed me to try to help, that it wouldn't matter if it were GOD, or me, since it would be a good deed, right? And if God didn't want it, He certainly could stop it right at the start. (And besides, neither of these was my only purpose anyway, as you'll find out later.)
So I approached the three seats where she was, and I asked if I could sit in the one 2 spots over, leaving that "safety zone" between us. After all, she didn't know me from Adam, and we did perhaps have a racial barrier between us to figure out. OK, so I look pretty darn safe near a baby. Frankly, I don't look like I can run very far, and I look clean and decent anyway, if not pretty and girly anymore. That, and the fact that there were other folks in the hallway, including men and sheriffs for her to scream for help to, may have helped my case. I asked very gently if she would TRUST me to try holding the baby, smiling, and pointing out with a small laugh that I really couldn't run very far. And she let me!
This baby was only 2 months old. I already knew this, and I know that most youngies like to feel very safe. Safe means skin contact, not the feel of Granny's coat. And safety means pressure or contact all along the baby's BELLY, not face up. Babies that young up feel exposed when facing up. It's just like a cat or other animal - instinctively they need to protect their bellies - where all their important organs are. If you have a cat who will let you hold it belly up "like a baby" and let you rub its tummy - that's a very submissive cat. So I put this little cherub in what's called the "Football Hold", along my forearm (contact me if you need explanation) and I brought her up closer to my mouth and began to sing.
That was the real purpose after all. Other than me knowing this different face-down hold, the real "trick up my sleeve" that I thought would help this woman - the real gift that I had to give at that moment was my voice - that, and the courage to sing in a public place. Courage indeed, because the ONLY songs I know are HYMNS or Christian solo pieces.
Two verses of "In the Garden" and the baby was no longer crying and by the middle of "Old Rugged Cross" that baby was long gone asleep, and I had peeked at the grandmother and suspected that sniffle wasn't a sniffle, but a sniff. The only thing I said to the grandmother was a small joke as I switched to the third song - I said, "Hey, I think we have the makings of a good Baptist here."
Several people passed by during my three songs, and they must have heard the words. It's not a loud hallway, and the acoustics were great. And I have excellent diction, but I was singing quite softly. The point wasn't to reach all the people in the hallway, although I did chalk that up as an added bonus. The point wasn't even to reach that grandmother really. I don't get any "points" for doing anything for the kingdom of God. Forgive me, but my point was that I just SOOOO wanted to sing to that little baby. I'm just that selfish. Every time I go to do something good - that is just SO in there.
In this Ghastly day and week that I was facing, this Horrible weekend I had and the Awful drug addict I had brought with me -
I just wanted a few minutes of SWEETNESS and PURITY.
And this wonderful woman trusted me with her baby, and I was so BLESSED and HONORED.