(no subject)
ok so in all honesty i have no idea what's going on here. for some strange reason mo isn't talking to me and i cant figure it out. its actually starting to seriously hurt my feelings. if i did something wrong dude, you have to tell me. i've gone through everything in my head and cant figure it out.
so i went to this little chinese place with scott yesterday. it was pretty good i must say. i think we may have finally found a good chinese restaurant to spend my money in. so this was at about 2 maybe. i dont know the time. then later that night after another glorious 2 1/2 hours of reading more english since i had to read 76 pages of a play, it was off to bw's for dinner. again... with scott. and his best friend/ my neighbor michael. those two are weird as hell but they're really nice.
i dont know what i'm going to do about this whole nick thing. i mean i wrote his effing paper for him. in osu terms, that's reason for expulsion. that effer better not get caught. but then again... would he really turn me in if he did? i dont know. yes its lame of me, but i was hoping for more to come out of this situation than just me writing his paper. i mean, i have it bad for this kid. so bad that no matter what he asks me for or what he asks me to do, for some stupid reason, i do it.
i dont know whether its me being mad at this situation, or being mad at myself, but i seem to be super pissed at myself for letting myself get this attached to someone again. the sad thing, i think he's completely oblivious. i mean, do i tell him? do i just let it go? i dont know. i tried so hard not to let myself fall for anyone after josh moved. its too hard to deal with that. it hurts like hell and i dont know if i could go through it again. i told myself that its not worth it and that there are far more important things to worry about right now than that.
i have no idea where i'm going with any of this. this whole month has just been one big ball of confusion. i'll be so glad when its just november instead of god awful october. mother effing month.
so i went to this little chinese place with scott yesterday. it was pretty good i must say. i think we may have finally found a good chinese restaurant to spend my money in. so this was at about 2 maybe. i dont know the time. then later that night after another glorious 2 1/2 hours of reading more english since i had to read 76 pages of a play, it was off to bw's for dinner. again... with scott. and his best friend/ my neighbor michael. those two are weird as hell but they're really nice.
i dont know what i'm going to do about this whole nick thing. i mean i wrote his effing paper for him. in osu terms, that's reason for expulsion. that effer better not get caught. but then again... would he really turn me in if he did? i dont know. yes its lame of me, but i was hoping for more to come out of this situation than just me writing his paper. i mean, i have it bad for this kid. so bad that no matter what he asks me for or what he asks me to do, for some stupid reason, i do it.
i dont know whether its me being mad at this situation, or being mad at myself, but i seem to be super pissed at myself for letting myself get this attached to someone again. the sad thing, i think he's completely oblivious. i mean, do i tell him? do i just let it go? i dont know. i tried so hard not to let myself fall for anyone after josh moved. its too hard to deal with that. it hurts like hell and i dont know if i could go through it again. i told myself that its not worth it and that there are far more important things to worry about right now than that.
i have no idea where i'm going with any of this. this whole month has just been one big ball of confusion. i'll be so glad when its just november instead of god awful october. mother effing month.