30 Ways to Annoy Jasper Hale
This is just so funny that I have to join in! Warning: If you actually meet Jasper Hale and try these on him, don't blame ME if he kills you and drinks your blood. It's your own fault. Also, I do not own the character Jasper Hale (although I totally wish I did).
1. Constantly call him Jasper Cullen. Act confused if he corrects you.
2. Ask him why Edward is "so much cooler".
3. Talk about blood. All the time. Especially human blood.
4. Destroy all of his clothes and have Alice buy him a new wardrobe.
5. Track down a bunch of fangirls. Set them loose on Jasper.
6. Get a papercut and wave it around, looking as tempting as possible.
7. Switch emotions constantly, and do so until Jasper goes crazy.
8. Ask him where his fangs are.
9. In the middle of a conversation, suddenly say, "I wonder how Maria's doing! Does she own Mexico yet?"
10. Speak in the best Southern accent you can muster, and call Jasper "Major".
11. But him a cowboy hat and lasso for Christmas.
12. Tell him you're doing a project on the Civil War and need an "eyewitness account".
13. Pretend to be Alice. Whenever he talks to you, answer as Alice would. If he says your name, tell him your name is Alice. Even if the real Alice turns up, still pretend you're Alice.
14. Tell him there are people that spend all of their time thinking of ways to annoy him.
15. Hide the motorcycle Edward gave him. Tell him Edward took it back because he didn't ride it enough.
16. Return aforementioned motorcycle, after painting it pink.
17. Ask him why he has a bed if he doesn't sleep. Laugh hysterically and run away.
18. Paint everything he owns a delicious shade of blood-red.
19. Laugh at him if it makes him look hungry (or thirsty).
20. Tell him that Bella/Rosalie/Esme/Leah Clearwater has a crush on him.
21. Lock him in a room full of delicious-smelling humans for about three months.
22. Get everyone to place bets on how many he'll eat.
23. Tell him that you've signed him up to teach newborns how to fight.
24. Videotape everything he does (and I mean EVERYTHING) for a week, and sell the tape to fangirls.
25. Steal his stuff and sell it to fangirls.
26. Tell the Volturi that Jasper wants to join. Buy Jasper a black cloak so he can look the part.
27. Make Jasper and Rosalie dress identically, and then exclaim over how cute twins are.
28. Ask him if Bella's 18th birthday party was fun.
29. Ask him how you're feeling. If he answers, tell him he guessed wrong.
30. If he doesn't answer, be smug and say, "I knew you were making it up!"
1. Constantly call him Jasper Cullen. Act confused if he corrects you.
2. Ask him why Edward is "so much cooler".
3. Talk about blood. All the time. Especially human blood.
4. Destroy all of his clothes and have Alice buy him a new wardrobe.
5. Track down a bunch of fangirls. Set them loose on Jasper.
6. Get a papercut and wave it around, looking as tempting as possible.
7. Switch emotions constantly, and do so until Jasper goes crazy.
8. Ask him where his fangs are.
9. In the middle of a conversation, suddenly say, "I wonder how Maria's doing! Does she own Mexico yet?"
10. Speak in the best Southern accent you can muster, and call Jasper "Major".
11. But him a cowboy hat and lasso for Christmas.
12. Tell him you're doing a project on the Civil War and need an "eyewitness account".
13. Pretend to be Alice. Whenever he talks to you, answer as Alice would. If he says your name, tell him your name is Alice. Even if the real Alice turns up, still pretend you're Alice.
14. Tell him there are people that spend all of their time thinking of ways to annoy him.
15. Hide the motorcycle Edward gave him. Tell him Edward took it back because he didn't ride it enough.
16. Return aforementioned motorcycle, after painting it pink.
17. Ask him why he has a bed if he doesn't sleep. Laugh hysterically and run away.
18. Paint everything he owns a delicious shade of blood-red.
19. Laugh at him if it makes him look hungry (or thirsty).
20. Tell him that Bella/Rosalie/Esme/Leah Clearwater has a crush on him.
21. Lock him in a room full of delicious-smelling humans for about three months.
22. Get everyone to place bets on how many he'll eat.
23. Tell him that you've signed him up to teach newborns how to fight.
24. Videotape everything he does (and I mean EVERYTHING) for a week, and sell the tape to fangirls.
25. Steal his stuff and sell it to fangirls.
26. Tell the Volturi that Jasper wants to join. Buy Jasper a black cloak so he can look the part.
27. Make Jasper and Rosalie dress identically, and then exclaim over how cute twins are.
28. Ask him if Bella's 18th birthday party was fun.
29. Ask him how you're feeling. If he answers, tell him he guessed wrong.
30. If he doesn't answer, be smug and say, "I knew you were making it up!"