Control ♥
I wrote this a loooong time ago, (like last year...) but I'm feeling it again now. Even though it's different from my other stuff...more slam-ish. And not in verses. Sorry if it gets confusing.
*Comment PUH-LEAZE!
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I don’t know why I feel this way, but I do.
When you look at me, smiling that crooked smile in a way that only you can, I see the twinkle in your eye.
It beckons, pulling me in.
But I can’t go with you.
I need to-to keep control over myself, stop my heart from almost bursting every time your gaze stops at me.
But I’ve already lost it.
Any control I used to have over my mind, my emotions, is now gone.
I’m falling to pieces. Falling apart. Falling into a black, bottomless abyss with no hope for escape.
And this is all new to me.
It isn’t a problem I can solve, data I can analyze, and definitely not some sort of machine that I can turn on or off on a whim.
And I’m clueless.
I wish I could just stop everything that’s happening to me, stuff all my feelings into a bottle, cork it up, and launch it into the Pacific Ocean, never to return.
But do I really want to throw away my feelings, my emotions?
I’m afraid of getting my heart broken, but I’m addicted…
To the flip-flopping of my heart whenever you look my way, your crooked smile and the twinkle in your eye.
To the electric shiver that runs down my spine when you walk by, your shoulder just barely brushing up against mine.
But when I’m in my room, sitting on my bed, daydreaming about everything that could be, just wishing that it would be, I realize that it’s wrong. Just wrong.
But then why does it feel so right?
I want to be in love…to feel the same way about someone as they feel about me.
But I can’t let you pull me in.
This infatuation will only lead to heartbreak.
So when you twinkle your eyes and smile that crooked smile, I force myself to look away, calm my flip-flopping heart, and regain control.
*Comment PUH-LEAZE!
<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
I don’t know why I feel this way, but I do.
When you look at me, smiling that crooked smile in a way that only you can, I see the twinkle in your eye.
It beckons, pulling me in.
But I can’t go with you.
I need to-to keep control over myself, stop my heart from almost bursting every time your gaze stops at me.
But I’ve already lost it.
Any control I used to have over my mind, my emotions, is now gone.
I’m falling to pieces. Falling apart. Falling into a black, bottomless abyss with no hope for escape.
And this is all new to me.
It isn’t a problem I can solve, data I can analyze, and definitely not some sort of machine that I can turn on or off on a whim.
And I’m clueless.
I wish I could just stop everything that’s happening to me, stuff all my feelings into a bottle, cork it up, and launch it into the Pacific Ocean, never to return.
But do I really want to throw away my feelings, my emotions?
I’m afraid of getting my heart broken, but I’m addicted…
To the flip-flopping of my heart whenever you look my way, your crooked smile and the twinkle in your eye.
To the electric shiver that runs down my spine when you walk by, your shoulder just barely brushing up against mine.
But when I’m in my room, sitting on my bed, daydreaming about everything that could be, just wishing that it would be, I realize that it’s wrong. Just wrong.
But then why does it feel so right?
I want to be in love…to feel the same way about someone as they feel about me.
But I can’t let you pull me in.
This infatuation will only lead to heartbreak.
So when you twinkle your eyes and smile that crooked smile, I force myself to look away, calm my flip-flopping heart, and regain control.