Questions about where to cultivate my seed and how better to grow
One of my resolutions was to become a member of Toastmasters. I have attended three meetings so far, including two different chapters. The first group is the Washtenaw Toastmasters which I didn't feel comfortable about. From the way people talked and presented themselves, it seemed pretty conservative, heterosexist and gender conformist. I really felt freaked out and a bit ragey after every meeting. I couldn't wait to get the fuck out of there.
For example, at the last meeting, there was a book auction and people took turns promoting their books in order to raise funds for the club. So one book sounded interesting until the presenter said, "I like it because it talks about a time when 'men were men', and ... " I forget the rest but something about courting ladies or whatever--the men are supposed to be rugged and strong.
Another presenter had a book called Hip Knits and then she went on about how everyone could pretend that the men who bid on it were getting it for their girlfriends or wives... like it was funny the notion that men knit. Afterwards, I was trying to be friendly and cordial--I introduced myself to her and then said, "I have male friend of mine is a prolific knitter..." Her response was "Hunh!"
This Huron Valley group is smaller, seems more laid back, but also was a bit disorganized. I was asked to speak on a topic as were the other guests which was a bit nerve-wracking but okay. I did want to speak although I didn't know I'd be called on. And the president brought home-made cheesecake! I thought the president's feedback for one of the speakers was ill advised--he told her that she shouldn't thank the audience, but that the audience should thank her for her time and what she shared with the audience. I totally disagree. Manners would say that you thank your audience for their time and consideration--and it's a two-way street. The audience of course can give their gratitude as well.
The members of the Washtenaw group are definitely more aggressive, organized and challenge my comfort zone. Yet, would I grow better in a more relaxed, less intense environment? I definitely want to go to at least one more meeting of each chapter before I make my final decision.
For example, at the last meeting, there was a book auction and people took turns promoting their books in order to raise funds for the club. So one book sounded interesting until the presenter said, "I like it because it talks about a time when 'men were men', and ... " I forget the rest but something about courting ladies or whatever--the men are supposed to be rugged and strong.
Another presenter had a book called Hip Knits and then she went on about how everyone could pretend that the men who bid on it were getting it for their girlfriends or wives... like it was funny the notion that men knit. Afterwards, I was trying to be friendly and cordial--I introduced myself to her and then said, "I have male friend of mine is a prolific knitter..." Her response was "Hunh!"
This Huron Valley group is smaller, seems more laid back, but also was a bit disorganized. I was asked to speak on a topic as were the other guests which was a bit nerve-wracking but okay. I did want to speak although I didn't know I'd be called on. And the president brought home-made cheesecake! I thought the president's feedback for one of the speakers was ill advised--he told her that she shouldn't thank the audience, but that the audience should thank her for her time and what she shared with the audience. I totally disagree. Manners would say that you thank your audience for their time and consideration--and it's a two-way street. The audience of course can give their gratitude as well.
The members of the Washtenaw group are definitely more aggressive, organized and challenge my comfort zone. Yet, would I grow better in a more relaxed, less intense environment? I definitely want to go to at least one more meeting of each chapter before I make my final decision.